


Amour Imprévu

by helianthuswrites



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Maybe OOC, Modern AU, Past Abuse Mentions, Sex Jokes and References
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-18
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2018-07-15 18:28:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 73,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7233817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/helianthuswrites/pseuds/helianthuswrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“I do not believe I have ever seen you in a more pathetic state, Hamilton.” The mocking voice of Thomas Jefferson spoke. “Mind if I join you?"<br/>Hamilton glared over his shoulder at the man in question. “Yes, actually, I do mind.”<br/>In hindsight, he would have been more convincing, had his words not all been slurred together. <i></i></i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>
    <i>He hated him, of course he did. That's why he couldn't seem to get him off of his mind, right? Yeah, that had to be it.</i>
  </i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. whiskey princess

Alexander waved down the bartender, gesturing that he wanted another glass. No matter how many glasses he downed, his sorrows just didn’t seem to go with them. His next glass was gone in a matter of minutes, and the buzz that was dulling his senses slowly increased. The empty glass was soon filled, and he found himself entranced with the way the amber liquid shone in the crystal glass.

He took a large gulp, relishing the slight burn down his throat that had been accompanying him all night. First, it was from the crying, but the last hour or so, maybe longer, it had been from the whiskey.

From beside him, his phone buzzed incessantly. He saw texts upon texts, and instead of opening them to read them, he simply turned off his phone.

“Another, Mr. Hamilton?” The bartender caught him off guard, not having even realized that his glass was empty.

He nodded in agreement and pushed his glass towards him. “Another.”

The bartender topped off his glass and Alexander pulled it back to him. He lifted it to his lips when he heard a voice from behind him.

“I do not believe I have ever seen you in a more pathetic state, Hamilton.” The mocking voice of Thomas Jefferson spoke. “Mind if I join you?”

Hamilton glared over his shoulder at the man in question. “Yes, actually, I do mind.”

In hindsight, he would have been more convincing, had his words not all been slurred together.

Jefferson rolled his eyes at the nearly drunk man and sat next to him anyways. Since when did he care what Hamilton said, anyways? “How many glasses have you drank?”

“I dunno.” He downed the rest of what was left in his glass and signaled the bartender for yet another.

“How many is that?” Jefferson questioned the bartender as he topped off Hamilton’s glass.

The bartender shrugged. “I don’t know, he was here when my shift started.”

Jefferson sighed. He had come to the bar to unwind, but of course, Hamilton had to be there to mess everything up. Just like always, he was the one having to pick up his messes.

“What the hell, Hamilton?” He snatched away the glass from him. “You’re going to drink yourself to death at this rate.”

Alexander tried to reach for the glass, ignoring his words. The man didn’t have to be here, didn’t have to act like he was an infant who needed supervision; he wasn’t his caretaker. Hell, he didn’t even like him. What business was it of his?

Thomas grabbed him by the shoulders forcefully. “You’re not getting the damn glass. I wouldn’t be surprised if any more alcohol consumed as quickly as you’re taking it killed you.”

Alexander scoffed, but it sounded more like something was caught in his throat. “Maybe that’s what I’m trying to accomplish.”

“Shut the fuck up, Hamilton, you’re drunk.” Thomas’s tone went icy as he grabbed the bridge of his nose. It was going to be a long night.

It was as if something clicked inside of Hamilton and he stopped struggling against Thomas for the glass. Thomas breathed a sigh of relief and turned to face the area behind the bar. He took a drink of the stolen glass from Hamilton, wrinkling his nose both at the burn of the alcohol and the cheap flavor.

He turned back to Hamilton, only to find the drunk man stumbling from his barstool to another one, further from Thomas. He was having to hold onto the stools as he walked and was still tripping every other step. Thomas watched with an amused expression, wanting to see just what the bastard orphan was doing.

When he finally reached what he thought was a good enough distance, he sat down on the stool. Well, no. Since he was drunk off his ass, his depth perception was off, and instead of sitting on the barstool like he attempted, he missed and found himself well, on his ass.

Thomas shook his head and ran his hand through his already messy hair. Why was it that the only man he had felt feelings for in the last year was one of the biggest messes in America?

He pocketed Hamilton’s forgotten phone and walked over to him, looking down on him. Then again, when wasn’t he? This time just happened to be in the literal sense.

“I don’t need your help, Jefferson.” His words were all slurred together, but still, Jefferson was able to make them out.

“Yeah, well I’m not just going to leave you on the floor of a dirty bar.” He rolled his eyes. “Call it my Southern Charm.”

“Southern Charm my ass.” Hamilton tried to lift himself by placing a hand on the nearest barstool and the bar, but he got about halfway up before falling again.

Thomas narrowed his eyes, slowly becoming less willing to help the asshole on the ground in front of him. On the flip side, Alexander was just as unwilling to be helped by him. However, Thomas knew he’d just feel guilty for leaving the pathetic man alone, which is why he found himself leaning down and picking up Alexander bridal style.

“Put me down.” He halfheartedly protested, pushing against Thomas’s chest as they exited the bar. Thomas had thrown a few large bills on the bar, hopefully enough to cover whatever Hamilton drank.

“As tempting as it is to drop your sorry ass on the concrete, I’m not that unclassy. Why were you even there tonight, Hamilton?"

"None of your damned business, Jefferson."

Must be Laurens again, then. Thomas carried him in silence for a few minutes, which was actually a little worrying considering that Hamilton _never_ shuts up. He looked down at the man in his arms, who was looking back at him, trying to stifle giggles.

“What is so funny?” Thomas questioned, trying to focus on where he was walking.

Alexander broke out in giggles at that statement, unable to hold them back anymore. They just kept coming and coming, and every time the giggles would start to die down, they would start up again.

Jefferson opened the door to his apartment building with his back, thankful the door was a push door and not a pull, as his arms were occupied. Hamilton was still giggling loudly, much to his dismay.

He pressed the elevator button and waited patiently for it to arrive, hoping to whatever God there was that Hamilton would shut the hell up. His wish came true as he stood in the elevator and the giggles slowly came to a stop.

“Mind telling me what you thought was so funny?”

Hamilton looked up at him through his eyelashes. “It’s just, thirty minutes ago I wanted to get hit by a bus, and I still do, but now I have the pretty Secretary Jefferson carrying me. And he's so strong, too. But don't tell him that.”

Jefferson smirked; this would definitely be used against him at some point. He exited the elevator on his floor (one of the top ones) and walked to his door.

“I’m going to have to set you down, now.” He warned, before setting a wobbly Alexander on his feet. He kept a secure arm around his waist, to keep him from falling, as he unlocked his apartment. He picked Hamilton up- he was sure that he could walk on his own but he also didn't want anything to be broke inside his home. Or at least, that's what he told himself his reasoning was.

“This isn’t my apartment.” Hamilton sounded slightly sleepy now, much to Jefferson’s relief. He knew about Hamilton’s streaks of insomnia, and he did _not_ need to deal with that on top of everything else.

“That’s because you decided to be an irresponsible petulant child who is now drunk off his ass, and I haven’t the slightest clue or care as to where you live.”

Thomas sat the man down on his sofa, before taking out his phone and going to dial Peggy's number. That was when he remembered that she was still on vacation in California, or someplace like that.

Jefferson weighed his options out. He wasn’t really tired, but Hamilton obviously was. The option of letting him just sleep on the couch screamed out to him, but he felt that if he wasn’t going to be using his bed, it might as well go to the use of someone else. Even if that someone else happened to have a ninety-five percent chance of vomiting all over the duvet during the night. 

So, that was why Thomas found himself carrying Alexander to his bedroom. He unceremoniously dropped him on the bed; it wasn’t as if he was going to go far enough as to tuck him in. Thomas Jefferson would be caught dead before caught tucking _Alexander Hamilton_ into bed.

“You can sleep in here tonight.” He left Hamilton’s phone (now turned on) on the nightstand, and then without another word, Thomas left, grabbing his laptop on his way out. He had a lot of work to be done, and with Hamilton asleep in the other room, he knew that he would be getting more done than his counterpart was.


	2. take a break

When Alexander woke, he had no earthly idea of where he was. One thing he did know, however, was that he must have drunk a lot the night before. His head was pounding and whatever was in his stomach felt like it would soon expel itself from his body.

He looked around, trying to find something that would jog his memory, that would tell him where he was. The only thing he found of his was his phone, of which he immediately grabbed.

The light hit his face and only made his head hurt worse. He quickly turned the brightness down and blanched when he saw the time. Oh, he was so late for work.

He ignored the unread texts and got up out of the bed. However, he didn’t take into account his hangover, and soon was rushing to try and find a bathroom before his stomach contents made an unwanted appearance.

Luckily, he found an ensuite connected to the room. He took care of the business needed and went back about to trying to get ready to leave.

He was still in his previous day’s attire, and it would have to do, seeing as he didn’t know where he was. The likelihood of finding clothes was slim to none.

He grabbed his phone and pocketed, ignoring his stabbing headache as he left apartment and apartment complex, hailing a cab as he did so.

While Hamilton sat in the back of the cab, he opened his phone for more than a few seconds, going through his text messages being his first priority.

 **Laurens:** Alex, I’m sorry, you know I was being rash  
**Laurens:** Where are you?  
**Laurens:** Herc and Laf said you aren’t with them, please tell me you aren’t drinking.  
**Laurens:** Alex, please come home  
**Laurens:** Don’t make any bad decisions.

 **Mercules Hulligan:** Hey, John sounds worried ‘bout you. Everything good?

 **Le Meilleur:** Mon ami, où es-tu?

 **best of wives:** we have so much to talk about !!

 **jeffershithead:** Don’t bother coming in today. Sleep or something, dumbass.

The last text confused Hamilton more than anything else. Of course, John tried to get their friends involved in something that they didn’t need to be, that made sense, he always did. But why the hell was Jefferson texting him?

He pushed all thoughts from his mind as the cab pulled up to the White House. He gave the cabbie his fare (luckily his wallet was still on him) and bid him a good day, before all but running up to the entrance gates.

He was inside within ten minutes, a new record for getting through security. He walked briskly towards his office, hoping that no one would see him and try to engage in conversation. There was too much work he missed, too many things that he needed to get done. Of course, today’s work was already done, as was his work for a good while, but this was America; things could change at the drop of a hairpin.

He was only stopped when he got to his office door and was in the midst of opening it.

“It’s good to see that you’re late, Alex.” The cheerful voice of Eliza spoke from behind him.

“No, it’s not.” He shook his head and opened the door. “I have so much to be done, I will be staying late tonight.”

Even though he wasn’t facing her, he knew that Eliza rolled her eyes. It was such a typical response when it came to people communicating with him. She followed him inside his office, much to his dismay. He really just wanted to work; his headache was slowly getting worse and people weren’t going to make it better.

“You could probably go home early, and still be further ahead than anyone else.” Eliza sat down in the chair across from his desk. “You could honestly take off two months, and still be further ahead.”

“You know, clouds and people have one thing in common- the day is brighter when they go away.” Alexander took the hair tie that was sitting on his desk and pulled back his hair; he really needed to cut it soon. “Now don’t you have other things to be doing that involve not being here?”

Eliza smirked at him and leaned back a bit in her chair. “I definitely do. But that doesn't change the fact that your friends are worried about you. At least text Lafayette back, you don’t need to talk to John or Hercules if you don’t want to.”

“I don’t very well have to do anything I don’t want to.” He remarked but got out his phone nonetheless.

 **To: Le Meilleur:** Au boulot maintenant. Pourquoi?

He put his phone on the far edge of his desk and went about turning his laptop on and looking through the papers scattered around the desktop area. “Why are you still here, Eliza?”

She leaned forward and looked at him eagerly. “I want to know all the dirty details about where you were last night.”

“The same bar I always frequent.” He logged into his laptop while speaking. “Woke up in an unknown apartment, no one was there. Don’t really remember much of my night, it seems that whiskey became my best friend, once again. Are you done?”

“You should really stop drinking as much as you do, Alex.” Her tone turned softer, almost concerned. “It’s really dangerous for you to drink that much. You could kill yourself by drinking too much, you know that, right?”

Alexander gave out a small laugh. “I am more than aware of that fact. Did anything change in the last fifteen hours that I should know about?”

“Well, Angelica got a cat.” Eliza shrugged. “About the country, though? No, you are still nearly three months ahead in work and you’re still making everyone else look bad.”

“Are there any other reasons that you are here?” He opened a new tab and went directly to his email.

Elza didn’t answer his question and instead stood up. “See you later, Alex. I’m sure there’ll be more reasons throughout the day for me to grace you with my wonderful presence.”

Alex followed her, going to shut the door behind her. As he was shutting it though, she turned back around saying, "Wait, what do you mean that you don't know where you woke up?"

"I'll talk to you later, Eliza." He shut the door and turned back to his desk.

His phone vibrated on the edge of his desk, and he picked it up, knowing that it would probably be the last time he would respond to anyone for at least a few hours. While he looked at his new message, he sat back down in his swivel chair.

 **Le Meilleur:** John said you didn’t come home last night, mon cher. Is everything good?

 **To: Le Meilleur:** I’ll talk to you later.

He put the phone back on the edge of his desk, now on silent. He read the few emails he had gotten from the time he had left yesterday and now, and then went to Google Drive. He opened up a new document, ready to start writing more on the Puerto Rico debt crisis when yet another unwanted person greeted him with his presence, this person perhaps more unwanted than anyone else in the building.

“Are you just too ignorant to read a text or too arrogant to follow directions?” Jefferson drawled from the doorway.

“You’re one to talk.” Hamilton internally groaned; he would have rathered anyone else speaking to him than Jefferson. “Besides, who are you to tell me what to do? You’re not my mother, I don’t need your help or whatever you think that text was.”

A sneer appeared on Jefferson’s face, but then again, it was rare to see him without one. “Really? You don’t think you need my help? It seems last night you were telling me those same words, while you were busy making a fool of yourself in a public bar.”

He racked his brain for what Jefferson possibly could have been talking about but came up blank. The only explanation for what he was saying was that it was Jefferson’s apartment he woke up it, but there was no way that he would have helped Hamilton unless it was benefitting him.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“If it weren’t for me, you would still be in that bar, probably dead.”

Jefferson turned to leave, but then remembered what he had actually come to tell Hamilton; contrary to popular belief, sometimes there was reasoning to talking to him, not just poking fun at whatever areas he could.

“Washington wants to see you.” He threw one last glare before leaving the office, not bothering to close the door.

Hamilton fought the urge to see how many times he had to bang his head on his desk to go unconscious and shut his laptop. He pocketed his phone and left his office, with the door closed and locked, wanting to get the meeting over with. It probably wouldn’t last long, Washington wasn’t a man of many words, but any time not writing was more time wasted in his already off-kilter day.

He knocked sharply on the office door, waiting for a response before walking in. He wasn’t in the least bit surprised to see Jefferson there, the man couldn’t stand not sticking his nose in everything. Although, there were a few places that Alexander wouldn't mind Jefferson stic- no, he was not going down that train of thought. At least, not right now.

“Mr. President.” He greeted with a nod of his head. His voice was laced with sarcasm, however, as he greeted Jefferson. “Mr. Secretary.”

“Hamilton.” Washington didn’t look happy in the slightest, which immediately began to worry the man.

“You asked to see me?” He cautiously walked past Jefferson, who was leaning lazily against the wall with his arms crossed.

Washington sighed and shook his head slightly. “You are getting way too out of hand, Alexander.”

“What do you mean?” He chose his words carefully, knowing that whatever he said would most likely be used against him by Jefferson in any given debate.

“You work yourself nearly to death every day, everyone sees that. But now it has come to my attention that you are also drinking yourself nearly to death.” Washington pinched the bridge of his nose. “Your work is tremendous, there is no denying that. You pour yourself into it. Not to mention, you’re at least a month ahead in your work-”

“Well I hoped to be further, but-” He tried to correct, only for Washington to cut him off.

“Even the more reason for this. I can’t have my staff staying here for twelve to sixteen hours straight on average and then getting trashed for whatever hours are left in the day. Secretary Jefferson here has reported your actions of last night, drinking until you cannot have another drink without getting alcohol poisoning, or something along those lines is not acceptable. Alexander, I’d like for you to take a break, for at least for a few weeks.”

Hamilton shook his head vigorously. “No, Mr. President, you can’t do this. I can get better, it’s something I have control of, I can stop at any time. You can’t do this, my work is my life.”

“Might I remind you, Hamilton, that he can do this because he _is_ the president.” Jefferson’s eyes seemed to light up at the prospect of not having to deal with Hamilton, at least that's what Alexander saw it as. “Mr. President, might I suggest him taking a residence up at Monticello for this time? It is a perfect location, away from all government forms and in the middle of nowhere.”

He wouldn’t have been offering up his home to Hamilton if it didn’t mean that he would be over one hundred miles away from him.

“I think that would be a great place for him.” Washington agreed. “In fact, why don't you take the break as well. It would give the two of you the perfect opportunity to work out your differences- it might actually make cabinet meetings bearable.”

“What?” Jefferson asked as if that mindset hadn't been the exact reasoning for him suggesting Monticello. Now, he knew that he couldn't get his hopes up too high for anything spectacular to happen, but he could try his hardest to at least mend a bit of a bond between them.

“There is no way that I am spending a month and a half alone with him!” Hamilton protested, “Let alone in his home! He is already a pompous ass while we’re here, it’ll just get worse when we’re alone! Hell, there’s no way I’m even agreeing to this break!”

“Sir, I can’t take this break.” Jefferson tried to act as if he was opposed as well. “There is far too much going on here.”

“You both will be taking a break, whether you agree with it or not.” Washington’s tone of voice meant that the decision was final. “As soon as you are done in my office, you are to get your belongings you will need for the time being and leave the building. Tomorrow, since Secretary Jefferson so graciously offered, you both will be heading up to Monticello. This is nonnegotiable.”


	3. let it go

“Calme-vous, mon chéri,” Lafayette spoke from where he sat on their couch, his voice holding amusement.

“How am I supposed to?” Hamilton exclaimed. He had been pacing for what seemed to be an eternity, and it was starting to get on the Frenchman’s nerves. “Washington wants me to take a break. With _Jefferson_. The little infuriating piece of shit went and blabbed about me drinking, and I still don’t have any idea what happened last night! He knows something I don’t, which means he can use it as leverage. Not to mention-”

“Shut up already.” He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. “I’ve heard your rants about Thomas enough to know that you hate him- or tu aime l’homme.”

“I do not!” Alexander yelled. “The emotions I feel for him are so far from love-”

Lafayette picked up his phone to respond to whatever texts were causing the light to blink, ignoring his best friend’s rant.

 **Angelica Schuyler:** hope Alexander knows that we’re all still coming over, even if he and john are pissed with each other  
**To: Angelica Schuyler:** He’ll fight it if he knows about it. He can figure it out himself.

“-and why would I love such an arrogant dick bag? How could anyone love him? He’s one of the worst people I can think about!”

“Watch your words,” He warned, “you may be my best friend, mais il est aussi mon ami. You need to calm down.”

“Calm?” The other man stopped pacing. “I am nothing but calm at all times.”

“No you’re not; you’re fifteen seconds away from starting a fight at all times. Especially at this moment.”

Alexander ran a hand through his hair, the ponytail having been let down earlier. There was no way that he would survive the time away from work, let alone with Jefferson. Sure, there ought to be many places that he could get away from him in such a large place, but just being in the same house as him for more than a few hours makes him feel sick. Sick and irritated beyond belief.

“Have you ever considered,” Lafayette spoke rather slowly, “just not abiding by it?”

Hamilton’s mind stopped for a moment. Millisecond, really, but the slight pause was still there. “What do you mean?”

“You don’t _have_ to go to Monticello. You’re a grown ass man, you control where you go. And, I’m sure you could even find a way to get around the break. Knowing you, you’ve already thought of ways to get around it.”

Lafayette watched as his eyes lit up like a child on Christmas morning. Hamilton all but skipped up to where Lafayette was sitting and placed a kiss on his cheek. “You’re brilliant!”

“As-tu vraiment pas pensé?” His tone was amused.

“Too busy being mad at Jefferson.” He beamed at his friend. “It’s too easy to be mad at him; it’s all his fault, everything is always his fault. But you’re right! I don’t have to go to Monticello!”

 **To: Angelica Schuyler, herc:** I’d hurry up and get here while Alex is still in a good mood.  
**Angelica Schuyler:** we’ll be there soon. We had to stop and pick up Eliza.  
**herc:** It took a little convincing with John, but we’ll be there. Aaron is coming, as well.

Lafayette put his phone in his pocket, figuring he wouldn’t really need it. Alexander was still listing off all of the things he could do during his break- most things still government related- now that he realized he did not have to go to Monticello.

“Nos amis seront bientôt ici,” Lafayette gently said, pushing himself up off of the couch, “I’m going to grab blankets, you order pizza or some sort of other food.”

He let his friend process the fact that their friends would still be joining them for the night; it wasn’t unlike any other Friday night just because two of them had a falling out. They’d get over it.

He went to the hallway closet and pulled out the few blankets they kept in there. Then, he went into Alexander’s bedroom, pulling all of the blankets out from there. He tried to keep the mess out of his mind as he then grabbed the blankets from the guest bedroom and his own bedroom. He deposited them all in the living room and then went to join Alexander, who had moved into the kitchen.

“How much pizza will we need?” His voice wasn’t as happy as it had been, but it also wasn’t as pissed as it was earlier, so Lafayette counted that as a plus.

“Get two large pizzas and some breadsticks.” Hamilton nodded and repeated the order to the lady on the phone, with one pepperoni and one cheese.

He hung up after giving her the address and excused himself to the bathroom. He walked around all of the blankets in the living room and as he got to the bathroom, he heard a knock at the front door, but he didn’t go back to get it.

He locked the door and looked in the mirror. He looked like a mess, he did not want John to see him as a mess. Didn’t want John to look at him and think all of his stress was from the angry words shouted at him the day before. Didn’t want to give him that satisfaction.

He splashed a little water on his face. He grabbed the nearest hairbrush, probably one of Lafayette’s, and brushed through his hair. He then put it up into a messy bun on his head, not unlike one he would usually wear. Alexander gave himself a smile in the mirror, putting positive thoughts into his head, such as how he wouldn’t have to deal with Jefferson for the next month and a half like he previously thought. No, instead the bane of his existence would be in Monticello, not being a bother to Hamilton, while he enjoyed his break doing what he loved most- work.

He exited the bathroom with a confidence he wouldn’t have had without his almost-pep talk. On the couch was Angelica, Eliza, and Maria, chatting happily with Lafayette.

“Hey, Alex!” Angelica happily greeted, not expecting Hamilton’s face to be as cheerful as it was.

“Hey!” He greeted back, sitting on the arm of the chair Lafayette was in. “How are you all?”

Maria smirked as she said, “I think Eliza and I are both good, whereas the whole ride here Angelica was complaining about how Aaron wasn’t going to be here. I don’t know about you guys, but sounds like she has a crush.”

Angelica’s face turned slightly pink as she denied the statement. The other two girls teased her and Lafayette turned to Hamilton with a knowing smile on his face, “En fait, les autres prit sur leur chemin.”

Alex replied with a devious smile, “Je pense que les deux d'entre eux peut accidentellement finissent dans une chambre seule les uns avec les autres.”

“It’s unfair that you two always speak in French when we don’t understand you,” Angelica remarked.

“Penses-tu que Aaron câline?” Lafayette inquired, looking directly at her as he did, amusement evident in his voice.

“Je sais qu'il ne,” Alex responded. Angelica huffed indignantly, not liking when she didn’t know things.

Another knock sounded at the door, and Alex stood up from where he was perched on the armchair. “That’s either pizza or the others.”

“Ooh, pizza?” Eliza mocked. “You really splurged, didn’t you?”

Alex flipped her off as he opened the door. Hercules, Aaron, and John stood at the doorway, John looking a bit worse for wear.

“Hey, guys! Come on in!” Alex said, maybe a tad too cheerful, but he didn’t care.

He closed the door behind them all and went back to the chair, this time sitting in front of it instead of on the arm.

“You said he wasn’t going to be here!” Angelica hissed at her sister, who only shrugged.

“Did we miss any good conversations?” Hercules asked as he sat down on the loveseat. “Not that you guys have really had much time to make any.”

“Well, we’ve established that Angelica has a crush on Aaron,” Maria informed him.

Angelica and Aaron’s eyes both grew wide as she said that. Eliza laughed a little bit and leaned more into Maria’s side, and Hercules just rolled his eyes.

“Finally, Aaron has had a thing for her for _ever._ ”

“Hey! Shut up, would you?” Aaron shot daggers at him, but he just laughed it off.

John had sat on the loveseat next to Hercules and seemed to be looking everywhere else in the room but Alex. He didn’t really notice, he was much too engrossed in Lafayette's unconscious playing with his hair.

“So, Alex,” Angelica spoke, wanting to change the topic as soon as she could, “rumor has it that Washington is making you take a break with Jefferson?”

He nodded in affirmation. “Yes, but I’m not going to. Laf reminded me that I’m a grown ass man and I don’t have to spend time with this man that I hate just because I think I have to. I am still technically going to be on break, but I’ll still be working. I mean, why wouldn’t I spend my break doing something I love? And besides-”

The group all seemed to let out a sigh of relief when the pizza arrived, the delivery person’s knocking interrupting Alex’s rant.

Alex got up to answer the door, missing Eliza whisper to Maria, "He could be spending his break doing _someone_ he loves."

Maria snickered at that as Alex called over his shoulder to his friend’s, “Can I get some help?”

John immediately moved, almost tripping over himself to join Alex at the door. Alex handed him the pizza without a word before paying the girl and thanking her. John brought it into the kitchen, trying not to be hurt that Alex wouldn’t even talk to him, knowing that he deserved every bit of the silent treatment.

Alex leaned against the counter as everyone got their food. “I hope a Bob’s Burgers marathon is good with everyone because it’s easier than arguing over a movie. Who wants to sleep next to who?”

“I’m with you, mon ami?” Lafayette asked, lifting an eyebrow up as he did so.

“Of course.” Alex reaffirmed, and then looked back at his friends. The only one who wore a confused expression was Aaron; everyone else knew that Alex wasn’t speaking to John, meaning that they wouldn’t be sleeping next to each other as usual.

“Dibs on Eliza.” Maria snaked an arm around Eliza as she spoke, pulling her closer.

“Well, you’re dating each other, so that’d make the most sense.” Hercules snorted. “Laurens, you can sleep by me if you’d like.”

John nodded, focusing on his pizza instead of everyone around him.

“Which leaves Aaron and Angelica,” Lafayette wiggled his eyebrows, “the tourtereaux will sleep by each other then.”

Aaron’s face turned red and Angelica glared at Lafayette. Not that her heart wasn’t doing flips at the prospect of getting to sleep by Aaron, but she knew that he and Alex had to have set something up.

“Alex, are you not going to eat?” Eliza questioned, noticing that everyone had a plate in hand, but him.

He ignored her question and gave a smile to the group. “I’m going to go set up the living room.”

He exited the kitchen and went into the living room, turning on the television before he did anything else. He switched it over to Netflix and while he was waiting for it to load, he pushed the sofa back, making room for some people to lay on the floor. He put a few layers of blankets on the ground so that the people laying on the ground wouldn’t be directly on the floor, and then left a few more blankets in piles to use to cover their bodies. He took the throw pillows off of the sofa and scattered them on the floor.

He pressed on Bob’s Burgers and put the remaining blankets on the loveseat and couch. By the time he was finished with it all, the rest of the group was trickling in to join him. They all looked like they were hiding something, but Alex didn’t worry about it; if it was something of importance, Lafayette would tell him. Even if it wasn’t, Alex would still get it out of his friend.

“Hercules, you two can take the loveseat as it reclines in both seats.” Alex pointed out the spaces as he talked. “Laf and I can take half of the floor, Eliza and Maria, you two can take the other half as I’m sure you two will be too wrapped up in each other to care. And Aaron, Angelica, it’s gonna be a tight squeeze on the couch, but I’m sure cuddling isn’t past either of you.”

Lafayette and Eliza both laughed, knowing that Alex had done it on purpose. Everyone headed to their designated spots, and someone turned off the lights in the process.

When he laid down, Alex took out his phone, knowing that he needed to make one last text for the night.

 **To: jeffershithead:** I won’t be accompanying you to Monticello. You are far too much of a dickbag for me to want to spend any more time with you than necessary.

When Thomas received the text he rolled his eyes but felt a little sting. Leave it to Hamilton to not only come up with an insult such as dickbag, but also make it hurt.


	4. i'll stay awake

It wasn’t until three in the morning that Alexander decided sleep wasn’t in his near future.

Around him, his friends’ soft snores told him that they were asleep. He had looked around the living room a few times throughout the night, and the ones that didn’t snore seemed to be asleep, so he was alone in being awake.

One of the things that he had forgotten before saying he’d sleep next to Lafayette was that his best friend was very cuddly. He had a strong arm over Alex, pinning him to his chest, and his face was pressed into Alex’s back.

Alex tried to carefully move Lafayette’s arm from around him, but the grip only tightened. He came to the conclusion that the only way he’d be able to be freed is by waking up the Frenchman, so he did just that.

“Laf,” He whispered, not wanting to wake the others up, “wake up, you baguette fucker.”

He was able to turn his body enough that was needed to shake him. He shook Lafayette rather harshly until he slowly started blinking back into consciousness.

“Rendors-tu, putain.” Lafayette sleepily muttered.

Ignoring the fact that he called Alex a whore, he responded, “S'il tu plaît laisser aller de moi, l’amour.”

The grip was loosened and Alex wiggled his way out of it. He grabbed his phone from where he set it the night before and stood up to leave the room.

“Where is it you’re going?” Alex was impressed; even though the phrasing wasn’t the best, Lafayette normally didn’t speak English until he’d had some sort of caffeine.

“I think I’ll take a walk,” he whispered back, “probably do some work.”

Lafayette turned over on his other side, already falling back to sleep. “Soyez prudent, ami.”

Alex carefully walked around everyone, being extra cautious as he walked around Eliza and Maria. He slipped into his shoes by the door and shrugged on his jacket, just in case it was chilly outside. He took the keys off of the coat rack and quietly shut the door behind him as he left the apartment.

The sound of a door closing brought John out of the light sleep he was enduring. It had taken a while for him to get to sleep, it was just his luck that the slightest noise woke him up.

He turned on his phone, squinting at the bright light. The phone’s clock read 03:24, leaving John to wonder who was opening doors that early in the morning?

None of the other apartment lights were on, so whoever had gotten up had left the apartment. He looked around, wanting to know which of his friends it was, and of course, it was Alexander. Who else would be crazy enough to get up that early?

 _Now would be the perfect time to try to talk to him_ , John thought to himself.

Even though it was an ungodly time in the morning, John realized that he most likely wouldn’t get any other time to speak to him rationally, every other time he would have somewhere to avoid the conversation or someone else to talk to. That was why not ten minutes later, John found himself exiting the apartment and jogging down the stairs, his mind now fully awake and reeling with what he needed to say to Alex.

When he got outside, the first thing he noticed was that Alex was sitting on the steps, _smoking_. As far as he knew, Alex had quit smoking, Alex had quit smoking seven months ago and was doing well. Not that he didn’t have other bad habits that he kept up on, but he was doing well with not smoking.

Alex looked at him for only a moment, before taking another drag of his cigarette. “You should be sleeping, John.”

John found himself rolling his eyes at the irony. “As should you, Alexander.”

John sat down next to Alex on the steps. He didn’t sit as close to him as he would’ve, say a week ago, but it was close enough given the circumstances.

“I thought you weren’t smoking anymore.”

Alex blew the smoke from his mouth, blowing a smoke ring for the hell of it. “Things change.”

“It’s a bad habit.” John was observing him closely, not wanting to further upset him that he already had in the past few days.

Alex laughed a harsh laugh, void of any humor, or emotion really, in it. “Yes, as is stooping as low as to insult someone’s dead mother. I do hope you aren’t going to make a habit of that, John.”

Alex didn’t wait for a response to his comment, instead, he stomped out his cigarette and stood up. He began walking down the steps. He had come outside to take a walk and he was very well going to do so.

“If you would like to continue this conversation then you are going to have to walk with me.”

John immediately got up from his spot and hustled down, probably faster than needed, to join Alex. As they began walking, the silence around him told him that although Alex very rarely shut up, this would be a conversation weighing completely on him. This was his fault, after all. He needed to fix it himself.

“There’s a park around here, can we stop there?” John asked. He needed to be looking at his friend while he talked, and it was rather hard to do that while still walking in a straight line. Alex gave him a sharp nod as a response.

John pulled them off to one of the benches when they reached the park. Neither of them sat and Alex crossed his arms over his chest, waiting to hear what John had to say.

“First of all, I want to say that I am sorry,” John’s voice was stronger than he was expecting, “I shouldn’t have said the things about yo-”

Alex cut him off, fire in his eyes. “Okay, no. John, you are not going to stand here and tell me that you shouldn’t have said what you did about my mother because that should be fucking obvious. You had no right to bring my  _dead mother_ into our argument, and yet you did. You had no right to say any of those things, and but if that’s what you’re going to apologize for, then you should stop trying now because I don’t know if I can forgive any of that.”

John ran a hand through his hair and sighed. This was going to be harder than he thought.

“Then what do you want me to apologize for, Alexander? As far as I know, what I said was what I needed to apologize and make up for.”

“Are you serious?” Alex looked at him in disbelief. “Do you really think that the words concerning my mother are what hurt me this deep? Yes, they hurt plenty. But you are not the first one to say those things, and you will not be the last.”

He closed the distance between him and John, walking up until their chests were practically touching. “John, it hurts me to think of the other things you said. We have been together for nearly a year and a half, and you have the audacity to tell me that I don’t love you? We’ve been friends even longer, and you still had the nerve to call me a sociopath who loves no one but himself? John, that cuts me deep, and frankly, if you think that there’s nothing wrong with _that_ part of our argument, then you need to rethink.”

“That’s just the thing, though!” John backed up from Alexander, wanting more space between them. “We aren’t _together_ , Alexander! Every time I call you my boyfriend, you say we aren’t dating. Every time someone asks if I’m your significant other, you say we’re just friends. Even when we go on dates! How am I to think that you love me when you show no signs of it?”

“To be fair, I asked you to be my boyfriend the first month of us going on dates together.” Alex was starting to get angry, it was evident in the way he was raising his voice. “You told me no which made me assume that you didn’t want to be my boyfriend! It’s not like you’ve ever asked me to be your boyfriend because I would’ve said yes in a heartbeat!

“And what do you mean I show no signs? On top of  _saying_ I love you multiple times a day, I show you as well as I can! There are more ways to saying and showing I love you, and I try to do the most I can for you, John! How can you seriously not see that? Do you really not consider us together?”

John racked his brain for a response, not knowing how to respond to everything. He wanted, no, he _needed_ , to show Alex he was sorry, but had no idea how.

“Alex,” his voice was much quieter than he intended it to be, “sometimes it’s really hard to consider us together when it doesn’t seem like we are.”

“Then I don’t know what to tell you.” Alex’s voice quieted as well and he nervously tugged on a piece of hair that fell from his bun.

An idea struck John, and he was surprised that he hadn’t thought of it already. “I have reservations tomorrow night at a nice restaurant uptown. I had made them prior to all of this happening. Will you please come with me? If everything goes well, then we can put this all behind us and be proper boyfriends.”

“And what if it doesn’t go well?” Alex’s voice had suddenly changed from angry and sad, almost instantaneously. “I can’t lose you completely, I need to know that you’ll still be in my life.”

John took Alex’s hand and looked into his eyes. “If it doesn’t go well, then I’ll always be your best friend, I promise. But don’t think like that, it’ll go wonderfully, I promise.”

Alex took a deep breath and nodded. John pulled him into a hug, only breaking away when he felt Alex’s phone buzz. “You should probably see who that is; not many people message others at four in the morning.”

Alex chuckled and took out his phone, wondering if maybe one of their friends had woken up and wanted to know where they were. It was one of their friends, but not one that had come over.

 **pegs:** who the frick has a fight in the middle of a public park at night?  
**To: pegs:** I’m guessing you’re home from California?  
**pegs:** indeed i am. want to come by after your lover's quarrel with laurens? i can’t sleep.

Alex pocketed his phone again. He pulled his keys out of his pocket and offered them to John.

“There’s somewhere I need to stop by. You can head back to the apartment, I’ll see you for our date?”

John took the keys cautiously. “I’ll come pick you up at seven. Please don’t go out drinking, Alex.”

“I won’t, I have self-control, you know.” Alex started off in the direction of Peggy’s apartment. “Tell the Schuyler sisters that they’re still on for shopping today.”

John didn’t respond and the next time Alex looked behind him, he was well on his way back to the apartment. It wasn’t long until Alex got to Peggy’s apartment; he truly didn’t realize just how close the park was to her place.

John’s comment about drinking made Alex remember something; he still had no clue where it was that he woke up. Maybe that could be an activity he and Peggy could do. There was one thing that made him and Peggy bond more than anyone else in their friend group. They were both insomniacs. Most often, when neither of them could sleep and Alex wasn’t working, they found little things to go investigate around town.

Alex knocked on the door and almost immediately Peggy was opening it and hugging him.

“Alex!” She happily said, trying to pull him into her apartment.

“Peggy!” He responded with just as much enthusiasm. “I have a job for us.”

She pulled away with a smile on her face and Alex got a good look at her. California had been good for her. She had gone only because Alex wouldn’t shut up about her not going, and he was glad she eventually took his advice and went. She looked almost the same as when she left, minus the fact that she looked a lot happier and-

“Your hair.” Alex furrowed his eyebrows together. “Do your sisters know?”

She laughed, twirling a strand of her purple hair around her finger. “I got back three hours ago, you’re the first person I’ve seen, and thus the first person who has seen my hair. Minus Stephen, of course. So, what’s the job?”

She shut the door behind her and they began walking in the direction Alex was taking them.

“Well, I got drunk off of my ass two days ago.” He began, talking over her when she began to protest his drinking habits. “I woke up in an apartment belonging to someone I don’t know, I still have no clue where I was. No one was there when I woke up. I don’t remember most of the night, either. We’re gonna go figure out where I was.”

“I don’t agree to your drinking,” Peggy spoke, “but I am more than happy to help you find out where you were. What bar were you drinking at?”

“The one I usually go to. Nellie’s Sports Bar, I believe. Something like that.”

“Oh!” Peggy’s excitement returned. “I know where that one is! It’s actually really close to here!”

She took his hand and practically dragged him to the bar. When they got to it, Alex nodded. “Yeah, this is the one.”

Peggy opened the door and the two of them walked in. Upon seeing who entered, the bartender paled slightly.

“Sir, I’m really sorry to tell you this, but I can’t serve you.”

The bar was practically empty, apart from a couple making out in the corner. That was why Alex normally went to this one; not many people to judge their country’s Secretary of Treasury getting wasted.

“I’m not here to order,” Alex said, confusion evident in his voice, “but why can’t you serve me?”

He and Peggy walked up to the counter. The bartender avoided eye contact with both of them and tried to focus on everything that wasn’t them.

“I was just told that I can’t serve you anymore, Mr. Hamilton.”

Peggy leaned forward onto the counter, her eyebrow raised slightly in interest. “Who told you that you can’t serve Alex anymore?”

He finally looked at them, a small amount of fear showing in his eyes. “I don’t know his name, he was the guy in here that helped Mr. Hamilton home the other night. He had a darker complexion and his hair was curly. He wore glasses when he came in the second time, but when he was helping Mr. Hamilton home he wasn’t wearing glasses. He looked familiar, but I don’t know, I don’t even know if I’m supposed to be telling you any of this. Just get out of my bar.”

Peggy and Alex followed his request, not asking for any more information before leaving. They were outside again before either of them spoke.

“I have an idea of who it might be, but you aren’t going to like it.” Peggy told him, “Before I suggest him, though, do you remember the name of the neighborhood or apartment complex of where you were?”

“It was like View 14 or something like that.” Alex shrugged. He had seen the name on the way out but didn’t really think much else of it.

“Mhm.”  Peggy mused, now knowing exactly who it was. “You aren’t going to like it, but I have a friend who lives in that complex and fits the description to the tee.”

“Who is it?” He asked, wanting to know more than anything.

“Thomas Jefferson.”


	5. what gender binary

Alex laughed at her suggestion. “No, really Pegs. Who?”

“I’m being serious, Alex.” She looked at him with complete honesty in her face. “He and I have been friends for a while, he used to try to get with Angelica and he was a pretty good conversationalist. I’ve been over to his apartment a few times, and he lives on one of the top floors in View 14.”

“No, there’s no way.” The time was almost five now, and Alexander knew that they’d be walking at least until six thirty. There was plenty of time to change Peggy’s mind on her belief that it was Jefferson. “He hates me, he’d probably let me drink myself to death before letting me anywhere near his apartment.”

Peggy suddenly turned around, heading back in the direction of the bar. Alex turned around too, but not sure why. “Where are we going?”

“You’ll see.” Peggy took out her phone and opened up a new message.

 **To: thomas:** unlock your door, you’re going to have company in like fifteen minutes.

Alex continued to walk with her, even if he was starting to wonder if she was losing her mind. They walked in silence until they reached their destination, a destination that Alex really did not want to be at.

“Why are we here?” He asked Peggy, still following along as they went inside and to the elevator.

“So I can prove a point.” She shrugged, getting inside the elevator when it arrived.

“You’ve been spending too much time with me.” He told her, but still followed obediently when the elevator reached the floor she wanted. He would never pass up an opportunity to show someone they were wrong, especially where Jefferson was involved.

“Is any of this looking familiar?” She questioned as they came up to a door.

Alex shook his head. “I was trying to get out of here as soon as possible because I was late to work. I wasn’t really paying attention to my surroundings.”

Peggy opened the door without knocking, unsurprised that even though it was five in the morning, Thomas still did what she asked without asking why. He probably thought Angelica was coming over.

Thomas was sitting on the couch, eyeing the pair confusedly. Why they were here at five thirty in the morning was baffling him. He was still in his pajamas (which normally consisted of nothing, but neither Peggy nor Alexander would know that, considering he pulled on a pair of sleep pants) and he was tired beyond belief, but he’d do just about anything when it came to Peggy.

“Morning Thomas!” Peggy greeted cheerfully, her purple hair bouncing as she waved.

“Morning, Peggy.” He sounded just as tired as he looked as he halfheartedly waved back. He then nodded towards Alex. “Hamilton.”

“Jefferson.” He returned the nod.

“Why are you in my apartment?” Thomas questioned them, and Alex turned to Peggy, letting her explain since it was her idea.

“Thomas,” She was now bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet, “were you or were you not the one to help Alex from the bar and did you or did you not let him sleep here?”

Jefferson let out a loud yawn before answering her. “I was and I did. I wasn’t just going to let him drink himself to death.”

Peggy turned to Alex, who looked as if his mind had been blown. She poked him in the chest but was still smiling. “I told you so, Alex!”

“But, Thomas, you hate me.” Alex was trying to wrap his head around it. “Why would you help me when you hate me so much?”

“Do you really think I hate you?” He questioned. “I don’t hate you, I’ve never hated you. Also, don’t call me Thomas, that’s reserved for people who aren’t you.”

“See! Things like that just make me think you hate me even more! There must be an alternative reason as to why you-”

Alex was cut off by a meow that was connected to a cat brushing up against him. He looked down at the cat, then back at Thomas, then back at the cat again. “You have a cat?”

“Obviously, moron, I didn’t just pick up a cat off of the streets.” Thomas fought another yawn as he looked back at the smiling Peggy. “Is that all you came here to ask?”

“Well, I have another question, but I don’t know if I’m going to ask it or not.” She looked down at the cat that was still brushing up against Alex. “I thought you did find Alexander on the streets?”

Both men looked at her, one with confusion on his face and the other with a look telling her not to keep talking.

“You can't have a cat, only good people have cats.” Alex’s eyebrows were furrowed together as he tried to figure out the situation. "Your cat's name is Alexander?"

“What is your other question, Peggy?” Thomas asked, trying to change the subject as soon as possible.

“Yes, Alex, the cat is named Alexander,” Peggy confirmed before she turned back to Thomas. “Would you like to join our shopping trip today? Angelica suggested inviting you because you love clothes as much as they do.”

Now it was Alex’s turn to look at Peggy like he wanted her to quit talking. Thomas saw this look on his face and knew, if something was making Alexander uncomfortable, he had to do it.

“I think that that would be lovely, thank you for inviting me.” Thomas’ sleepiness was slowly going away with the two of them being here.

“Jefferson, aren’t you leaving for Monticello today?” Alex reminded, his voice rather harsh.

“Actually, Hamilton, since I don’t have to babysit you, I've decided I won't be going.” Thomas smiled, hiding the slight dismay that he wasn't going to be able to spend the time alone with Alexander.

Peggy watched the two of them bicker back and forth for another ten minutes until she took out her phone. Angelica wanted to leave by six thirty, and she had two missed texts from her.

 **angie !!:** alex isn’t answering his texts, but john says he’s going? i don’t know, alex wasn’t here when i woke up, though  
**angie !!:** answer pls!! you never texted to tell us if you landed alright and if you’re still coming with us today  
**To: angie !!:** alex is with me, we’re both still going. so it thomas, we’re actually at his apartment, so if you’re driving, now you know  
**To: angie !!:** also, since thomas is going, operation get them together is a go  
**angie !!:** i never agreed to this operation

“Thomas, I’m guessing you don’t want to wear that out and about.” Peggy said while she was pocketing her phone. “You should probably go get on clothes soon because it’s five fifty and Angelica wants to leave by six thirty. Also, can you lend Alex some clothes?”

“No way am I wearing his clothes.” Alex immediately said.

“No way are you wearing those clothes for the third day in a row.” Thomas quipped back. “I’ll go find him something.”

As soon as he was out of sight, Alex was shooting daggers at Peggy. “Why did you invite him?”

“So you could have another guy there.” She wasn’t paying attention to him, instead, she was walking to the couch to sit down. “Plus, I’m hoping that you’ll admit your feelings and fall in love with Thomas sometime soon and finally be over John, because no offense, but you guys’ relationship just doesn’t work.”

Alex was about to make a comment about how that’ll never happen and how his relationship is fine when the cat meowed again. He bent over to pick it up, scratching it behind its ears.

“Is its name seriously Alexander?” He questioned once again.

She nodded. “Yeah, Angelica, Eliza and I found him one day and we didn’t know what to do with him, so we brought him here. Thomas made a comment about how the cat was being a dick and Eliza had said that the personality of the cat reminded her of you, so the name just kind of stuck.”

While petting the cat, he looked over at Peggy and said, “By the way, I am not going to ever fall in love with Jefferson, I don't know what feelings you could be talking about. And for your information, John and I are sorting things out. We’re actually going on a date tonight.”

Peggy snorted. “Yeah, yelling at each other in a park at four in the morning really sounds like the two of you are sorting things out.”

Right as Alex opened his mouth to rebut when Jefferson yelled from his room for Alex.

Jefferson held out a pair of pants to him. “These are the smallest size of mine I could find; I don’t know if they’ll fit you. I’m still looking for a shirt, but you can go change in the bathroom.”

Alex went and changed, leaving his clothes folded up on the counter. When he came back in the room, Jefferson was holding a shirt out for him, not paying attention as he was still looking for clothes for himself.

“Button all but the top two and roll the sleeves up to your elbows.” Thomas turned around and looked him up and down, his eyes settling on his chest. “Didn’t know you had tattoos.”

Alex put on the shirt and followed his instructions on how he was to wear it. “That would be because I don’t exactly walk shirtless around the White House and I always wear shirts long enough to cover my wrists.”

Thomas gulped almost nervously and then gestured for Alex to leave the room. “Tell Peggy I’ll be out there shortly.”

“I need to grab my phone, real quick,” Alex said, remembering that he had placed it in his jacket pocket, and his jacket was still in the bathroom.

Jefferson nodded and went back to finding an outfit for himself. Alex grabbed his phone quickly and went to leave the room, but Jefferson’s voice stopped him.

“You do know that the only reason I debate with you is because you’re wrong, right?” Thomas inquired just as Alex’s hand reached the door. “I don’t hate you by any means, Alex, but there are times I’ve thought of you as my political enemy based upon the things you say.”

Alex didn’t know what to say to that, but he knew that he needed to say something. “I’m actually right about everything I debate with you about. Also, don’t call me Alex if I can’t call you Thomas.”

Thomas laughed from behind him. “Oh, yes, I’m sure you’re _always_ right. I did have a purpose to this talk, no matter how fun it may be to debate with you now.”

“And what would that purpose be?” Alex turned around to face him. He was now in a different pair of pants and in the process of picking out a shirt.

Thomas stopped his searching to look back directly at Alex. “Although your presence irritates me to no ends if you’re ever thinking of drinking even a fourth of what you put down the other night, I’d much rather you come and spend the night here. An annoying Alexander is better than a dead one, which is most likely what you would’ve been had I not come to that bar.”

“You’re over exaggerating,” Alex stated, not bothering to argue with Jefferson’s offer to let him come over. “I would’ve stopped.”

Jefferson snorted and looked back into his closet, picking out a shirt and pulling it on over his head. “You literally told me that it was what you were trying to accomplish.” He sent a smirk Hamilton’s way. “What was that about you always being right?”

Alex turned back to the door and opened it this time, successfully leaving. Almost immediately, Alexander was wrapped around his ankles purring loudly.

“Seems that my cat likes you.” Thomas mused, shutting his bedroom door. “And see, we named him Alexander because he was a dick who liked no one.”

“Shut up.” Alex sent a glare back at Thomas behind him before picking up the cat and walking back to the living room.

“Finally, you two are back.” Peggy didn’t look up from her phone as she spoke. “Here I was starting to think that you two were fucking or something.”

Thomas started spluttering, not knowing what to say, whereas Alex just glared at her.

“Who knows, you guys were definitely in there long enough to do something.” She pocketed her phone and jumped up from her space on the couch. “Who’s ready to go shopping?”

Alex set the cat down on the ground and then followed the other two out the door, not really ecstatic about spending the day shopping, but not upset about it either. He locked Jefferson’s door behind him and shut it, jogging slightly to catch up with the two of them at the elevator, who were quietly discussing what shops they wanted to go to.

“Do you have any requests, Alex?” Peggy asked him once they were in the elevator.

“I need a new sweater that I’m going to wear tonight,” Alex told her, “but other than that, I’m just coming along to help you out, Pegs.”

Jefferson looked at him in confusion. “Since when do you wear sweaters? What are you doing tonight? What do you help Peggy out with?”

“Interrogation time!” Peggy smiled brightly; she loved when it was someone else interrogating Alex and not the other way around.

“Yes, I wear sweaters, I enjoy them more so than other types of clothing.” Alex began to answer his questions. He didn’t want to answer the second question, considering that it was Thomas Jefferson he was speaking to. “And to answer your other question, Peggy doesn’t like trying things on alone in stores, so I try on clothes with her, while providing advice.”

“You didn’t answer his other question,” Peggy said in a singsong voice. “Thomas, he’s going on a date tonight, since he won’t answer the question himself.”

Thomas raised an eyebrow but didn’t press it any further. “It’s rather kind of you to help Peggy like that, I wouldn’t expect you to be that kind.”

Peggy was first to exit the elevator when it reached the lobby, but not before rolling her eyes. “He’s got a soft spot for us Schuyler sisters, you’ll get to see that firsthand.”

“I do not!” Alex argued, exiting after she did. “I treat you three the same as I do anyone else.”

“You dated Eliza, you almost dated Angelica, and I’m your best friend after Lafayette.” Peggy reminded him. “You definitely have a soft spot for us.”

Thomas found himself amused at their behavior as he followed them out of the elevator. He rushed ahead and held open the door for both of them, much to Alex’s chagrin.

“You didn’t need to do that.”

“But I did anyways.”

Angelica honked the horn of her car when she saw the three of them exit the building. “Eliza, look at Peggy’s hair!”

Eliza smiled when she saw it. “Nice to see she’s finally coming out of her shell.”

The doors to the car opened on both sides and Thomas got in on one side, leaving Peggy to sit in the middle and Alex on the other end.

They all greeted each other and Eliza turned around to face Alex directly. She handed him his wallet, to which he smiled gratefully at.

“Thank you for telling John that you’d allow him another chance.” She spoke gently, but loud enough for him to hear.

“Yeah,” Angelica butted in, “I would _not_ have done the same if I was in your place.”

“Can we drop the subject, guys?” Peggy asked. “It looks like it’s making Alex uncomfortable.”

“Oh, then please do continue.” Thomas piped up.

“Shut the hell up, Thomas.” Alex shot a glare at him.

“Alright, alright ladies.” Angelica laughed and turned on the radio. “No need to argue.”

Peggy got out her phone and typed out a quick message and then looked at Alex expectantly. He got out his phone just as the text arrived.

 **pegs:** yknow,,,, i’m sure thomas would be a wonderful boyfriend  
**pegs:** as in  
**pegs:** one who doesn’t need to have second chances bc he doesn’t hurt you like that  
**To: pegs:** I am n e v e r going to date Jefferson, Peggy. John and I are going to get better.  
**pegs:** give me one good reason as to why you and him are still together?  
**To: pegs:** Don’t do this, Peggy.  
**pegs:** one good reason, Alex.  
**To: pegs:** Because I love him.  
**pegs:** it hasn’t been love for the longest time, Alexander. you know that. you just love the idea of him, the idea of the perfect relationship with him.  
**To: pegs:** Even if that were true, I’m not going to date just turn around and date Thomas.  
**pegs:** ooh, first name basis? ;)

“Thomas Jefferson, get your damn eyes off of my damn phone!” Peggy all but shouted and Alex felt a chill go down his back.

“You’re talking about me!” He exclaimed. “I was trying to see who you’re talking to!”

“Your future boyfriend.” Peggy quipped back, causing the girls in front to laugh a bit.

“Don’t listen to Pegs, Thomas.” Angelica was smiling and her tone was light. “She has this absurd idea of you dating a certain guy, but we don’t think it’s going to ever work.”

Thomas didn’t like being the uncomfortable one in the situation, so he started trying to put his feelings on to someone else. Namely, Alexander.

“So, Eliza, Peggy says that you and Alexander used to date?” He watched Alex carefully for any change in emotion. The only emotion that changed was that he now had a larger smile. It wasn't exactly news to him that the two of them had dated, he knew better than anyone that Eliza and Alexander dated, but he wanted to see how Alex would react to him bringing it up. 

“You didn’t know that?” Eliza laughed. “I thought that was just common knowledge.”

“Best relationship I ever had!” Alex was laughing as well, and Thomas felt he was missing out on something.

"Hey! I was one of those other relationships!" Angelica teased, but showed no sign of ill will. 

“They dated to hide the fact that they were both flaming gays,” Peggy whispered to him, causing a blush to spread across Thomas’ cheeks. Luckily, his complexion hid it well enough that no one else could tell.

Angelica parked the car and everyone filed out.

“Alright gang, any requests on where to start?” Eliza asked.

“Mia’s Boutique!” Peggy excitedly spoke before anyone else could. “I need to get a new dress that’ll suit my hair and I’m pretty sure that’s where we got your last sweater, Alex.”

“To the boutique, then!” Angelica and Eliza led the group, Peggy, Thomas, and Alex walked behind them.

“Thomas, sorry in advance; I don’t think there’s much that you’d be interested in looking at in there,” Peggy said as they approached the store.

“It’s fine, Peggy.” He gave her a smile. “I can provide fashion advice while you’re trying things one, better than Hamilton can, at least.”

Alex laughed at that. “You’d be surprised, Jefferson.”

Upon entering the store, the two older Schuyler sisters went their own way, letting the other three fend for themselves. Alex grabbed Peggy’s hand and took her over to the sweaters, leaving Thomas to decide for himself whether or not he wants to follow.

“I like the yellow one.” Alex pointed to a knit sweater in a pastel shade of yellow.

“We go over this every time, Alex,” Peggy almost glared at him, “although yellow is a lovely color, it does not suit you and I am not going to stand here and let you get a yellow sweater.”

“What about that green one?” Thomas asked, pointing to one just above Hamilton’s reach. “That one would make your eyes pop.”

Peggy nodded in excited agreement. “Can you grab that one for him?”

Thomas complied and handed it to Hamilton, who was wearing an exasperated expression. “Peggy, you know that green is John’s least favorite color and he’s bound to complain about it.”

Thomas bit his tongue to keep from speaking out about how John shouldn't give a flying fuck about what Alexander wears, and if he's really worth anything, then he should just be happy that Alex wants to go out with him.

“All the more reason to wear it!” Peggy grinned and basically skipped over to the dresses. She was already browsing with two in her arms by the time Alex caught up with her and found her in the chaotic mess.

“Thomas?” Peggy inquired, looked at the taller man with a happy expression. “Would you be a dear and go wait by the dressing rooms?”

Thomas nodded, not having a problem with that. “Will I be giving advice to Hamilton, as well?”

“Most likely, yes.” Peggy replied at the same time Alex responded, “No!”

As soon as Thomas was out of earshot, Peggy showed Alex the dresses in her hands. “Find one of each in your size.”

“He’s never going to let me live this down.” Alex shook his head as he searched through all of the dresses on the racks.

“You’re going to give him the shock of his life.” Peggy found another one and waited for Alex to find the matching one before the two of them walked over to the dressing rooms, where Eliza and Angelica had joined Thomas.

“Could one of you hold my sweater?” Alex asked.

Eliza nodded and he handed it to her before he went in. As he was closing the door he heard Eliza comment, “Nice to see that Peggy finally convinced him into the green one.”

“Actually, I did,” Thomas responded, rather excited to see what his advice would be compared to Hamilton’s.

“You sound very eager, Jefferson,” Angelica noted. “I’m guessing you know what they’re doing, then?”

“Alexander said that he tries on clothes at the same time as Peggy so she doesn’t feel alone and gives her advice.” Thomas’ voice did sound rather eager. “I just want to see how my advice is compared to his.”

“You ready, Alex?” Peggy asked loud enough for her friend to hear in the room next to hers.

“Depends. Floral one, right?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

“Okay, then yes, I’m ready.”

The two of them opened their doors at nearly the same time and the attention was suddenly all on them. And, oh, how Alex wishes he had a camera to capture the look on Jefferson’s face. Angelica whistled at them and Eliza gave a thumbs up, whereas Jefferson simply looked as if he didn’t know what to do. It was blissful.

Alex turned to Peggy who spun for him. “I don’t know if I’m really liking the floral print with your hair, Pegs. The length looks odd, too.”

She nodded in agreement. “It doesn’t really go well with your tan if I’m honest. But that’s alright, we’ve got two more. Maybe Thomas can actually give his opinion on those after he gets out of his stupor over how great you look in a dress.”

Alex shot her a playful glare and walked back into the dressing room. “The white one or the blue one?”

“White one.”

He took off the first one and put on the second, admiring himself in the mirror for a moment. His hair was starting to look like a rat’s nest, so while he was waiting for Peggy he fixed the bun into a neater one.

“I’m ready if you are!” She called out, and Alex responded that he was ready.

They walked out together again and Jefferson appeared to be more composed, much to Alex’s disappointment.

“I really like this one,” Peggy said with a grin on her face.

“You should.” Alex looked her up and down. “You look wonderful in it. The white makes your hair stand out more, but the dress still manages to look casual yet elegant on you. The length even works, and it’s hard to find a length that works with you. It would also go well with Laf's purple and white tie if you want to wear it on a date. I say you get it. Jefferson, your opinion?”

“Uh, yeah.” Thomas felt like smacking himself. He wanted to show Hamilton how better versed he was in fashion, and yet he manages to come out looking like the fool. “I think Alexander covered it all.”

“Are you going to get it?” Peggy nodded, which made Alex smile. “Okay, we can go change and then go check out, then.”

“Uh, no you can’t,” Eliza spoke up, a mischievous grin on her face. “You went into the dressing rooms with three dresses, and Alex, you never leave without a new dress. So Peggy can change back, but we want to see the other one. Or at least, I do.”

“I don’t think-” Alexander was cut off by Angelica’s agreement.

“That makes two of us that definitely want to see it. What about you, Thomas?”

Thomas swallowed nervously, and as much as it pained him to say it, he wanted to see Alexander in another dress. “Go put it on so we can see it, Alexander.”

Alex flipped them all off while Peggy giggled; she went and changed back into her other clothes, whereas he went and changed into the third dress. It was a sleeveless button up dress that took him some time to get to the top, but when he did get to the top, he didn’t half ass it and he buttoned all the way to the top button.

He walked out, well aware that he looked great. However, he didn’t want to give them the satisfaction of knowing he liked the dress, so he kept a glare on his face.

“Damn, Alex!” Peggy catcalled towards him. “Forget what I said about green because blue looks great on you!”

He looked at Thomas, who couldn’t seem to take his eyes off of him for some godforsaken reason. “Any comments from the fashionista?”

“The dress looks nice on you. Makes your tattoos stick out. You should get it.” It seemed as if Thomas’ words were stuck in his throat as he spoke.

“Well, come on then, we haven’t got all day.” Angelica jokingly said. “Go get changed so we can check out; we’ve only got another eleven hours before we need to drop you off.”


	6. mom friend laf/sweetheart tommy

Alex stood in front of the mirror in Lafayette’s room, looking himself up and down. Jefferson had given him specific instructions on how to wear the sweater, and although he hated to admit it, the outfit looked good.

“If you’re done inspecting votre tenue,” Lafayette spoke, switching to French in the middle of his sentence, “vos cheveux est un gâchis. Run a brush through it.”

Alex turned to face his friend. “Are you sure the outfit is okay?”

“Tu es magnifique,” Lafayette assured. “Thomas knows what he’s saying when he talks about clothes.”

“How did you know Jefferson told me what to wear?” Alex questioned, taking the brush that Lafayette offered.

“You wouldn’t have worn the button up under the sweater,” Lafayette smirked as he said the next part of his statement. “Il a également une des choses pour les gars dans des chandails et bouton enfoncé shirts.”

Alex’s face turned red and he shook his head. “I don’t know why you and Peggy think we’re going to date.”

“C'est la tension sexuelle, mon amour.”

He was about to make some sort of retort when a knock at the door brought their attention elsewhere.

“You stay here,” Lafayette instructed, “I want to have a word with him before you go.”

“Whatever you want to tell John, you can say in front of me, Gil.”

“Just stay here, Alexander.” His tone left no room for debate, and to emphasize his point, he closed the door on his way out.

Lafayette opened the front door and allowed John to come in.

“Is Alex almost ready?” John asked, his voice filled with kindness.

Lafayette nodded and took a deep breath. “He is ready, but I’d like to speak with you before you two leave.”

“Okay, shoot.” John cocked his head slightly in confusion and intrigue.

Lafayette looked at him very sternly. “John, you and Alex are both my friends, very dear friends. However, I have been friends with Alex much longer and we have been through much more together. Although I do respect Alex’s decision to allow you another chance, I do not support it, and if he comes home in tears tonight, I will be on Alex’s side, and I need you to be aware of that. I also cannot promise that I will be the calmest and most rational person if he comes home in tears tonight. Are we on the same page, mon ami?”

“Dear Lord, Gilbert,” Alex spoke from behind them. “Our date is going to go perfectly fine tonight.”

“I thought I told you to stay put?” Lafayette turned around to face him, a smile playing on his lips despite his tone of voice.

“You’re not my mom.” He shrugged and went over to John, who wrapped his arm around Alex’s waist.

“Nonetheless, we’re on the same page, Laf.” John nodded, a little anxiously. If he was honest with himself, he was terrified that his big mouth would get in the way of everything and he and Alex would end up arguing like they always seem to.

“Good,” Lafayette nodded his head, then made a shooing motion with his hands, “get out of here, then. Have him back by ten, no later.”

“Again, you’re not my mom.” Alex rolled his eyes at his friend’s behavior and allowed himself to be led out of the apartment.

John moved his arm from around Alex’s waist to hold his hand, figuring it’d be easier to walk like that. They walked together in a silence that could almost be considered awkward, while John kept looking down at Alex’s sweater. It fit him well and looked rather nice on him, but he couldn’t help but feel that he had picked out the color purely because it was John’s least favorite color.

“What’s the plan for tonight?” Alex asked, bringing John out of his thoughts.

“I’ve got reservations for us, and then I thought we’d go for a walk.” Alex wore a smile on his face, and John was thankful that he got to experience the good moods of him because they were truly wonderful. “How does that sound?”

“Absolutely fantastic.” Alex pressed a kiss to his cheek and got in the car.

John walked around to the other side and got in, starting the vehicle and putting the car into gear. He began to drive away and reached over to grab Alex’s hand.

“You look nice lovely, John,” Alex commented, breaking the silence between them. He wasn’t wearing anything unlike what he would usually wear on dates, a nice button down and a nice pair of jeans, but Alex made sure to compliment him at every given opportunity. He thought that maybe it would distract a bit from their constant bickering.

John’s grip on Alex’s hand tightened ever so slightly as he said, “You do too, Alex.”

“So you like the sweater, then?” Another smile bloomed on Alex’s face.

“I mean,” John cleared his throat, “the color looks nice on you, but I can’t help feeling like you picked the color because you know I don’t like it.”

Alex took a deep breath as he tried to refrain from letting his emotions get the best of him. “We picked it out today shopping because everyone told me it would look nice on me. I’m sorry that you don’t like it.”

“It’s my least favorite color, Alex, you know that.”

“It’s just a color, you can get over it.” John could hear clearly in Alex’s voice that he was getting worked up, so he tried his best to change the subject.

“How was shopping today? Did you get anything other than the sweater?” He kept his tone light, hoping that Alex would drop the other conversation.

“Shopping was fine, it’s always a fun time.” Alex tried to reign in his emotions, wanting this date to go well. There was so much tension all the time between them, and Alex just needed  _someone_ to love, and he tried so hard to make that someone be John. “I got a new dress and some more stationary; I also picked up another flash drive so I can clear some space on my laptop.”

“You got a new dress?” John asked tentatively as he parked the car.

“Yeah, surprisingly, it’s my first blue one.” Alex unbuckled his seatbelt and began to get out of the car, still talking. “It’s a collared dress and it buttons up, I wasn’t too sure about it, but everyone was telling me it looked good, so I went ahead and got it. I warmed up to it more throughout the day, and I really do like it.”

John bit his tongue to try and refrain from saying anything, but the silence was enough for Alexander. He could tell that he had tensed up quite a bit from the way he reacted when he grabbed his hand again, the two of them walking inside in silence.

“Reservation under Laurens,” John told the man at the front before he could be asked.

“Right this way, please.” The two were ushered away to a booth and given menus before left alone in silence again.

The two of them looked through their menus, holding hands across the table for a few minutes before the silence was broken by Alex.

“Do you really not like me getting dresses?” He asked, not looking up from his menu.

John put down his menu and used his other hand to grab Alex’s jaw gently, moving his head to look him in the eyes. “Alex, you know that it’s not that I don’t like you getting them.”

“Then what is it?” Alex took his hand away from John’s and gripped the other side of his menu, needing to grab something that wasn’t John’s hand. “What don’t you like about it?”

“Alex, darling, please, I’m trying to have a nice date with you.” John’s voice carried a pleading tone and he tried to reach back over for Alex’s hand.

“What better time to talk about our issues than when we’re trying to fix them?” Alex shrunk away from his touch, knowing that it would just distract him.

“If we start talking about it now, then we’ll just start arguing, and then tonight will be ruined. You know that.”

“If you just tell me-” Alex was cut off by a waiter coming and asking for their drink orders.

“I’d like a water, please. I’m guessing John will have tea, sweet if you have it.” Alex didn’t look away from John as he spoke, intent on keeping eye contact. To the waiter, it just looked as if they were two men in love, but to John, he knew that it was because Alex wasn’t going to back down.

“Alexander, can you please just drop it?” John asked as soon as the waiter walked away.

“I will after you tell me why you don’t like my dresses,” Alex said forcefully, his tone filled with a finality that John knew he wasn’t going to sway away.

John sighed, seeing that he wasn’t going to be able to get out of telling him. “I don’t like your dresses because you’re supposed to be  _masculine_. If I wanted someone feminine, I would have a girlfriend.”

Alex froze. He knew that the reasoning wasn’t going to be good, but he didn’t expect it to sting that bad. He certainly was not expecting an answer like that. He looked back at the menu, wanting to avoid eye contact with John at all cost.

“Darling.” John’s voice was soft and he to move Alex’s head up to look at him again, only for Alex to move his head out of his grasp. “Please look at me, love.”

“I’m reading my menu.” Alex’s voice was sharp but wavering a bit. John mentally slapped himself, knowing that the rest of the night wasn’t going to get any better.

“Alex, please.” His tone was almost one of begging; he needed this date to get better. He needed his Alex to be, well, his.

“I said that I would drop it; this is me dropping it.” Alex looked up from his menu for a split second, but it was long enough for John to see the hurt in his eyes.

John ran a hand through his hair, his mind racing, trying to figure out how to fix this before he loses Alex. He was still in thought by the time the waiter came back with their drinks, asking them what they wanted to eat.

“May I have the house soup?” Alex gave the waiter a kind smile as he spoke, trying to regain his composure.

“Most certainly! And for you, sir?”

“I think I’ll have the same.” John took Alex’s menu and handed it over to the waiter’s open hand.

When the waiter left them, the two of them fell back into silence. Alex was still avoiding eye contact with John, his mind going everywhere.

 _Maybe I shouldn’t have given him a second chance._ Alex thought to himself, looking everywhere but at John. _The things he said to me, they were awful. And they weren’t things that could have just suddenly appeared in his head, he had to have given thought to them. And already tonight, he’s made me feel hurt and irrelevant. This wasn’t a good idea, I shouldn’t have come, I shouldn’t have told him I’d give him another chance, I sho-_

“Alexander, are you alright?” John cautiously tried to place his hand back over Alex’s, only for Alex to flinch away.

Alex felt as if the room was getting smaller and everything seemed duller. Everything sounded muffled, except for his heartbeat that he could hear pounding in his ears. The room felt a lot warmer suddenly than it had and Alex felt a little sweat on his brow.

“I need to go.” The words were rushed out of his mouth as he spoke. He took his wallet out and threw a twenty on the table, figuring that it would be enough to cover. He got out of the booth and was moving as fast as he could, trying not to run into things.

His eyes began to water and he heard John coming after him, telling the man at the front that they’d be back in soon.

“What’s wrong, Alexander?” John worriedly asked from behind him as he came to a stop on the sidewalk.

The tears began to fall from his eyes as he turned around to face John. “Everything, John. I can’t do this, I’m so sorry.”

“What do you mean?” John’s eyes widened and he felt his heart drop.

“I can’t just ignore the things you say and pretend they're alright, John.” Alex was rushing everything out and his tears were falling faster and faster. “They had to have meaning behind them, you were obviously thinking of them for quite some time. And then the comment about my masculinity; what does it matter if I like dresses? It’s just an item of clothing, just a piece of cloth! It would be different if this was the first time any of this had been happening, John, but it’s not. It’s the seventh time, and I just can’t do it anymore.”

Alex didn’t want to hear anything John had to say. He knew that if he stayed with him any longer, he’d be convinced yet again to give him another chance and he just  _couldn’t._ He turned around and walked away as fast as he could, leaving John there, stunned. He didn’t have to walk far until he came upon one of DC’s many bars. He walked in and went straight to the bar, asking for a straight whiskey.

He sat down at one of the stools, put his head in his hands, and cried. He let the tears flow freely, not even looking up as the bartender slid the whiskey in front of him.

He knew that this would cause a rift in their friend groups and Alex knew that he wouldn’t be able to stand knowing that he was the reason for it. Although on the outside, the Secretary of Treasury was a strong and intelligent man who let nothing get to him, on the inside he was broken, and he thought John could help him fix it. Instead, it seems he’s only been hurt more.

“God damn it, Hamilton.” A voice that Alex knew all too well drawled from behind him. “This morning I literally told you that if you were thinking about drinking much at all to come crash at my apartment instead, and now it looks as if you’re on the verge of ordering enough to drink yourself to death.”

“Go away and leave me be, Jefferson.” Alex’s voice came out broken, and it struck a chord in Thomas.

Thomas slid into the stool next to him. “No. You’re not really in the best position to be telling me what to do, you know.”

Alex tried to glare at him, but it came out as more of a grimace. He turned away from Thomas and focused on the wall behind the bar as he took a drink of his whiskey.

“You can drink that glass because you look like you need it, but after that, you’re coming home with me.” Thomas carefully watched as Alex drank, studying his face. He had seen it plenty of times before, in many different emotions. He had seen Alex angry, many times, he had seen him ecstatic, hell, he had even seen him in a rage of jealousy before, but not once had he seen the man upset. No, he had to take that back. He had seen him upset, but never sad, never defeated. And certainly never crying.

“You can’t tell me what to do.” Alex defiantly spoke, downing more of his drink.

“No, but you aren’t exactly the heaviest person,” Thomas smirked smugly. “It won’t take much to lift you over my shoulder and take you out to my car.”

“That is non-consensual, and I do not stand for that.” Alex turned back to face Thomas, his drink over half empty.

“So is leaving you here to drink yourself to death.”

“I don’t need your consent to die, you realize that, right?”

Thomas glared slightly at him. “Alexander, you’re going to come back with me one way or another, might as well make it easy on yourself.”

“Why can’t I just go back to my apartment?” Alex downed the rest of his drink in one gulp and cringed a little at the burn in the back of his throat.

“I’m not stupid, I know that you most likely have alcohol in your apartment.” Thomas deadpanned, signaling the bartender over.

“I don’t want to go back with you.”

“Look, I know you hate me with an undying passion, but I’m trying to be a nice guy and care for your wellbeing.” Thomas’ patience was wearing thin; he had half a mind to go ahead and just leave him. “Your date obviously didn’t go well considering the Schuyler’s dropped you off just over an hour ago and you’re already trying to drink yourself to death. Now, you can either come back with me and talk through it before doing something you regret, or you can be an asshole about it and stay here.”

Alex didn’t answer him, and instead asked the bartender that came back over for his check. Thomas was glad that Hamilton was choosing the lesser of two evils, but he was also slightly upset that he had to be a dick in order to get Alexander to come with him.

“Let’s go,” Alex grumbled, getting out of his stool and walking through the bar that was starting to crowd up. Thomas followed directing Alex to his car.

“You realize that I’m not going to tell you about my date, right?” Alex said after a few minutes of silence between the two of them.

“You realize that you are, right?” Thomas retorted, keeping his eyes on the road and off of Alex.

“You’ve already made me come along with you, Jefferson.” Alex debated whether or not he should say his next words, but like always, he didn’t listen to his subconscious telling him no. “That’s two nights in a span of three that you’re making me stay with you, it’s almost as if you are attracted to me.”

Thomas snorted and smiled a bit. “And so what if I am? Maybe if you weren’t so keen on drinking yourself to death, we wouldn’t have this problem.”

Both of them fell silent after that, Alex at a loss for words for once. They stayed in the silence all the way until they were in the elevator of View 14, which was far longer than Thomas had expected Alex to go silent.

“I don’t actually hate you, Jefferson.” Alex timidly spoke, his voice betraying the strong vibe he was trying to put off. “I hate your ideas, sure, you support all of the wrong causes. For instance, you took a perfectly good democrat, James Madison, and made him a republican. I mean, look at him, you gave him anxiety. But I don’t hate you as a person.”

“You don’t have to lie to me just because I told you I don’t hate you, Alexander.” Thomas mused, allowing Alex to exit the elevator first. “And James has always been a republican. The anxiety came with you making him help write the Federalist Papers.”

“I don't exactly think that you know the extent of mine and Madison's relationship with the Federalist Papers. And I mean it, I don’t really hate you as a person.” Alex stepped out of the way to allow Thomas to unlock his apartment.

Thomas made a sound of amusement but didn’t say anything else on the subject as he turned on the lights and shut the door behind Alex.

“I can go get you a pair of pajamas, just wait here,” Thomas instructed. “Sit down or something, but don’t make a mess.”

Alex tentatively sat down on the sofa, dread sinking into his gut as he realized that Thomas wasn’t going to let him get away with not talking about everything that happened. The alcohol in his system would make it easier to talk, but it wouldn’t help the hurt. No, he didn’t have near enough to dull his senses and emotions that much, although he wished he had.

“Here are some clothes,” Thomas tossed them to him, bringing him out of his thoughts, “they’ll probably be too big. You’re quite a bit taller than James, and I figured it’d be better for the clothes to be too big than too small, so I got a pair of mine. The bathroom is the last door on the right in the hall.”

Alex gave him a nod of thanks and left to the bathroom. He folded his clothes haphazardly as he undressed and put on the clothes Thomas gave him. He was right, they were most definitely too big on him. Not only was Alex seven inches shorter than him, he also lacked muscle, something that Thomas had plenty to spare of. He had to tie the pants up on top of his waist to get them to stay even a little bit and the shirt was falling off of his shoulder slightly on one side. However, he wasn’t in much of a position to complain, and he was thankful for what he got. He grabbed his pile of clothes and walked back out to the living room.

“You can set your clothes and shoes by the door.” Thomas didn’t look up from his phone as Alex came out. The first thing Alex noticed was that he too had changed, and he seemed to be texting someone urgently.

Thomas made a face at his phone before turning it off and setting it on the coffee table; he’d deal with Lafayette some other time. Right now he had Hamilton to deal with.

“We’re gonna have a talk, Alexander,” Thomas said bluntly, patting the seat next to him for Alex to come sit, “because you are not going to keep going into bars intent on drinking until your feelings go away. That’s not how you deal with emotions, because they’re just going to come out and explode at someone, and the media will just eat up the Secretary of Treasury losing his shit.”

Alex sat down where Thomas wanted him to and felt his nerves slowly become more. “How do you know I want to drink until my feelings go away?”

Thomas gave an emotionless laugh. “Isn’t that what everyone wants to do when things aren’t going as planned?”

Alex didn’t answer and instead looked down, away from Thomas’ burning gaze.

“Alexander, shouldn’t you be on a date right now?” Thomas questioned. “What happened?”

“I don’t want to talk about it, Jefferson.” Alex felt his throat constricting slightly along with his eyes starting to water as everything came back and hit him full force.

“Call me Thomas, at least right now.” His tone was gentle, much different than Alex had ever heard it. “I understand you don’t _want_ to talk about it, but there’s a difference between needing and wanting, and you need to talk about it.”

A few tears escaped Alex’s eyes and he wiped them away quickly, hoping Thomas didn’t see them. Of course, he saw, much to Alex’s dismay, and he found himself sitting in an awkward hug with Thomas.

“This is why you need to talk about it, Alexander.” Thomas softly spoke. “I know it hurts, whatever happened, but this is why it needs to be talked about.”

Alex nodded into Thomas’ shirt where he was pressed, more tears coming out. His voice sounded choked up as he responded. “I know I need to talk about it, but I can’t.”

Thomas pulled him away and held him at arm's length. “You can talk, believe me, I know you can talk.”

Thomas racked his brain for possible ways to get Alex to talk to him, and couldn’t come up with any. If there was anything he knew about Alexander, it was that if he didn’t want to do something, he wouldn’t, and next to no one could change his mind. So instead, Thomas just did was he used to do with James while he cried; he just held him until the tears stopped.

The only problem with this was that when Thomas held Alexander, more tears started. Soon, Alex was sobbing into Thomas’ shirt, while the latter just held him and rubbed circles on his back. As irritating as Alex was ninety-eight percent of the time, seeing him like this worried Thomas to no end, as much as he hated to admit to himself.

After what seemed like ages, the crying slowed until he was no longer sobbing, but a few tears still escaped. He didn’t back out of Thomas’ hold immediately like Thomas thought he would, but instead, he curled into Thomas’ side so he was sat better.

They sat in silence, excluding the sound of Alex’s sniffling, until Alex decided that he had calmed down enough to talk.

“John Laurens and I have had a thing for well over a year.” Alex softly began. Thomas pretended as if he didn't know, as he looked down at the man in his arms, his face full of a care that encouraged Alex to keep talking. “We never officially called it dating because the one time I asked him to be my boyfriend, he said no.

“We argued a lot. Maybe it was just because we’re a lot alike, maybe it was just because of our differences. But every time we would argue, John would find something that he knew I was insecure about and he would pick it out and make me feel like shit over it. Because of that, we almost called off whatever we were several times. Every time, though, John convinced me to give him another chance.”

Alex stopped to compose himself more, knowing that the next part would take a toll out of him to say out loud. Thomas was still rubbing circles on his back, looking at him with encouragement.

Alex cleared his throat and started again. “The other night when you found me in the bar the first time, we had gotten into another argument. He crossed over a line that I didn’t think he would ever even consider crossing, one that was low even for him. The argument had started over something small, I can’t even remember it at this point, but it escalated quickly like they always do.

“It- it got to a point where it looked like I was going to win the argument, which basically means that the whole ordeal would be dropped. And then John decided he would yell at me about how I am a sociopath who doesn’t love anything outside of himself, then he went on to say things such as that I was taking after my mother and I just wanted to be with him to whore around. He said that the reason I can’t love is because no one ever gave me love and I don’t deserve it.”

An angry expression soon found its place on Thomas’ face and Alexander cut him off before he could say anything. “I’m not done speaking, and I don’t know if I’ll be able to start again if you cut me off. John convinced me to give him another chance last night, or maybe it was early this morning, and I agreed to a date tonight, saying that if it all went well, we’d be good. He made a comment about how I like wearing dresses and how, in his words, if he wanted someone feminine he would have a girlfriend, like wearing dresses makes me less masculine. Everything came back and hit me hard while we were in the restaurant and I freaked out on him and left, then you found me in the bar.”

Tears were flowing freely on Alex’s face by the time he finished talking and Thomas looked angry beyond belief. It wasn’t because he was overly protective of Alex himself, but it was because no one deserved to be treated like that. No one should ever talk to another like that, and especially make comments about someone’s mother who everyone knows is dead.

“Thomas, please say something.” Alex looked up at the angry man holding him.

“That fucker.” Thomas’ accent was heavier than Alex had ever heard it and it took him by surprise.

“Don’t confront him about this, I’d rather no one know that I told you all of this.” Alex requested. “Plus, I’d rather not tell anyone that we’re cuddling.”

“Glad we’re on the same page about that much, then.” Thomas removed his arms from around Alex at that comment, realizing that cuddling was indeed what they were doing. “You shouldn’t have given him another chance.”

“Yeah, I realize that, thank you Captain Obvious.” Even though he had tear marks streaked down his face and he looked like a wreck, Alex still managed to have a voice full of sarcasm. "Now, I didn't say that I didn't appreciate your cuddling, I just said that I'd rather people not know."


	7. jemmy and lexi

Thomas awoke to someone pounding on his front door. He slowly sat up in his bed, wiping away the sleep from his eyes. He gingerly stretched, hearing the satisfying noise of his joints all popping where they needed to. He grabbed his glasses sitting on his nightstand and put the on his face, blinking a few times to get the world around him adjusted.

The pounding at his door just got louder, but he still took his sweet time on getting up. If it was really that important, they could wait a few more moments. He grabbed the hair tie sitting by his glasses case and tied his curly mane of hair.

He closed his bedroom door after him and picked up his pace as the pounding got louder yet. He didn’t need his neighbors filing a noise complaint on him again. He looked at the sofa, where the pile of blankets and pillows he left for Hamilton were nicely folded, wondering where Hamilton was. He was probably in the bathroom, Thomas decided, looking through the peephole in his door. Outside was an angry looking Lafayette and a bored Peggy.

Thomas opened the door with a confused look on his face. “It’s eight on a Sunday, you’re going to get me a noise complaint.”

Lafayette peered past Thomas, obviously looking for something, probably Hamilton. Thomas’ suspicions were proven correct when Lafayette asked, “Where is he?”

Thomas stepped out of the way to allow the two of them to walk in. Peggy still looked bored, but as she walked past him, he could see the concern in her eyes.

“I’m assuming he’s in the bathroom, why?” Thomas closed the door after they were inside.

Lafayette’s eyes were ablaze. “You mean you don’t know where he is?”

“You should probably go check the bathroom, Thomas.” Peggy’s tone was as bored as she looked and he could tell she was stifling a yawn. Who knows when the last time she slept was.

Thomas was still confused as he walked down the hall to the bathroom. However, he didn’t know why Lafayette was angry and would rather not be on the Frenchman’s bad side this early in the morning.

He knocked on the bathroom door and waited for a response. When he didn’t get one, he knocked a little louder and called out Hamilton’s name. And when he didn’t get a response then, he decided that the saying ‘drastic times call for drastic measures’ applied to escaping the wrath of his friend, and he opened the bathroom door, slightly worried of what he’d find on the other side.

As it turns out, Alexander was not, in fact, using the bathroom. Thomas ran a hand through his hair; it was way too early to be dealing with Hamilton’s shit. He could handle in when it was getting to be late at night and he had had a drink or two, but eight on a Sunday morning? He couldn’t handle that.

He left the bathroom and went back out to Peggy and Lafayette, the two of them looking at him expectantly. Thomas grabbed a pillow, figuring the Lafayette would want to hit something. It wasn’t often he saw his friend this angry, but it always ended in someone or something being hit.

“Okay, so he wasn’t in the bathroom.”  Thomas held the pillow up by his face; getting hit anywhere else wouldn’t hurt as bad. “What’s going on?”

“Pour l’amour de baise!” Lafayette threw up his hands in the air, his tone furious. “What the actual fuck?”

“Do either of you want to explain wh-” Thomas was cut off mid-sentence by Lafayette turning abruptly towards him.

“Why the fuck did you think it’d be a good idea to bring him back here, Thomas?” He poked Thomas in the chest when he said his name. He didn’t wait for a response and instead kept speaking. “You knew that he was fragile, tu as vu que lorsqu'il a commencé à boire au bar. He might have talked to you last night, but now he’s probably regretting all of it. Now, no one knows where the hell he is, and it’s all because tu pensais que vous pourriez mieux prendre soin de lui!”

Peggy was tapping away at her phone as Lafayette yelled at Thomas, but looked up when she heard him speaking in French.

“You’re switching between languages, dear.” She then looked back at her phone, tapping faster than before.

“Laf, it wasn’t tha-” Thomas tried to get out, but Lafayette interrupted him yet again.

“I’m not done speaking!” Lafayette’s voice was slightly softer now that Peggy had intervened, even though she hadn’t made a comment on his volume, but his accent was getting thicker as he spoke, which made him harder to understand. “You’ve talked to him civilly twice! I appreciate you getting him away from the alcohol before he kills himself of poisoning, but that does not make you two best friends all of a sudden! He would have been just fine if you had brought him home instead of here. Don’t get me wrong, we are friends, of course, but you and Alexander? I have never seen Alexander hate anyone more. And now, we don’t even know where-”

“Found him.” Peggy interrupted, looking up at both of them from her phone. “Gilbert, calm the fuck down, you are saying some incredibly harsh statements.”

Lafayette seemed to snap out of his angry haze when she announced that she had found Hamilton. “How did you find him?”

“We’re on the same phone plan; I made sure of that so I can track his phone.” She mused, putting her phone into the pocket of her cardigan. “Now, based on the address, he isn’t going to be leaving for a while, so how about we settle down and explain everything to Thomas? Calmly.”

“If you found him, then we need to go now.” Lafayette protested, turning away from Thomas and walking up to Peggy. Thomas let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and tried to wrap his head around everything that had happened in the last five minutes.

Even though she had purple hair and was the shortest of the three Schuylers, Peggy had mastered the signature ‘Schuyler Glare’ just as well as her siblings, a glare that could bring even the toughest of people to their knees. And when Peggy turned and used it on Lafayette he shut right up. She pointed to the sofa behind the two of them, and without another word, they sat down, not wanting to be on the receiving end of the glare any longer. Only after she sat down in the armchair facing the two did she go back to her bored expression.

“Will you two please explain to me what is going on?” Thomas asked after everyone had been silent for a few moments. He was almost scared on what the answer would be; not really having faith that Hamilton hadn’t produced the next big scandal in DC.

Peggy looked at Lafayette, waiting for him to answer, but took the matters into her own hands when he didn’t.

“Laf is mad at you,” She began, “simply because you texted him that Alex was here with you and then didn’t say anything further. I guess he’s also now mad that you lost him. He’s mad at Alex because he had a meltdown in a very public place and has now made himself a place on the front page of a well-known news website, which is going to make Laf’s job harder. He’s mad at Laurens because, well, other reasons. I guess Laf just took all of his anger and focused it on you.”

Lafayette gave him a sheepish look, but Thomas could still see that his anger was bubbling under the surface. “Désolé, mon ami.”

It wasn’t as bad as Thomas was expecting, especially after Lafayette blowing up on him. He was expecting more, almost, but he wasn’t complaining.

“Have you checked your email recently, Thomas?” Peggy inquired, changing the topic slightly.

“No, I’m on a break, I figured I’d check it later.” He furrowed his eyebrows together, not quite sure why she was asking.

She quirked her eyebrows. “Well, as fun as this little visit was, Gilbert and I have an Alex to catch. I’d check it soon if I were you.”

She stood up and pulled herself up off of the chair. She held out a hand for Lafayette and he took it, pulling himself up with it.

“Can I not come help?” Thomas asked, standing up with the pair, choosing to ignore Peggy’s cryptic message for the moment.

“I’m not sure that’d be the best idea,” Peggy answered, not looking back at him as she opened the door. “I don’t know how you’d react to where he was, and we don’t know what mood he’s in. Seeing someone he hates might just set him off, no matter how ‘close’ you think the two of you got.”

The two of them left before Thomas could say anything else.

The moment that the two of them got into Peggy’s car, Lafayette turned to her and asked, “So, where is he?”

Peggy put the car into reverse and backed out of the parking stall as she answered, “He’s with James.”

“That enfoiré!” Lafayette hit his hand on the dashboard, his spark of anger reignited.

That fucker, in particular, was in fact with James. He was curled up on the smaller man’s lap, allowing himself to be held as he rambled.

“Not to mention, I’ve probably fucked it all up, Jemmy.” Alex’s tone was borderline whining, but James didn’t really care. He’d seen Alex at his worse, this was nothing. “This will put a rift in all of our friendships and it’s all because I couldn’t give John another chance. I should be calling him right now, begging for him to take me back, and yet-”

“You’re here with me, Lex.” James intervened. “You’re not going to be taking John back, he doesn’t deserve you. Instead, tomorrow when you go back to work, you’re going to be snapped out of this slump you’re in, and you’re going to face John with a front that says ‘I’m better without you.’”

“And what about Jefferson?” Alex rested his head on James’ chest. “I literally spilled everything to him, I can’t face him tomorrow.”

“You can and you will. Tomorrow, you’ll go back to being the same Alexander Hamilton that defies Thomas Jefferson with every ounce of his being.” James said earnestly.

“And you’ll be the James Madison that supports Thomas Jefferson with every ounce of his being.” Alex snorted into James’ chest. “I missed coming over here, you know that, right Jemmy?”

“Then why did you stop?” James questioned, rubbing circles on Alex’s back.

“You know that if John saw me with anyone outside of our friend group he lost his shit.”

“I really hate him.” James turned Alex’s head to look at him straight on. “Now, I’m really hoping that you came over here to do more than rant to me.”

Alex fluttered his eyelashes at him. “Whatever do you mean?”

“You cheeky shit.” James pulled Alex into a kiss, which the latter melted into.

James maneuvered Alex so that he was no longer curled up on his lap, but instead straddling the smaller man. James had always taken the dominant role in their escapades, and even if they hadn’t been together since before Alex and John were a thing, this time, proved to be no different. However, it seemed that just as soon as it started, the two of them were halted to a stop when James’ doorbell rang.

Alex pulled apart from him and rested his forehead against his. “You should probably go get that. This is a time where most of your neighbors are busy at church and not being awake at eight thirty on a Sunday.”

“And yet you’re over here sinning.” James snorted, releasing his hold on Alex so he could get off of him. “You should probably go back to my bedroom, just in case. I don’t know who’s on the other side of the door. I assume you still know where it is?”

“I’m _sure_  that’s why you want me in your bedroom. And the sinning is all on you, doll. You’re the one who initiated it.” Alex smirked as the doorbell rang again. “Just get the door.”

James hit him lightly on the shoulder but got up nonetheless. He looked out of the eyehole on the door, and then back at Alex. “I mean, if you’re ready to face your friends, that’s up to you, but I still suggest you go back to my room.”

Alex’s eyes widened slightly at the statement. “Which friends?”

“Gilbert and Margarita.” James’ voice was quiet so that they couldn’t hear him on the other side of the door, but was drowned out when they rang the doorbell again.

Alex scrambled to his feet and was down the hall faster than James thought he’d be. He waited until he heard his bedroom door open to open the front door, running a hand through his hair to make it look more tousled, as though he’d just woken up.

“Mr. Lafayette and Ms. Schuyler, to what do I owe the pleasure?” His voice was laced lightly with sarcasm, as he was hoping they’d expect from Alex’s ‘enemy’s’ best friend.

“May we come in, James?” Peggy spoke before Lafayette could, not trusting what would come out of his mouth.

James stepped out of the way for the two of them. “Be my guest.”

He closed the door and gestured to the seats in his living room, taking a seat so that they would do the same.

“Again I ask, to what do I owe the pleasure?” He spoke louder than what he was sure was needed, but he figured that Alex was listening in.

“Madison, many people are well aware of the relationship that you and Alexander used to have.” Lafayette was angry, that much James could tell from the way he was holding himself. “Is there any chance that you may have seen him lately?”

James snorted and leaned back, crossing his arms as he did so. If there was anything that Thomas had taught him in all of their years of being friends, then lovers, then friends, it was how to make it seem as if you are the most superior in a room.

“Considering that we _were_ engaged, yes, it does make sense that most people know of our past relationship.” He had a smirk on his face as he talked, keeping his tone having more than a little arrogance in it. “I do nothing more than work with him now, as do you, so of course, I’ve seen him lately. What does this have to do with you being in my house at this ungodly house?”

Peggy saw what he was doing, but didn’t make a comment on it. Instead, she just clarified more on what Lafayette had said. “He means to ask if you’ve seen him, oh, within the last twelve hours.”

“Maybe I have, maybe I haven't. What does my personal life have to do with the two of you?”

Lafayette gripped the edge of the chair he was sitting in so hard that his knuckles turned white. “Will you just answer us straight? Alexander was staying with Jefferson, and now he’s gone.”

“Why would you think he’s with me?” James asked, shrugging his shoulders. “Aren’t there a million other places he would be, rather than at his ex-fiance's house? And if he wanted to get away from Thomas, why would he go to his best friend's house? There are quite a few holes in your logic, my dears.”

"We all know that you two are more than just-"

“We think he’s with you because I tracked his phone and it says he’s here.” Peggy deadpanned, cutting Lafayette off and watching James carefully.

“There it is!” James sarcastically spoke before standing up from the sofa. “If you’ll excuse me, I’ll be right back.”

James walked down the hall to his bedroom, well aware that Lafayette and Peggy were discussing him. He knew that they would be as soon as he was out of the room, but that wasn’t exactly where his mind was.

He opened his door, looking down at Hamilton who was kneeling on his floor. He held out his hand and Alex took it, only for James to shake it away. “Your phone, please.”

Alex gave him a confused look. “I’m not giving you my phone; then they’ll know I’m here.”

“Just give me your phone, Alexander.” James’ tone left no room for discussion and Alex reluctantly handed the device over. James then left, leaving the door cracked as Alex had had it.

“No need to fear, James Madison is here.” James let the arrogance seep back into his voice. “I believe this is what you’re looking for?”

He dropped the phone in Peggy’s lap and then sat back down on the sofa.

“Why the hell do you have Alexander’s phone?” Lafayette was getting louder, his grip on the chair getting tighter yet.

“He stopped by this morning.” James crossed his arms again as if daring one of them to call him out on his bullshit. “He had said that he got President Washington’s email about his break being called off because things were already getting hectic without him and Thomas. Told me that he had a lot of work to do and didn’t need his phone in the way of distracting him.”

“But that doesn’t make any sense!” Lafayette stood up, throwing his hands into the air. “Why would he drop his phone off with you, the best friend of someone he despises? Why wouldn’t he come home instead?”

James glared at Lafayette and sneered, “How about I just call him and ask him all of that? Now as _pleasurable_ as this visit has been, I have a guest in my bedroom that I would very much like to get back to. I trust you know where the door is?”

“Lafayette, go start the car.” Peggy tossed the keys to him without looking away from James. “I have a few work related things that I need to talk to James about. It would be easiest if I can just get them out of the way now.”

“You work in a café, th-” Lafayette was cut off by a glare from Peggy, followed by her again telling him to leave.

Once Lafayette was out of the house and the door was closed, Peggy turned back to James. She spoke louder than she had previously spoken as she said, “Alexander, I know you’re in James’ bedroom. You can come out now.”

James heard his bedroom door open, but he didn’t look away from Peggy as Alex came out. Alex sheepishly went over to stand by James, not looking up from the floor. Peggy walked up to him but didn’t do anything more than hold out his phone to him.

“Here, you’ll probably need this.” She grabbed his head and moved it up so he was looking at her. “Lafayette is going to kill you tomorrow at work. Make sure that Eliza tries her hardest to keep him out. I’ll be by again later with some clothes for you.”

“That won’t be necessary, Ms. Schuyler.” James butted in. “I still have some of Alex’s clothes from when we stayed together frequently.”

“Wow, that’s gay, James.” Alex’s eyes glittered with mischief, but it seemed like they always were. “Thank you, Peggy.”

She pulled him into a hug and whispered something to him that James couldn’t hear. He nodded into her shoulder and hugged her back tightly.

She was halfway to the door before she turned back to the two of them. “Before I forget, I might as well mention something of relation to work. Alex, open mic night has been moved to Tuesday instead of Thursday, will you be there?”

“Pegs, I’m there every Tuesday and Thursday, that’s not changing.” He laughed. “You should probably go back out to Lafayette before he comes in here. I’d rather not be a victim of a homicide today.”

When she had shut the door, James turned to face Alex directly. They stared at each other for a few moments before Alex inevitably broke the silence.

“We’re on the same page, right, Jemmy?” He asked, tilting his head.

“Of course. No relationship or strings attached.” He nodded, barely having time to think before Alex wrapped his arms around his neck and jumped up to wrap his legs around his waist.

“Good,” He giggled a bit, “because there are so many things that I’d rather be doing with my mouth than talking.”


	8. alexander- the workaholic

“Alexander, I swear to God that if you do not eat something, I will sit on you and not let you leave.” James was pointing a spoon at Alex as if it were a weapon, trying to make his point more threatening.

“Well, then it’s a good thing I don’t believe in God.” Alex quipped back, not looking up from his phone as he spoke. “I’ll eat something later, it slows my thinking process.”

“I’m starting to remember why we called off our engagement.” James rubbed his temples. It was too early to be dealing with Alex’s stubborn attitude, and yet, here he was. “Eating will actually help speed up your thinking process.”

“No, it’ll slow it down.” He put his phone in his pocket and his tone was blithe. “I’m pretty sure our engagement didn't actually end because of eating habits. Coffee will speed up my thinking process, actually.”

James sent a mental prayer to whatever deity was listening to help him make it through the morning with Alex. It had been a miracle that he had gotten him to go to sleep the night previous (well, not so much of a miracle as it was vigorous sex), but all that the sleep seemed to rejuvenate was Alex’s will to argue. Not that it was necessarily a bad thing; whiny and depressed Alex was starting to worry James severely. Then again, it didn't take much to worry James.

“Alexander, at least eat a damn banana.” James placed his hands on his hips and pursed his lips. “I’m seriously not going to let you leave until you eat something.”

Alex groaned, but reached over and grabbed a banana nonetheless. He peeled it and shoved some of it in his mouth, saying, “Happy now, mom?”

“Not with that attitude,” James mused, turning around to go back to unloading the dishwasher, “also, I prefer to be called Daddy.”

He heard Alex start coughing, spluttering from what James had said. He turned around and saw that his smaller counterpart’s face had turned a deep crimson, which James prided himself in being able to accomplish. Not many could say that they could embarrass Alexander Hamilton, but James could do it in just a few words.

As soon as Alex finished his banana and the two of them had another cup of coffee, they were on their way to the White House. It was much earlier than James would normally leave, and yet Alex kept complaining that they were going to be late. He had briefly considered just taking two different cabs so that he could stay in his home for even a little longer, but that idea was quickly shot down when Alex started ranting about unneeded pollution in the air.

Once inside and through security, James looked around for witnesses, before placing a kiss on Alex’s cheek.

“See you later, kid.”

Alex laughed at that, turning away to walk down the hall to his office. “You weren’t calling me kid last night.”

"I may not have been calling you kid, but you were calling me-"

"James Madison, shut your mouth."

Alex’s mind was racing with everything he needed to get done. He needed to get more done on his plan for the Puerto Rican debt crisis, he needed to revise his own debt plan after he got it back from the few people he allowed to proofread it, and he needed to look over the papers regarding foreign policy that he knew were stored somewhere on his laptop. It wasn’t until he was just outside of his office that he realized he didn’t have his laptop. No, that was at his apartment along with all of his other belongings needed.

He went to enter his office, before realizing that his keys were in his work bag. He fought the urge to let out a frustrated shout and instead took out his phone, going to his most contacted person.

“Morning, Alex!” Eliza’s cheerful voice greeted, answering after the second ring.

“Eliza, tell me you’re almost here.” He skipped pleasantries, needing the assurance that his best friend, and secretary, would be here shortly.

He could hear the worry in her voice as she responded, “Of course I am, you ask for me to be here before seven every day. What’s wrong?”

“How far are you?” He didn’t want to explain over the phone, purely for the fact that he was more than a little paranoid that the NSA bugged his phone. Or the Republicans.

“Actually, I just parked.” He could hear her car door opening in the background to prove her statement. “Alexander, what’s going on?”

“I’ll explain when you get here.” He hung up on her and pocketed his phone, walking away from his office to the entrance that she comes in every day without fail. He stood just outside of the door waiting for her.

“It’s kind of creepy, just you standing there.” She shouted to him over the wind, picking up her pace.

“Oh, stuff a sock in it.” He playfully shouted back, holding the door open for her when she caught up.

When they were inside she asked again, “So, what’s going on?”

Alex sighed biliously. “I stayed the night elsewhere last night and I don’t have any of my work things, including my keys.”

Eliza laughed at him, stopping the two of them at her desk so she could put down her things. “That’s seriously what you wouldn’t tell me over the phone?”

“The Republicans will use anything and everything they can against me.” He countered.

“The Republicans don’t have your phone bugged.” She pulled out her laptop and her set of keys from her bag. “The NSA might, but the Republicans don’t. Here, go unlock your office, your key is the red one. Use your desktop until your morning meeting, then you can borrow my laptop. Text Laf and have him bring your stuff.”

Alex took the keys and awkwardly rubbed his neck. “Uh, Laf is-”

“Super mad at you?” She supplied. “Yeah, I know. We all got the link to the news site, followed by his angry texts that most of us had to use Google Translate for.”

“Could you text him for me?” Alex asked. Although he felt back to himself after the odd events of the weekend, he still was nervous to face Laf. And John. And Jefferson.

“Oh, the things I do for you.” Eliza joked, sitting in her chair and taking out her phone.

“Best of wives and best of women.” Alex gave her sarcastic finger guns and walked the short distance to his office. He unlocked it and walked back, placing her keys on her desk. “Also, could you do me one other favor? Could you make sure no one comes into my office unless Washington is wanting in for some reason?”

Eliza didn’t look away from her laptop as she answered, busy hooking it up to the desktop computer. “I never let anyone in without asking you first as it is, Alex. Did you get some sort of brain damage or something?”

“Probably somewhere along the line.” He joked, going back to his office.

He pulled the door closed behind him and went directly to his desk, barely taking the time to pick up the papers that had been slid under his door over the weekend. He turned on the desktop and sat down in the swivel chair, taking out his phone. He turned it off and put it in his top desk drawer, not wanting it to be a distraction while he worked.

He opened up his email account, seeing two notifications for unread accounts.

 **To: Secretary of Treasury, Alexander Hamilton** **  
****From: Chief of Staff, Friedrich Steuben  
** **Subject: Debt Plan  
** ****_I have read through your initial draft for your debt plan. Apart from the few technical errors including your excessive use of the word 'fuck', everything seems to be rather brilliant, even by your standards. I do so believe that it would benefit us all in you were to present it at the meeting on Wednesday. See you soon, Alexander.  
(Also, on a separate note, what department(s) do Benjamin Walker and William North work in? I'd like to know more about them before wooing them.)_

 **To: Secretary of Treasury, Alexander Hamilton** **  
****From: White House Publicist, G.M.M. de Lafayette  
** **Subject: Recent Events.  
******_Alexander- I have covered up tracks of your very public argument with one Mr. John Laurens. I am very disappointed in you, not for ending your relations with John, but for doing it so publicly, and then running from Thomas. You owe him an apology; all he was trying to do was help. -L_

Alexander typed out a quick reply to the Baron and marked Lafayette’s email as important, to look at it later. He didn’t really want to respond at the moment, and if there was one this Alex was good at doing, it was what he wanted.

He opened Google Drive next and went to the activity log on his debt plan. From there he could see that everyone he had sent it to had opened it, at least. There were only three people he had sent it out to, and he was hoping for positive feedback from everyone. However, he knew not to be too optimistic, as one of those people was Jefferson, and there was hardly anything that Jefferson had positive feedback on that belonged to the works of Hamilton.

Alex tore his attention away from his desktop as his office door was being opened. The devil himself closed the door carelessly after himself and practically draped himself in the chairs in front of Alex’s desk, making even the hard plastic chairs that disgraced his office look like they were the most comfortable pieces of furniture on this side of the Mississippi.

“May I help you?” Alex asked, his tone neither rude nor pleasant. He knew that the right thing to do would be to apologize to Thomas, as Lafayette had said to do, but that would happen only over his dead body.

Thomas raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms, giving off the impression that he owned the place. His voice, however, was suspiciously kind. “We need to talk, Hamilton.”

“I wasn't aware that this is not talking, seeing as our mouths are moving and sound is coming out of them.” Alex’s tone had turned on to more of the antagonizing side as he spoke, “Now, there are many matters that should be discussed, for instance, my debt plan. We are both very busy men, however, and I suggest whatever you want to talk about, you do it quickly.”

“We need to talk about this past weekend.” Thomas narrowed his eyes, but his voice remained kind. “You left without a word and you were obviously not in a good state. Not to mention, Lafayette made some points about how you feel towards me. Also, please, do not get me started on your debt plan.”

Alex turned back to his computer, pulling up a few more documents he wanted to review before the morning meeting. “Emotions are not a topic for work, especially when they are regretful emotions that led to me regretfully confiding in you. I understand that this was troubling towards you, and it will not happen again, rest assured. In fact, I plan on talking to John about what happened so that everything can be settled, and he and I can go on with our relationship. Finally, whatever Lafayette said about how I feel towards you is most likely correct, considering that he knows me better than anyone.”

"You shouldn't keep going back to Laurens like a lost little puppy." Thomas raised his upper lip in thinly veiled disgust. "You're better than that."

"I am not like a lost puppy." Alexander threw yet another glare in the direction of Thomas. "And who are you to tell me what to do with my relationships? We are not friends, Jefferson."

With that, it was as if a switch was flipped within Thomas. Knowing just how much that Alexander truly did not like him would make it that much easier to knock him off of his high horse.

“I don’t believe I heard an apology, Alexander.” Thomas pointed out, his whole demeanor changing. All traces of kindness were switched out for his usual condescending voice and the disgust towards Laurens was quickly traded out for a sneer towards Hamilton.

“You can stuff whatever apology you want up your ass,” Hamilton reported, without looking away from the computer. He pointed towards the door, “Close the door on your way out.”

“Who said I was leaving?” Jefferson asked, taking out his phone and opening up Twitter.

“I did.” Alex turned to Jefferson. “Leave.”

“No.”

“What the fuck do you need, then?” Alex turned away from his computer, earnestly looking at Thomas with anger in his eyes.

Thomas lazily looked up from his phone, “The morning meeting is starting fifteen minutes early.”

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.” Alex deadpanned. “It’s seven thirty-eight.”

“Congratulations, you can read time.” Jefferson’s voice oozed sarcasm.

“That means the meeting starts in seven minutes!” He turned back to his computer and frantically moved things from one folder to another. He grabbed his phone from his desk and put it in his pocket. Alex turned off his computer in case anyone walked into his office.

He didn’t say anything else to Thomas as he left his office, figuring the Secretary of State couldn’t be stupid enough as to not know how to find his way out of an office that wasn’t his. He stopped by Eliza, who was on her phone playing a game.

“I guess I know how Jefferson got into my office, then.” Alex mused, causing her to turn around quickly.

“Oh shoot,” She sheepishly spoke, her cheeks turning red, “I’m sorry, Alex. My plants needed to be tended to.”

“It’s fine, Betsy. Can I borrow your laptop for the meeting?”

“Of course,” She unplugged it from its charger and handed it over, “Laf should be here with your belongings soon.”

\---

The meeting seemed to fly by rather smoothly- almost  _too_  smoothly, it seemed. Washington reviewed with his cabinet the reasoning of why the break he had sent Hamilton and Jefferson on was cut short, along with the current situations that their country was in, and the two top Secretaries weren’t at each other’s necks nearly as much as usual. In fact, it seemed as if Jefferson had been actually restraining himself from making snide comments toward Hamilton.

“Secretary Hamilton!” Jefferson called out after the meeting had been adjourned. “May I speak with you?”

“Is that not what you’re doing at this moment?” Hamilton closed Eliza’s laptop and gathered his papers together. “And, what you were doing before the meeting?”

“Just come with me to my office.” Thomas sneered, leaving the boardroom.

James raised an eyebrow at Alex, who simply shrugged in response. Who knew what Thomas needed? The man was ever-changing, it seemed, in everything but his political stances.

Alex held the papers and laptop close to him as he walked, to make sure he didn’t lose any of them. They were all important, as was everything Alex wrote.

“What do you need, Jefferson?” Alex asked from the doorway of the man’s office. “You’ve already talked to me today, what else could be so important that you insist on wasting more of my time?”

“I could say the same for you.” Thomas grabbed a stack of papers held together by a binder clip off of his desk. He held them out for Alex to take, continuing, “I wasted more than enough time reading this monstrosity, annotating it just enough to indent the surface. I don’t know how I read it all the way through, but if you send me anything like this again, anything this _awful_ then I will see to it that nothing you ever write makes it through to Congress.”

“What the hell?” Alex asked, grabbing the papers and seeing it was his debt plan. Nearly every word had red writing next to it, saying what exactly was faulty in it. He flipped through it, seeing that there were places where entire paragraphs- no, _pages_ \- were marked off.

“I suggest you rewrite it, but that’s just if you want it to make it through to even the House.” Thomas didn’t let Alex say anything further and just pushed Alex away so he could close his office door.

Alex put the stack of papers with his others and fought the urge to look at it as he walked down the hall. He paused at Eliza’s desk to hand her her laptop, nodding along to whatever she was saying. He didn’t hear her over his own thoughts. His mind was screaming at him about anything and everything concerning his debt plan.

He closed and locked his door after him. His belongings were sitting on his desk, along with a note from Lafayette. He put the note in his bag and he dug out his laptop and journal from the bag. He cleared off everything else on his desk and set down the papers from Thomas.

He tied his hair at the nape of his neck and started reading. Every paragraph he read made him feel sicker and sicker. Thomas’ annotations were cruel but correct. It was a truly shit piece of work and he regretted sending it to anyone.

He took out his journal and started taking notes on the annotations, even though he knew there would be no chance of him throwing away the copy. He felt like shit after the first page was through, but that didn’t stop him. He read more and more and noticed every little flaw in his writing. The first times he read through the draft he didn’t notice them, and they were blatantly obvious to him now.

It took a good forty-five minutes to make it all the way through the first page. He was studying it closely, hanging off of every word that Jefferson wrote. He made notes on every annotation, writing how he could make his next draft better. It needed to be better.

His office phone went off several times throughout the rest of the day, but he ignored the calls and sent them to voicemail every time. He had seventeen pages to get through, and that was just the reading part. He didn’t look away from the papers until he was finished.

Noise outside of his office ceased what seemed to be hours ago, and he was proven correct when he turned on his phone and saw that the time was nearing eleven thirty. At night. He hadn’t planned on spending that much time reviewing all of his mistakes, but once he got started it seemed more than easy to keep going.

Alex had more than a few missed texts, and if it were any other situation he would have ignored them, but he felt that he wouldn’t be taking a break for a while, so this would be the best opportunity to look at them.

 **Le Meilleur:** Alexander, where are you?  
**Le Meilleur:** I know you’re with James and I respect you wanting to stay away, but we will be speaking about this.  
**Le Meilleur:** I brought your work things to your office for you.  
**Le Meilleur:** Are you staying with James again?  
**Le Meilleur:** Have a safe night, Alex. Please come home soon.  
**To: Le Meilleur:** I am safe and well, Laf. Please don’t worry. This is a short explanation and we will talk soon, but just know that all is well.

 **jeffershithead:** I noticed that you were still working when I left the building. I do hope that you’re working to make that monstrosity you gave me at least bearable. I expected more from you, honestly, and that’s saying something.

 **best of wives:** you seemed deep in work when i left, so i didn’t disturb you. have a good night!

 **Mercules Hulligan:** Hey, I know it’s late, but are you still planning on coming to get fitted later this week for a new suit? Just needed to know so I can schedule my other appointments around it.  
**To: Mercules Hulligan:** I don’t think I’ll make it in, I’m sorry Herc. Thank you for thinking of me, though.

He turned his phone back off and returned it to its drawer. He got up from his desk and stretched a bit before walking over to his bookshelf against the wall, that held a coffee machine on it. He started it up and brewed himself a cup, bringing it back to his desk. He figured that he would most likely be working until morning, so he got into his bottom desk drawer and pulled out one of his many spare ties, from times that he used to stay working overnight.

He began to type up a new draft, titling it _rewrite-of-failed-attempt.docx._ He made a title page and a table of contents, figuring that he would be writing quite a bit more than his mere seventeen pages. He would need to if he wanted to correct his previous mistakes.

He downed the rest of his coffee as he went over his notes again. He took his pen and separated his writing into sections; each section would have a different place in the table of contents. With that done, he started actually writing.

Each paragraph he wrote was checked, double checked, and then triple checked. He was too far into his headspace to realize when his phone was ringing and when noise resumed outside of his office, only being brought out of his mind by Eliza unlocking his door and letting herself in.

“I see that you’re already absorbed into your work, Alex,” She said, laying a few papers on his desk, “but these need to be looked over and signed, and your morning meeting begins in fifteen minutes. I thought you’d like to make it to that.”

He put the papers in the second drawer, his only empty one, and unplugged his laptop from the charger.

“Thank you, Betsy.” He placed a kiss on her cheek as he walked by. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Don’t I know it.” She was smiling as she said it, and followed him out of his office, closing the door behind her.

The morning meeting went by not unlike any other- Alex sitting calmly as he berated anything that came out of Jefferson’s mouth, Jefferson getting too angry for his own good. The only difference from any other meeting was the absence of James, but that was soon rectified when the meeting was adjourned and Alex was approached by the small man in the hall.

“Alexander!” A sharp voice made Alex turn from where he was walking. James had his hands full, one with a drink carrier and the other with a brown paper bag.

“James.” He greeted with a head nod and went to turn back on his path, only for James to tell him to stop.

“Let me walk with you.” His tone left no room for argument, so Alex waited for him to catch up.

They walked in a comfortable silence, both giving a small greeting to Eliza as they passed. As soon as they were in Alex’s office, James sat down the bag and drinks on Alex’s desk. He pulled out an apple, banana, and yogurt cup and then picked one of the coffees.

“I figured that you hadn’t eaten anything between your banana yesterday and now, so you will be eating this,” James informed him. “Also, I grabbed you a coffee from Starbucks on my way.”

Alex gave James a small smile. “Thank you James, but you shouldn’t be doing this for me.”

James shook his head and picked up his things again. “If you’re not going to take care of yourself then someone needs to.”

Alex opened the door for him so that he wouldn’t have problems on getting out. “Don’t let Jefferson know that his best friend is helping the enemy, he might just lose whatever sanity he has left.”

“Shove it up your ass, Hamilton.”

“Not really what I like shoved up there, Madison.”

Alex settled back at his desk after closing and relocking his door, organizing the things on his desk. He ate the yogurt so it wouldn’t get warm and start to smell and set the apple and banana by his office phone. He took a drink of the coffee and smiled, the small fact that James had remembered his coffee order bringing him joy.

He opened his laptop back up and began to type again. He only paused his writing for minor things, like having to get up to go to the bathroom or having to make another cup of coffee. This was routine for him, something he hadn’t fallen back into since before he and John were together.

The next few days were all the same to him, and a bit of a blur- he would go to his morning meeting, James would bring him breakfast and coffee, he would write until the next day, and then repeat. The only time there was a slight difference in that sequence was Wednesday night, around one in the morning, when Alex started _thinking_.

Why did he care this much? He shouldn’t care at all what _Jefferson_ said. This wasn’t the first time that he had taken something that Alexander had written and filled it with rude comments and ways that it should be fixed. He didn’t listen to them then, sure, they hurt a bit, but it had never affected him like this.

The last time he had done something like this, had stayed writing this constant to fix something after someone made comments about it, well, that was almost two years ago. It had been when he was pining after John and John went through one of Alex’s writings to explain each and every flaw he saw in it. But, that was because he was in love with John and wanted to impress him by showing him just how much he took his words to heart.

Could he- no, that wasn’t possible. He was just writing this much to win over Jefferson as a political ally. Right? That had to be it. Alex hated Jefferson, that was- well, incorrect. He couldn’t even think to himself that he hated Jefferson anymore. But there was absolute no way he wanted to be anything more than allies with the man. Well, maybe friends. In fact, the more he thought of it, dating would be- awful. It had to be awful.

He shook his head, trying to get the thoughts out of his head. Sure, he hadn’t been in love with John for a long time, that was becoming more and more obvious to him every day he went without him. He couldn’t like Jefferson, though, not like that. Why, then, couldn’t he get the Virginian out of his mind? Obviously, Lafayette and Peggy both seemed to believe he liked him, could he really, though? It would make sense as to why he was putting so much more effort into what he was writing.

He blinked a few times and tried to put it towards the back of his mind, but it kept coming back. He faintly remembered Lafayette telling him once that if you can admit to yourself in a mirror that you like someone, and you still like them after that, you probably actually like them. It was stupid, but he was looking for practically anything to get rid of the small notion in his head that he might like Jefferson. He felt ridiculous as he made his way to the bathrooms as if he was a fifth grader with a schoolboy crush, but he needed to know that he felt nothing other than indifference towards the other man.

He looked at himself in the mirror and shook his head at the situation. He heard himself saying “I like Thomas Jefferson and would not mind dating him” out loud, and instead of incredulous laughing he thought he would hear in his mind, all his subconscious had to say way, _damn right you do._

He tried to put it to the back of his mind again, this time succeeding. He was able to get back to writing just fine, stopping the next time for his morning meeting. During said meeting, all of the other attendees noticed how Alexander stayed suspiciously quiet. He didn’t say a word to, or even look in the vicinity of, Thomas and when the meeting was out, he was the first one out.

The next morning he found himself starting to get a little drowsy, nothing a cup of coffee couldn't fix. He was on to finishing his third revision of all eighty-four pages and was feeling rather confident that it was well written and all mistakes previously made were fixed. He set about printing it when a sharp knock sounded at his office door. He checked his clock, which read seven twenty-three: too early for Eliza reminding him about his meeting. He was going to ignore it, but the person wouldn’t give up.

He opened the door and was pushed aside by Lafayette, James, and Eliza, the latter closing the door behind them.

“What the fuck, Alexander?” Eliza asked with anger and confusion etched across her face. “You’re kidding me, right?”

“Good morning to you three as well.” Alex kept his tone light, although he was more than a little confused as to what she was getting at.

“Don’t you good morning me!” She spat, and Alex was, quite frankly, scared. He had seen Eliza angry before, but never this angry, and for a reason that he didn’t even know of.

“Would someone like to explain what’s going on to me?” Alex asked, walking over to his printer to check on his papers and to escape Eliza’s harsh glare.

“How about you explain something to us, Alex.” To Eliza and Lafayette, Alex was sure James sounded calm, but after having known James for as long as he has, Alex could hear the angry subtones. “Where, exactly, have you been sleeping the last few nights?”

Alex felt like he could start laughing from the question. This was what they were so angry about? Out of all the things they could be, and probably should be, mad at, this was it?

“I’ve been staying here to finish my debt plan.” He said simply, turning back to face them and gesturing at the printer. “I was told by one of my colleagues that it was a monstrosity and needed corrections. So I’ve been spending my time perfecting it.”

Eliza’s glare deepened, Lafayette crossed his arms and leaned against the wall, and James ran a hand through his hair.

“So you’re telling us you haven’t been sleeping for the last five nights?” James’ tone now had more of an angry lilt to it.

“No,” He couldn’t help correcting him, even in the given situation, “I haven’t been sleeping for the past four nights.”

“Fuck you, Alexander,” Eliza deadpanned, “fuck you. We’re worried sick about you because you’ve hardly been leaving your office and won’t answer anyone’s texts, and you’re pulling this shit again.”

“Again?” James turned to her, intrigued on what she meant.

“Yes, again.” She walked up closer to Alex, standing barely two feet away from him, “Last time it was because of something John said, so what is it this time? Did the Baron make you feel like you weren’t good enough? Did someone barely make a statement about how something might be a little wrong with your writing?”

“No, Eliza,” He backed away a bit, not wanting to be so close when she was so angry, “I got pages upon pages telling me everything that was wrong with it, for your information. Jefferson made sure I knew that for every one thing I wrote, two things were wrong with it.”

She threw up her hands and walked to the other side of the office, seeing that he was uncomfortable but not stopping with her onslaught of words. The other two men watched as if it were a tennis match, James with borderline anger, whereas Lafayette looked to be studying.

“Since when do you give two fucks about what Jefferson says?” She exclaimed, raising her voice even more, to almost a shouting point. “I could maybe understand why you did it when it was John, but that was because you were head over heels in fucking love with him! Why the fuck are you suddenly caring about Jefferson; it’s not like you feel any other emotion but hatred for him!”

“But what if I do?” Alex raised his voice right along with her, getting riled up. He knew she was doing it because she wanted a reaction out of him, but he wasn’t going to stop. His face was red from frustration as he asked, “What if I do have emotions for him other than hate?”

“Like what?” She was never one to be outdone, and she made sure of that as she raised her voice even further.

“Maybe I'm starting to feel the same fucking things for Jefferson as I used to for John!” He shouted right back, tears welling in his eyes as they always seem to do when he's frustrated. “Maybe I fucking like him, and maybe I have a schoolboy crush on him! How should you know? Why would you know? Who fucking knows, because I sure as hell, don't! How could that be possible when all I'm supposed to feel is hatred towards him?”

That quieted Eliza right up. She blinked at him a few times, and the other men in the room found themselves just as shocked. All anger was gone from James’ mind and although he was still upset with Alex, Lafayette found himself losing a bit of the turmoil from his mind.

“Do you?” Was all Eliza could find herself to say, her voice barely louder than a whisper.

“I don’t know.” He responded, still a little louder than a talking voice, but softer than he was. “Maybe? I think so? I-”

“Your papers are done being printed out.” Eliza interrupted, seeing the discomfort on his face.

“I need to go take them to Jefferson,” Alex replied, but making no move to grab them.

“After you do, you’re taking the rest of the day off,” James informed him.

“We still have group night, since it’s Friday,” Eliza said before Alex could disagree. “It’ll be at Aaron’s, and we told him that you would be over early. Laf can drive you over, and then you can catch up on sleep.”

Alex didn’t see a point in arguing for once and went to grab the papers. He secured them with a binder clip and turned back to his three friends.

“Gil, if you don’t hate me, would you mind coming with me to drop these off?” Alex asked, his voice uncharacteristically timid.

“Je ne déteste pas tu, l'amour,” Lafayette spoke for the first time in the encounter, pushing himself off of the wall he was leaning on, “c'est simplement que je suis déçu. I guess we have quite a bit of paper to deliver to Jefferson, then.”

Thomas didn’t hear whatever response there was, as he quickly moved from the place he was hiding outside of Alexander’s office, not wanting to be caught listening in on the previous conversation.


	9. never have i ever hated you

**Burr:** I don’t know if you’re busy tonight, but you seemed to have had a stressful week and I’m having a few (seven or eight?) people over tonight if you would like to come by after work.  
**To: Burr:** Who are the people?  
**Burr:** The Schuyler sisters, Gilbert Lafayette, Hercules Mulligan, John Laurens, Maria Reynolds, and Hamilton.  
**To: Burr:** I’ll be there after I finish up my work. Thank you for inviting me.  
**Burr:** Of course. I figured you needed something to unwind from this week, and I also seem to be outnumbered by Democrats when I’m with them. You count for at least 10 Republicans.

Thomas rolled his eyes as he set down his phone. Burr wasn’t the ideal friend by any means; if you could even call him that. He was always trying to get something, and never did anything if it didn’t benefit him in some way. That was a quality that Thomas respected, but he didn’t respect someone who was afraid to show how he feels about anything. If there was ever something that needed an opinion, Burr would be the last person you would want to talk to.

Thomas set his pen back with the others. He tidied up his desk, not wanting a single thing out of place. His desk was in meticulous condition and he intended to keep it that way. He picked up Hamilton’s debt plan and hit it against the desk a few times, getting all of the together and neat.

The debt plan had definitely improved, Thomas had to give him that. There were things that needed to be improved still, but it was much better than the initial draft. As much as he hated to admit it, Hamilton was an excellent writer, his ideas were just, well, awful.

He put his laptop in his bag and gathered the few things he was taking home with him. While he was exiting the building, his thoughts began to swarm his mind. He had managed to keep it cool when Hamilton had brought him the debt plan, but would he be able to be with him for that long without letting it spill that he knew? He needed things to stay how they were between the two of him, the last few days he had already let his emotions get the best of him.

Thomas had known it was a big risk when he let Hamilton into his home, both times. He knew it was a risk because he knew his feelings flat out. There was a time, not that long ago, where very frankly, he considered himself in love with Hamilton. It was unrequited, of course, because Hamilton had James. And then he had Eliza. And then it was Maria, then James, then Angelica again, then it was James yet again, and most recently it had been John. At some point, he had probably also had Lafayette. He always had someone, whereas Thomas rarely had anyone.

Very early into his knowing Hamilton, he had learned to put his feelings aside because the man was an idiot; someone needed to put him in his place. It hurt him when he saw Hamilton and one of his significant others, but he didn’t let that bother his work. He couldn’t let it. Not when, if it weren’t for him, the government would fall through with no one to oppose Hamilton.

He had finally managed to convince himself that he didn’t have feelings for Alexander. For a while after that, he was with James, but then James ended it before it hardly began. He told Thomas that he wasn’t going to be with him, not when Thomas was ‘in love’ with Alexander. Still, Thomas kept those feelings under wraps, because he just had to. He needed to be Alexander’s political rival because otherwise, he wouldn’t have anything with him. The love was most certainly unrequited, and in Thomas’ perfect world, it always would be, so that it would never affect his work like it almost had in the beginning. But _no_ , then Hamilton just _had_ to start thinking he had feelings for Thomas. And Thomas just _had_ to hear that conversation.

He pulled out of the parking lot, Hamilton still on his mind. Could he push these feelings away, like he had all of those other times? He had to. He had to find a way. He did it for years now, what was the difference now?

 _The difference now is that you have some reassurance that he feels the same._ His subconscious scolded. _The difference now is that you let him into your home, you let him open up to you, hell, you let him cry in your arms. The difference now is that you might actually have a chance with him._

He shook his head in an effort that it would clear away his thoughts. It didn’t help all that much, but it at least cleared a bit of room for him to put new thoughts.

 _You don’t have a shot with him._ He tried to tell himself. _Nothing is different now, for all you know, he could have just been lying to get his friends off of his back. You don’t have a shot with him. Nothing is different now, he was probably just lying to get his friends off of his back._

Thomas repeated those words in his head until he pulled up in Burr’s driveway. He knew where the man lived from a previous project the two had done together and was really just hoping he hadn’t moved. He figured it was the right location, based on the cars parked outside. He made sure anything valuable was hidden in the car and exited, locking the car and pocketing the keys.

He took a few deep breaths to center himself before he rang the doorbell. Within a few moments, the door was being opened by Burr himself, a smile that Thomas was not familiar with on his face.

“Thomas!” He cheerfully said, stepping back from the door to let him in. “I didn’t think you’d be here that quickly.”

“Please tell me that you mean Thomas Paine.” Hamilton’s voice came from inside.

“I was already finished at work.” Thomas replied, choosing to ignore Hamilton’s comment. “Again, thank you for inviting me.”

Thomas stepped into the house and Aaron closed the door behind him, just as Lafayette said, “You are the worst, Burr,” and threw a pillow at him. He caught it with ease, throwing it back towards the Frenchman, but missing and hitting Peggy instead.

“Laf’s point is proved.” Angelica joked with him.

“You’re supposed to be on my side, Ange.” Burr stuck his tongue out at her, much like a middle schooler would. Thomas could tell that Aaron was smitten with her, but couldn’t tell yet if Angelica felt the same.

The atmosphere seemed very relaxed but tense at the same time. He could sense a bit of tension between John and Alex, who were on opposite sides of the room, and definitely tension between Thomas and Alex. However, at the same time, the friend group seemed to all be happy and relaxed.

Everyone was sat on the floor with a shot glass in front of them, several two liters of soda in the middle of the circle. Angelica had an empty spot next to her, presumably Aaron’s spot. Next to Angelica was Peggy, who was sitting nearly on top of Lafayette. Next to them was Alexander, with another empty spot by him. On the other side of Aaron’s spot was John and Hercules, who were talking to each other in hushed voices. Then, between Hercules and the other empty space was Eliza and Maria, Eliza on Maria’s lap.

Aaron sat down by Angelica like Thomas thought he would, and gestured to the spot by Alex. “I told them I was having someone else come over, so we saved you a spot.”

Thomas made his way over to the spot, feeling more than one pair of eyes on him as he did so. He carefully sat down as to not knock over the shot glasses. He sat the furthest he could away from Hamilton without drawing attention, but still enough to leave a considerable amount of space between the two of them.

“We’re playing Never Have I Ever!” Peggy cheerfully said. “Except we play with soda because we have a few borderline alcoholics among us, but it’s still fun!”

Thomas looked closer at the liquid in the glasses and saw that yes, it was soda.

“I am not an alcoholic.” Hercules responded almost immediately, pausing his conversation with John.

“Same here.” Maria piped up. “I can stop whenever I’d like.”

“I was actually talking about Alex.” Peggy tucked a piece of hair behind her ear as she talked. “But, yeah, you guys, too.”

“I’m not an alcoholic.” Alex wrinkled his nose at the term. “An alcoholic is someone who relates to alcoholism, and alcoholism is an addiction to the consumption of alcohol, or the men-”

“You’re an alcoholic, next topic.” Thomas interrupting, causing a few snickers throughout the room and a glare from Alex. “Who starts the game?”

It was silent for a few moments before Hercules’ free hand flew to his nose and he shouted, “Nose goes!”

The rest of the group soon followed, until Lafayette was the only one without his finger on his nose.

“What is this?” He asked, confused on the custom. Although he had been in America for years, there were still occasional things that he was confused on.

“You’re going first, dearest.” Peggy smiled at her boyfriend’s confusion, patting him on the shoulder.

He narrowed his eyes, thinking of a question that would get one of his friends. He looked around the room and then stopped, looking directly at Alexander sitting next to him.

“Never have I ever had a, how you say, threesome?” Lafayette smirked as Alex began coughing.

Alex awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck as he downed the soda, as did Maria and Eliza. Lafayette laughed wildly and clapped his hands, throwing his head back as he laughed.

“Next question!” Eliza’s voice was an octave higher than usual and Maria’s face was bright red as she buried it in Eliza’s back.

“No!” Angelica protested. “Explain!”

“I mean, I’m open to explaining mine, if they explain theirs.” Alex shrugged; his initial shock of the question was over.

“Not happening.” Maria groaned.

“Do it, do it, do it!” Hercules started chanting.

“I’ll make you two a deal.” Alex turned towards them, looking past Thomas. “I’ll tell one of my stories, you two tell yours because I’m sure it’s together. Or, you know, I could just spill the beans myself.”

Maria protested at the same time that Eliza agreed, and Alex began talking.

“I’ve had two,” He told the group, “the first one was in college with two guys, one named Mark and the other was Tyler. And the other one, since Maria and Eliza don’t want to speak up, was with them towards the end of mine and Eliza’s relationship.”

Lafayette, Hercules, and John all began laughing at Maria and Eliza’s discomfort, already having known the story, whereas the other two Schuyler sister’s stared at their sister in shock. Thomas didn’t really know how to feel and found himself waiting for the next question.

“Okay!” Alex poured himself, Eliza, and Maria more soda as he spoke. “My darling Marie, never have I ever copulated with every person sitting in this room.”

Lafayette pursed his lips and downed the soda from his glass. “Fuck you, Alexander.”

“You’ve done it before.” Alex laughed. “Your turn, Tommy boy.”

Thomas narrowed his eyes as he looked down at the short man. “Call me that again and I won’t hesitate to slap you.”

“Kinky.” Peggy mused, Lafayette hitting her shoulder lightly and Eliza sending her a warning look. Alex’s cheeks turned red and he turned away from Thomas, looking everywhere but him. _Curiouser and curiouser._

Thomas thought for a few seconds on his question. The questions so far weren’t exactly the most innocent and Thomas didn’t exactly want to change that. However, there wasn’t much that Thomas couldn’t say he hadn’t done. However, there were many people, in this room especially, that he hadn’t done.

“Never have I ever had sex with more than one person sitting in this room.” Thomas stated, watching as every other person in the room took a drink.

“Damn, Thomas, way to hit low.” Aaron commented, his tone praising as he took a drink.

“This seems to be a very intimate friend group.” Thomas fought off a laugh. “Would anyone like to fess up?”

Alex shrugged, his embarrassment from earlier gone. “I mean, personally, I’ve fucked Gil, Peggy, Angelica, Aaron, Maria, Eliza, John, and Hercules.”

Thomas’ eyes grew. “Holy fuck, man.”

“You had sex with my sister?” Angelica looked bewildered towards Alexander.

“He fucked both of you and you don’t hear me complaining.” Peggy rolled her eyes. “I’ve had sex with Laf and Alex, in case anyone would like to know. Oh, also Hercules once.”

“Can we go onto the next question?” John asked with that being first thing he had said to the group since Thomas arrived. He felt as if John didn’t like him, but he didn’t care about it in the slightest, as long as he was honest with himself.

“Certainly.” Maria spoke up. “Never have I ever fucked a horse.”

“I was drunk and I humped one horse statue!” Hercules raised his voice, although his face showed nothing but a joking expression.

This is how the game went on for the next few questions. The group targeted certain members, trying to get them to admit their secrets and not-so-secrets it seemed. All was going well, everyone getting along, and it seemed that everyone was happy, Thomas included.

After a while, he relaxed by Alexander, finding himself sitting closer than before. John shot the two of them looks but said nothing. Every so often, Thomas would find himself staring at Hamilton for just moments too long, getting entranced by his laugh, or the way his hair looked, or the way his eyes reflected what was around him and shone with purpose. Thomas always looked around to make sure no one caught him, and he thought he was in the clear, and after every time, he would find himself repeating his mantra from the car.

An irritating ringtone brought Thomas out of his thoughts as Alex sheepishly took his phone out of his pocket.

“Sorry, guys. I forgot to silence it.”

He went to deny the call but found himself staring at a number that looked familiar. It wasn’t saved in his phone, but the digits looked familiar.

“Does anyone know the area code 609?” He asked quickly, not wanting to miss the call if it was important.

“If you don’t know it, don’t answer it.” Peggy answered simply, at the same time that Jefferson answered, telling him it was the area code for Princeton, New Jersey.

“I need to take this.” Alex said, all blood suddenly drained from his face. He got up and answered the call as he walked, going outside and shutting the door tightly behind him.

Once he was outside, not a single moment passed before Thomas found himself being questioned by Lafayette and Eliza.

“What do you know?” Eliza asked, all traces of her motherly kindness gone.

“What do you mean?” Thomas countered, praying to God that they didn’t know he had heard their earlier conversation.

“Did Madison tell you?” Lafayette questioned, his grip on Peggy’s hip tightening ever so slihgtly. The rest of the group watched silently, not wanting to get between Eliza and Lafayette while they were angry, but also wanting to know what was going on.

“Tell me what?” Thomas felt his blood run cold, knowing that his prayers hadn’t worked. However, he was going to try his hardest to play it off for as long as he could.

“Maybe he doesn’t know.” Lafayette looked at Eliza, calmer than his female counterpart. She could be full of fury when she needed, and he felt bad for Thomas being on the receiving end, however, if he did know? Well, that deserved Eliza’s fury.

“No, he knows.” Eliza firmly stated. “I’ve seen how he’s been looking at Alex, he definitely knows.”

“What do I know?” Thomas asked, trying to put as much emotion as he needed into his voice.

Lafayette narrowed his eyes, seeing through his friend’s fake emotions. “No, you do know, don’t you? But Madison didn’t tell you, you heard, didn’t you? You were eavesdropping, weren’t you?”

Thomas took a moment too long to respond, and before he knew it, Eliza was getting off of Maria’s lap and reaching over to Thomas, slapping him hard enough to make his head snap to the side. He held his cheek in his hand, cringing although he knew he deserved it.

“You are going to tell him you heard.” Lafayette instructed. “Also, I can’t believe you stooped that low, enfoiré.”

“If someone would like to explain what’s going on, yeah, that’d be great.” Angelica quipped, trying (and failing) to hide the amusement (and slight pride) on her face from the slap delivered to Thomas.

“Thomas here-” Eliza started, getting interrupted by the front door reopening.

Alex looked as if he had just seen a ghost. His phone was in his hand by his side, the screen still on. His hair was messed up as if he had run his hands through it repeatedly, and his face was void of any color.

“I’m really sorry, guys, but I have to go.” His voice was shaky as he spoke and his eyes looked glassy as if he were about to cry.

“Where are you going, Alex?” Eliza asked, tilting her head slightly to the side. “It’s nearly eight, can’t it wait until morning?”

“No, it can’t.” He shook his head, making a move to go to the door.

“Alexander, don’t you dare.” Angelica warned, sending an apologetic look to Aaron. She was sure he didn’t want to be in the middle of this, but sometimes, the drama just came along with the friends.

“You don’t understand, I need to go.” His voice was stronger this time, but if he was facing them then they would have seen the tear escaping his eye.

Eliza stood up and walked over to him, grabbing him gently by the shoulder. “Alex and I are going into one of the bedrooms to talk, is that alright, Aaron?”

“Go right ahead.”

Eliza led him down the hall, leaving a crack in the door instead of shutting it completely. An awkward silence fell over the group before Hercules broke it for them.

“You said Thomas had eavesdropped on something?” He asked Lafayette, who nodded his head. Hercules turned to Thomas then, gesturing towards the door. “You’ve gotta be good for something, then. I’d say she left it open for a reason.”

“He’s probably not wrong.” Peggy agreed, and a few more people agreed. Eliza never did anything without a purpose.

“Go on then.” John repeated Hercules’ earlier gesture. He may not like Thomas, but he’d rather send Thomas to listen and take the risk that that might be why Eliza left the door open than going himself and risking that that wasn’t why she left it open.

Thomas didn’t disagree with them and stood up, walking over to the room. He stood as close as he could to the door without the risk of it creaking, well aware of everyone’s eyes on him as he listened.

“-just have to.” Alexander’s voice sounded smaller than it had previously.

“No, you don’t, Alex.” Eliza’s soothing voice replied. “It was his mistake, you don’t need to go and fix it. He needs to do that on his own.”

“But he’s family, I can’t just abandon family like that.” Alex protested weakly.

“There’s no way I’m letting you drive up there on your own.” Her voice was harder this time, and even though he wasn’t in there, Thomas knew that she was probably giving Alex a stern look. “It’s a three and a half hour drive, and you haven’t slept for longer than that in five days. I’d rather have an upset friend than a dead one.”

“Then I’ll get a taxi.” Alex sounded like he was on the verge of begging. “Please, Eliza. I want to do this with your permission, even though we both know that I’ll still do it if I don’t have it.”

“The fees will be far too much for it to be worth it. Besides, where would you stay?” She raised her voice for the next part, making it obvious to Thomas that she had left the door cracked for this reason specifically. “If there was someone that would go with you, then I might allow it, but there’s not, so you’re not going, Alexander.”

Thomas knew what she wanted, but didn’t exactly know if he’d be able to. He certainly wouldn’t mind the drive, and that was the hard part. He wanted to go up there, he wanted to help out Alex, but he didn’t know if he’d be able to keep his subconscious quiet and convinced the whole way there and back. However, he needed to redeem himself in the eyes of Eliza and Lafayette (he would never admit it, but it was a pride thing), and this was a seemingly easy way to do it. He took a deep breath and pushed the door open, letting himself in.

“Could I be of some assistance?”

“No.” Alex responded without a second of thought. “Most certainly not.”

“Thomas, what a surprise that you happen to be here.” Eliza’s voice dripped sarcasm, but her eyes spoke thanks.

“Three and a half hours isn’t that long.” Thomas spoke carefully, trying to choose his words in a way that wouldn’t anger Alex anymore.

“It is when you hate me.” Alex bit back.

Thomas fought the urge to place his hands on Alex’s shoulders and turn him to look at him face to face as he spoke. “I’ve told you before and I’m sure I’ll have to tell you again, but I don’t hate you.”

“Look at you two, all is well then, it seems.” Eliza spoke before Alex could get the chance to. “Ultimately, it _is_ Alex’s decision if you go up there with him or not. However, Alexander, I will let you go if you’re with Thomas, and I won’t say another ill word about you going up there to help _him_.”

Alex looked between the two, not stupid enough to not realize that they had set this up, but not mentally stable enough to care. A few minutes passed through what seemed like an eternity to Thomas before Alex finally responded, “Can we stop by my apartment before we leave?”

“Of course, I don’t see why we wouldn’t.” Thomas said almost immediately.

Alex nodded. “We need to get going, then.” 


	10. prelude of the jhj storm

Thomas parked the car but left it running. He looked over at Hamilton sitting in the passenger seat, leg bouncing.

“I need to run into my apartment, are you fine out here for a few minutes?” He asked, a little cautious of leaving him alone. No matter how many times he had been asked if he was fine, Hamilton still looked on edge and about to break down at any given moment.

Hamilton made a few vague hand gestures. “I’m not a child, mind you. I’ll be perfectly fine.”

Thomas opened his mouth to make a comment but then closed it, deeming the argument not worth it. He got out of the car and left Hamilton alone.

Alex was shaking. His chest felt constricted and his mind was racing. So many thoughts were going through his mind, but he couldn’t pinpoint any single ones. His mind never stayed in one place for more than a few seconds before jumping to other topics, none of which were good. His head was throbbing and he felt like he was about to pass out. The car felt like it was far too small and Alex felt borderline trapped.

He got out his phone, his fingers shaking as he did so. He had a text from Lafayette, who was coincidentally who he needed to talk to.

 **Le Meilleur:** Eliza explained what was going on; I don’t like that you’re helping him still. Tu es mieux que cela.  
**To: Le Meilleur:** i have to help him, he’s the only family i’ve got. i’m not texting you for a lecture, though  
**Le Meilleur:** Es-tu d’accord? Did Thomas do something?  
**To: Le Meilleur:** no where is my anxiety medication  
**Le Meilleur:** Alexander.  
**To: Le Meilleur:** i know you have it, please gil

Alex’s focus was taken away from his phone by Thomas opening the trunk to his car, throwing a bag in it. When he got back in the driver’s seat, Alex noticed that he had changed from his work attire to more casual clothing.

“Next to your apartment, then to Princeton.” He said, keeping his voice light as he backed out of the parking stall. “I booked a hotel because whatever it is that needs to be done is going to need to wait until morning; it’ll be too late when we get there.”

“How did you do it so fast?” His voice was much more stable than he was expecting it to come out, and for that he was grateful. He didn’t bother arguing with Thomas on booking a hotel; he figured that since he was doing him a favor that meant the world to Alex, he could at least be civil.

“I looked up hotels in Princeton while I was in the elevator,” Thomas said, noticing Alexander’s shaking hands and how his voice was weaker than usual. “I dialed one while I got into my apartment, I used the ‘I’m Thomas Jefferson’ card while I grabbed a bag and clothes, and the conversation was over by the time I fed my cat.”

Alex didn’t answer this time and instead just nodded. He bounced his leg up and down, trying to focus on something outside of his mind. His mind was racing and his body couldn't catch up, he still felt like the car was far too small and he was starting to feel trapped. He curled his hands into fists, only releasing them when he realized that his nails were digging in too sharply to his palms.

Sooner than he was expecting, Thomas was parking at Alex’s apartment complex.

“Do you want to come in? I might be a few minutes,” Alex asked, his voice showing barely any inflection.

Thomas weighed his options. On one hand, Alex looked like he was going to collapse at any given moment. On the other, it might be best for him to have some space to himself. The worry that came along with imagining something happening to Alex from his current state outweighed any other options, and Jefferson found himself agreeing to come in.

He didn’t question it when Alex opted to take the stairs instead of the elevator. He didn’t question it when Alex went to open the door to his apartment and it was already unlocked. He didn’t question it when Alex beelined for what looked like the bathroom as soon as they were inside the apartment, but Thomas was starting to think that he should have.

He took out his phone from his pocket as it began to ring. The screen bore a picture of him and Lafayette the last time they traveled together, along with the name **Faux Royauté**.

“We haven’t even left DC yet, what could you possibly need?” Thomas greeted, keeping his tone fairly light. He meant it in a joking manner but figured that it was something revolving around Alexander.

“I need you to do me a favor,” Lafayette spoke rushed and his voice lacked any emotion other than complete earnest. “Rapidement s'il te plaît.”

“What do you need?” Thomas looked over towards the bathroom, where he could hear Alex looking through the cabinets.

“Last door on the right side of the hallway. That’s my bedroom. In my nightstand, there is an envelope that has Alexander’s name on it. I need you to get that to him quickly.” Lafayette instructed. “It is an open envelope, but do not look at the contents.”

“What’s in it?” Thomas questioned, making his way into the bedroom. He got to the nightstand and found the envelope rather easily; the only other belongings in the nightstand were condoms.

“Ce n'est pas pour moi de dire. Just get it to him.” His voice sounded like his patience was running thin. “Keep a careful eye on Alexander, Thomas. If he comes back and he’s not okay, I’m putting the blame on you.”

Thomas wasn’t able to respond before Lafayette hung up, leaving the man to give the envelope to Alexander.

He first knocked on the door, but that was proven futile when the only response was a muffled and broken response of Alex telling him to go away. Instead of wasting time trying to reason with the man he knew to be more stubborn than a mule, Thomas tried the doorknob next, surprised to find it unlocked.

The cabinets were all open; items lying askew around the bathroom. The sink was trickling and a few items were falling into the drops of water left behind. Alex himself was sitting on the toilet seat, his legs tucked up to his chest. His hair was wild, his eyes looked like they were wet, and his whole body seemed to be trembling.

“Go away.” Alex quietly said, no real motivation behind his words. Thomas didn’t know how someone as strong as Hamilton seemed could break down this easily and this quickly, but he had grown up with an older sister that had debilitating anxiety; he knew that it worked in crazy ways.

“Lafayette told me to give this to you.” Thomas thrust his hand holding the envelope out to Alex.

He ignored the envelope and looked passed it to Thomas. “Why do you insist on helping me all of the time when you hate me?”

“I don’t hate you,” He tried to keep the exasperation from his voice to no avail, “we’ve gone over that. Just take the envelope, Alexander.”

He unwrapped one of his arms from around his knees and hesitantly grabbed the envelope. He unwrapped his other arm to take the contents out. It was a letter, and as Alex read, Thomas could see a visible reaction in the man. His shoulders seemed to relax slightly, his breathing seemed to even out, and the panicked look in Alex’s eyes dissipated.

Alex put the letter back in the envelope, not at all surprised that it had calmed him so quickly. It always helped, no matter the situation, it just had that effect on him. He took a few deep breaths before he stood up, knowing that he was dehydrated and having a breakdown wasn’t exactly helping him out.

“Whatever happens between us, will that stay between us?” Alex asked, unwanting of anyone to know how pathetic he was.

Jefferson was quick to nod his head; he may be a dick, but he would never go that far. “Of course.”

“Good.” Alex didn’t let himself overthink his next actions, wrapping his arms around Thomas without a second thought. It just seemed right in the moment.

“You’re going to get your tears all over my shirt, asshole.” Thomas’ voice was full of jest. He gingerly hugged Alex back, going against every thought in his head. He knew that he shouldn’t be getting this close to him, that he couldn’t. He needed to stay cold and disconnected from Alexander; it would make it easier when he would inevitably be told that everything he had overheard was a ruse. He couldn’t let himself get close, couldn’t let himself fall in love with Alexander again, but at the same time, he just couldn’t help himself.

Alex was the first to break away, mumbling something about needing to grab some stuff as he skillfully walked around Thomas, hiding his red cheeks as he did so. He couldn’t risk the teasing that would come with it. All earlier doubts about _maybe_ liking Thomas went out the window as he embrace the man; he felt his heart flutter as he did so, and that was not a good thing. He needed to snap out of whatever crush he may have because there was no way Thomas felt the same; Thomas hated him and he needed to get that through his head.

He changed from his suit for the first time all week, spraying himself down in cheap body spray as he did so. He changed into a pair of jeans he found at the back of his dresser and one of his larger sweaters, feeling like his emotions would be all over the place for the rest of the night. His sweaters always provided him with warmth and comfort. That was the hard part about being off of all of his meds; he had little to no control over what his emotions did and where they went, and he hated that.  

He grabbed a nicer change of clothes along with a crappier change and threw them into a cinch bag he had lying around, along with a phone charger. He shouldered the bag and closed his bedroom door tightly behind him, joining Thomas back in the living room.

“I picked up the bathroom and put the letter and envelope back in Lafayette’s room.” He informed Alex. “Are you ready?”

He gave a nod of confirmation and led the way out of the apartment. It was silent between them until they were walking out of the apartment complex.

“Why do you say that you don’t hate me?” Alex asked, his voice uncharacteristically timid.

“Because I don’t.” Thomas shrugged, getting into his car. “I truly don’t hate you.”

“Then why do you act like you do?” Alex questioned further, his voice gaining confidence. “Why do you act like my enemy every time we set foot into a political setting? I read and analyzed each of your annotations on my debt plan. It sure seems like you hate me from that.”

“I can’t answer that.” Thomas prayed silently in his head that Alex would just drop it, even though he knew that wouldn’t happen.

“You can’t answer it because you hate me.”

“No, I can’t answer it because I can’t answer it.”

“Just answer it then, if you don’t hate me.”

Thomas spared a glance over to Alexander, who was looking expectantly at him, He wasn’t going to drop it anytime soon. Thomas felt himself grip the steering wheel tighter as he said, “Alexander, I act as your enemy because if I’m not that, then I’m nothing to you.”

Thomas ignored Alex’s onslaught of questions, trying his hardest to block him out. After a few minutes, Alex fell silent and the only distraction found in the vehicle was Alex’s leg, bouncing up and down.

“Stop fidgeting, Alex.” Thomas instructed, staring ahead at the vast expanse of road.

“It’s harder than it sounds.” Alex’s leg didn’t stop bouncing, no, instead Alex’s hand started tapping on his leg as well.

“Alex.” His voice held an unspoken warning of sorts, what the warning was, he had no idea.

No response came this time, but Thomas could still see the limbs moving from his peripheral vision.

Thomas reached out with his hand closest to Alex and placed it on his leg and over his hand, finding an odd sense of pride when the leg stopped bouncing and the hand stopped tapping.

“Thank you.” His voice was smug and he definitely didn’t miss it when Alex childishly stuck his tongue out at him.

At some point, Alex had turned the radio on, but it wasn’t loud enough that Thomas’ phone wasn’t heard when it dinged from the dashboard where it had been set.

“Can you check who that was?” Thomas asked, well aware of the amount of trust he was placing in Alex.

Alex moved his hand out from under Thomas’ but didn’t move away Thomas’ hand. H grabbed the phone and turned it on, squinting at the bright light.

“It says that it’s in a group chat.” Alex snorted at the name. “Jeffersiblings?”

“Shit.” Thomas muttered, hitting the steering wheel lightly. His siblings never talked this late and normally were asleep early. On one hand, he didn’t want to give Alex his phone’s passcode to look at the texts, and by default, access to anything else on his phone, but he also didn’t exactly like looking at his phone while driving. When it dinged again, Thomas gave Alex his passcode so he could hear what the texts said.

“Okay, there’s two here, the screen name is ‘EJeffs’?” Alex’s voice trailed up at the end, but he kept speaking. “Their first message says that they would like it if you would come to Virginia for the week of Thanksgiving so they can have a family Thanksgiving at Monticello. The second message says that you should bring your boyfriend.”

“And she’s using the group chat because I can’t say no in front of all of my siblings without looking like a dick, okay.” Thomas rolled his eyes at nothing in particular. “Tell her that I’ll be there, with my boyfriend. Also, tell her to go to sleep, she has a family for Christ’s sake.”

Hamilton typed out the response but felt his blood go cold at Thomas’ response. Of course he had a boyfriend, it was Thomas Jefferson for crying out loud. There was no way he’d be single.

“What’s your boyfriend’s name?” Alex tried to play it off as nonchalant, as to keep Jefferson from being suspicion.

He was suddenly hyper-aware of the hand on his leg as Jefferson sighed, squeezing Alex’s leg without exactly realizing he was doing so. “I don’t actually have a boyfriend, but my family all thinks I do. I’ll figure something out. Maybe I’ll tell them that he got sick or something.”

Sometimes Alexander really hated the fact that whereas many people had a brain to mouth filter, he did not. This was one of those times. He wasn’t even completely aware that he was talking as he said, “Or you could get someone to pretend to be your boyfriend for the week. Hell, I’d do it.”

Thomas furrowed his eyebrows together in confusion. He looked far ahead on the road and around them, just to make sure they were completely safe before he looked over for Hamilton for a few seconds. “You would? Why would you do that? Just a week ago you were saying how you’d never step foot in the same house with me for a week.”

“I mean, yeah, I guess I would.” Alex felt the tension as it grew thicker in the vehicle. “Things can change in a week. Whole wars can be started.”

Eager to change the subject before it could get more awkward between the two of them, Alex asked, “Are all of the Jefferson siblings as lame as you? Judging from the ‘Jeffersiblings’ group chat, I could tell that you and ‘EJeffs’ have similarities.”

Thomas felt relieved as the subject was changed and the tension was released. They would obviously have to talk about it at a later date, but he preferred it to not be in a car that they were stuck in for the next two hours and forty-five minutes.

“I’d hope Elizabeth and I were somewhat similar, she is my twin.” He smiled thinking about her, along with his other siblings. It had been well over a year since he had seen all of them together, and five months since the last time he saw his twin. “There are seven of us in total. You don’t have any siblings, do you, Alexander?”

Thomas cursed himself as he felt the tension return just as quickly as it had left.

“I do, actually,” Alex breathed deeply, trying to keep his anxiety from earlier at bay. “He’s actually who I need to see in Princeton.”

Thomas could tell that Alex needed to talk, but he could also tell that his anxiety was coming back; he had the same tells that his older sister did. He didn’t think twice about grabbing his hand, something that had always stabilized her.

“Why do your friends not like him?” Thomas asked carefully, knowing that one little thing could set him off.

Alex gripped Thomas’ hand tightly as he spoke. “James wasn’t the greatest while we were growing up. Called me worthless, useless; would lock me outside in the rain for days on end. He even locked me out in one of the early days of the hurricane that hit. When we moved, he had gotten better to some extent because I was the reason we were here, and I thought he changed completely. So far in my adult life, he has taken my money, scammed me out of many things, got married and had kids without telling me of either, and then told me I was a bad influence and so I’ve never met his family.”

Thomas remained silent for a moment. It was a lot to process and he didn’t want to say the wrong thing. He was pissed that someone had treated Alexander like that, but he didn’t want to anger to show in his voice.

“Why the-” He paused before trying again. “Why are you going to see him, then?”

Alex shrunk back. He felt like Thomas was disappointed in him, just like everyone else was when he brought up James. He was used to Thomas being disappointed in him- well, actually, no. He was used to _Jefferson_ being disappointed in him. He hadn’t felt Thomas being disappointed in him, and this was something far more intimate than little workplace spats.

“He’s got himself in jail and needs someone to bail him out, again.” He muttered, barely loud enough for Thomas to hear. “I know you’re upset with me, everyone is when I bring him up. But he’s the only family I have, and I’m not just going to leave him there.”

“I’m not upset with you!” Thomas immediately spoke. He rubbed comforting circles on the back of Alex’s hand with his thumb, in hopes of calming him down. “I’m upset that someone would treat their sibling like that; no one deserves that. I understand you wanting to help him, though.”

Neither of them talked for a few minutes. Thomas was worried that Alex thought he was upset with him and Alex was worried that Thomas was lying to him about being upset. Eventually, though, the silence was broken by Thomas.

“You should probably get some sleep.” He told the smaller man. “We still have two and a half hours to go. I read through your new debt plan, and I’d like to think that I’ve known you long enough that I know your work habits; there was no way you slept while you were working on that.”

“Sleep is for the weak.” Alex mumbled the same words he had been spouting since he was a teen.

“Yes, well, you haven’t slept for a week.” Thomas rebuted. “Sleep, Alex, I’ll wake you when we’re there.”

Alex rested his cheek against the cool glass of the car. “You know what’s weird?”

“What?”

“It’s weird that a week and a few heart to hearts changed us from Hamilton and Jefferson to Alex and Thomas.” 


	11. the jhj storm

Alex woke suddenly to being dropped. It wasn’t exactly a hard surface that he was being dropped onto, so instead of allowing it to fully wake him, he attempted to curl up in a ball and go back to sleep. His plan seemed to be working well until Thomas began shaking him.

“Wake up, Hamilton.” Thomas shook his shoulder a bit harder, producing an irritated groan from Alex.

“Alex or Alexander.” He mumbled, putting one of his arms over his face.

“Hm?” Thomas moved the arm away from Alex’s face and tried to maneuver him out of his ball.

“Call me Alex or Alexander. None of that ‘Hamilton’ bullshit.” He suddenly sat straight up, nearly head-butting Thomas. “Why can’t I sleep?”

“For one, there’s only one bed, so we’re going to have to share.” Thomas backed away a bit from Alex, his personal space bubble having been destroyed. “For two, Gilbert texted me and told me that you need to take out your contacts before you sleep.”

Alex groaned again, hauling himself out of the bed that Thomas dropped him on. “Who the fuck even says ‘for two’? And how the fuck did I get from the car to here?”

While Alex was going through his bag, Thomas responded. “Obviously, I carried you, dipshit. You didn’t just fly.”

Alex shot a glare over his shoulder while jabbing one of his fingers in his eye to remove one of his contacts. “Why didn’t you wake me up? I could have walked.”

“You’re about the same weight as my younger sister was when she was seven.” Thomas rolled his eyes. “It wasn’t a big deal. Besides, it wasn’t the first time I carried you.”

Alex sighed overdramatically, moving onto the second contact and then putting on his glasses. It was late and he was far too tired to argue properly. “Is there anything else Laf told you to make me do?”

“Does it not bother you that I’ve carried you before?” Thomas asked, taking out his contacts as well. “Or that we have to share a bed? I could just sleep on the couch.”

Alex took his response as a no to his question and he got back into the bed. Another wave of fatigue waved over him and his eyes were seemingly harder to keep open.

“Sleep wherever you want,” Alex mumbled, turning onto his side and putting his glasses on the nightstand. “You could sleep on fucking top of me for all I care.”

Thomas rolled his eyes. Tired Alexander was actually rather easy to get along with if you don’t mind his cursing every other word. “And what if I took you up on that?”

Alex looked over his shoulder, eyes nearly closed. “Put up or shut up, bitch.”

Thomas took off his shirt and joined Hamilton in the bed. He ran through his options in his mind, before deciding that he should probably stay as far from Hamilton in the bed as he could. He didn’t need Hamilton waking up in the morning, pissed at him for invading his personal space.

All of that went out the window when Thomas was the first of them to wake up in the morning, with Alexander wrapped around him like a Caribbean koala. Or at least, he thought he was the first one awake.

Thomas didn’t know what to do. He didn’t want to wake Alexander up; not when he knew that the man rarely gets any sleep. However, he didn’t want his head ripped off by Alexander waking up and seeing that Thomas didn’t push him off. He also didn’t want to face the embarrassment of Alexander possibly finding out that Thomas enjoyed having Alexander wrapped around him.

His pride outweighed anything else, but as soon as he tried to move one of Alex’s arms, they both tightened around him.

“Go back to sleep,” Alex mumbled into Thomas’ chest. “It’s ass o’clock in the morning and wherever the fuck James is won't open until ten.”

“You aren’t going to be happy with the position you’re in, darlin’.” The term of endearment slipped from Thomas’ mouth. Ice cold panic swept over him almost immediately after realizing what he said.

Alex looked up at him, his eyes blinking lazily. “Your accent is a lot stronger in the morning.”

“As is yours.” He didn’t dare say anything else upon the horror that he might let something else slip.

“I don’t have an accent,” Alex mumbled before tucking his head back into Thomas’ chest. “I’ll move if you want me to, but if not, I’d like to get some more of the sleep I skipped out on last week back.”

Thomas cautiously moved his arms around to embrace Alex lightly, causing the smaller man to hum happily into his chest. It didn’t take long for Alex to fall back to sleep, whereas it seemed to be the complete opposite for Thomas, who found himself still awake after nearly half an hour passed.

He managed to fish his phone out of his pocket without waking Alex, grimacing slightly upon finding that he only had twenty-five percent left. He opened his messaging app and typed out a quick text.

 **To: Faux Royauté:** i have a problem  
**Faux Royauté:** I will end you if you hurt Alexander in any way.  
**To: Faux Royauté:** not a problem like that. actually, he’s wrapped around me sleeping.  
**Faux Royauté:** One, I don’t see the problem. Two, pics or it didn’t happen.  
**To: Faux Royauté:** one, i’ve got it bad. two, i’m not taking pictures of alexander while he’s sleeping  
**Faux Royauté:** Well then it didn’t happen, so I don’t see a problem here.  
**Faux Royauté:** Also, play with his hair. He likes that.  
**Faux Royauté:** He also likes being kissed, but both of you have sticks too far up your asses to admit jack fuck to each other.  
**To: Faux Royauté:** the phrase you’re looking for is jack shit

Thomas set his phone down behind him and carefully wrapped his hand in Alex’s hair. He messed around with it for a bit, causing Alex to try and get even closer to Thomas. He would never openly admit it, but he was wide awake and was enjoying Thomas’ warmth very much. He knew there was no denying his feelings anymore, but there was also no point in saying them out loud when he would just get shot down.

Alex fluttered his eyes open, going through the motions of ‘waking up.’ He looked up at Thomas through his lashes, lazily smiling. “Didn’t know you were one for hair.”

“Shut up, Hamilton,” Thomas grumbled, retracting his hand.

“Alex.” He corrected, pushing himself away from Thomas and grabbing his glasses off of the nightstand. The frames were large and took up half of his face, something that made Thomas’ heart yearn for him. “Or darlin’, as you so kindly said this morning. Didn’t know you felt that way.”

His voice was full of jest, but Thomas’ was the complete opposite as he replied, “There’s a lot of things you don’t know about, _Alex_.”

Alex froze. _Could he mean- no, he couldn’t. You know he wouldn’t ever feel the same, Alexander, get your head out of your ass. He’s simply saying that it’s true, there’s a lot of things you don’t know about him. But still, he never corrected you. Maybe he meant to call you dar- no, no, no. He didn’t mean to, it must’ve slipped. It had to have just slipped._

“So where is your brother being held, then?” Thomas’ voice brought Alex out of his thoughts. The bed dipped on Thomas’ side as he got up and then returned to its original position.

Alex sat up and grabbed his phone, adjusting his glasses on his face as they slid down.

 **Le Meilleur:** it’d be a great time to tell thomas you’re madly in love with him, seeing as the two of you are alone, mon cher  
**Le Meilleur:** also, melodie thinks that the douchebag is being held in a holding cell at the police depart.  
**Le Meilleur:** tell him to go fuck himself for me  
**Le Meilleur:** she also doesn’t think the bail will be set that high if there even is one  
**Le Meilleur:** she wants to see you while you’re there  
**To: Le Meilleur:** I’m not madly in love with Thomas. I’m not telling my brother to go fuck himself. Tell Melodie that I’ll try my best.  
**Le Meilleur:** you say you’re not madly in love, but there is definitely some love there. margarita and i wish you the best with the fuck twat.  
**To: Le Meilleur:** Casse-toi.

Alex set his phone down. “Laf says that James’ wife thinks he’s just being held in a holding cell.”

“Then this should be easy, right?” Thomas asked, pulling on a shirt and a new pair of jeans.

“Getting him out, yes.” Alex reached down for his own bag, pulling out the clothes he grabbed. “Anything further than that, I sure hope so.”

Within the next thirty minutes, the two of them were in Thomas’ car. Their getting ready had passed with minor arguments, much to the surprise of Alexander. He had expected Thomas to take hours to get ready, but out of the two of them, Alex was the one who took longer, and that was simply because he was being stubborn about changing in the same room as Thomas. In the end, Thomas gave up and stood in the bathroom while Alex changed.

“I’m sorry, in advance, for my brother.” Alex sincerely spoke. “He’s an asshole, and I don’t think that has changed since I saw him last.”

Thomas gripped the wheel tightly, fighting the urge to reach over and grab Alex’s hand. It was a miracle that he had allowed it last night, there was no way he’d allow it again. _He doesn’t have any feelings other than tolerance for you, Thomas._

“You don’t need to apologize for him,” Thomas replied, trying to keep his voice void of any emotions.

“I do.” Alex insisted, bouncing his leg and adjusting his glasses. That was another thing that had happened while he was getting ready; he dropped one of his contacts down the sink. “He’s just a flat-out douchebag. He might insult you, so in advance, I’m sorry. Turn here.”

Thomas snorted and took the turn. “Since when do you care if someone insults me?”

“It’s different between you and me.” Alex peered out his window for the police station. “I insult you because that’s how you and I work. If we don’t insult each other then we lash out on others. But when other people insult you it pisses me off because that’s my thing. The police station should be up on your right, the next turn.”

“It pisses you off when others insult me?” Thomas incredulously asked, not buying it for even a second.

“You’re going to miss the turn if you aren’t paying attention.” Alex ignored the question and checked his phone. There were no new messages of importance, the only missed one from a college friend that he could answer whenever, so he turned off his phone and pocketed it. “Remind me to answer Pip’s text later.”

“Pip?” Thomas inquired, just barely making the turn before the light switched to red. He pulled into the police station parking lot and parked as well as he could; he didn’t necessarily want to park like shit in a place where they could probably find grounds to give him a ticket.

“Old college friend.” Alex unbuckled and took a deep breath.

 _You’re Alexander Hamilton, man._ His subconscious spoke louder than his doubtful thoughts. _You can tell James that this is the last time you’ll help him with his shit, you can keep yourself in check for the small amount of time you’re here. It’s about damn time you start acting your age and stand up to your brother. Stop being afraid of him. Be a Hamilton with pride._

“Do you want to come in?” Alex asked, raising an eyebrow. His voice was much stronger than he felt. “It normally doesn’t take too long, especially when it’s just a holding cell.”

Thomas was already unbuckling before Alex got the full sentence out of his mouth. “I’m coming with.”

Thomas didn’t have anything against police stations. That being said, however, he didn’t enjoy being in them. They gave him an uneasy feeling, a feeling that seemed to only get worse when the lady at the front desk told him to wait alone in the waiting room, while Alex went to get his brother. Luckily, the whole process didn’t take a long time, Thomas having enough time to send a text to his sister saying _‘can I add my boyfriend to the chat for us and our siblings so he’s in the know about everything’,_ but that was about it.

Alex rejoined him with a man who could be Alex’s identical twin if it weren’t for his height being around the same as Thomas’. He wore a cocky smirk on his face, whereas Alex’s face held an exasperated look, seemingly already done with being around James.

“Are we ready?” Thomas asked, standing up upon seeing the two of them.

Alex exhaled sharply, feeling his brother flick him in the back of the head for the third time. “As far as I know.”

Within five minutes, the three of them were in Thomas’ car, engulfed in an awkward silence, one that was broken by James.

“So I’m guessing you two are fucking?” He deadpanned, leaning up between the two front seats.

Alex’s face turned into a deep red, whereas Thomas took the question with stride.

“As far as I’m aware, Alexander has no interest in fucking me.” He mused, smoothly making the turn that the GPS instructed. James had given him his address, seeing as Alex had no earthly idea where his brother’s family was living.

Alex’s face managed to get even redder, much to his brother’s delight.

“He’s being prudish, then?” James laughed loudly at Alex, who looked like he wanted nothing more than to disappear. “You were ever so whorish before that one boyfriend of yours, Jamie was it? No, I think he had the same name as me. But after him, you became quite the prude.”

“Shut up.” Alex tensed up the moment James had begun talking about his ex, Thomas could see that much from just his peripheral vision. He couldn’t even begin to imagine what emotions were on his face.

“No thanks, baby bro.” James leaned back and crossed his arms. “It was after that boyfriend of yours that you became an alcoholic, I believe. You were ever so unpredictable after him. James did keep a pretty tight leash around you, didn’t he?”

“Shut the fuck up,” Alex spoke louder, turning to face his brother. Thomas tried to place his hand on Alex’s arm in a soothing manner, only to get it batted away. “Don’t fucking bring him up.”

“But I already have, so where’s the fun in that?” James laughed gleefully. “Ah, Reynolds really was the delight to have around. He did always know how to keep you in place. Knew how to shut you up, keep you from talking so much. But he was always good at keeping the bruises where no one could see.”

“Shut up!” Alex was near yelling, his voice cracking slightly at the last syllable.

“Alexander made his way three and a half hours just to help your sorry ass.” Thomas butted in. “I’d shut up if I were you because he had no reason to do this.”

Thomas hated seeing Alex as he was. His face was red and tears were brimming in his eyes, out of anger, frustration, or sadness, Thomas didn’t know. But what Thomas did know was that he hated seeing Alex cry, especially from someone being as much of a douche as his brother was. All of Alex’s friends hating him was making a whole lot of sense.

“I called Alex because I know that he’s got no one that’d be missing him.” James snorted, rolling his eyes. “Besides, my house is coming up on your left.”

A tension filled silence now filled the car, but it lasted only the thirty seconds it took to arrive at James’ house. He got out of Thomas’ car, and sadly, so did Alex.

Thomas watched as Alex followed James up the front porch steps. He watched as Alex yelled at him, only catching snippets of words through the glass. He watched James argue back, just as loud, but instead of an angry expression, he wore a smug one. He watched as Alex tried to walk away from him. He watched as James pulled him back and slapped him across the face. He watched Alex push him away and flip him off as he walked back to Thomas’ car. The Hamiltons were something else, that was definitely for sure.

Thomas backed out of the driveway as soon as Alex was buckled safely in the car. Alex’s cheek was burning, but it was nothing compared to the anger he was feeling for James. He took out his phone and turned it on, intent on texting Lafayette and then seeing what Pip had to say, as she always calmed him down.

 **To: Le Meilleur:** Didn’t get the chance to see Melodie or the kids. He brought up Jamie, Gil.

 **Pip (Elizabeth J):** yo yo yo hamslice. i’m gonna be in dc on monday and tuesday, and you better be at libertea or so help me,,,,,  
**To: Pip (Elizabeth J):** I’ll see what I can do, Pip  
**Pip (Elizabeth J):** nonnegotiable, sorry not sorry, you’d best be there, hammie

Thomas clearing his throat brought him out of his thoughts. “Uh, so, do you maybe want to talk-”

“About what just happened?” Alex ran a hand through his hair, yanking the tangle he ran into out. “I think I’d rather french kiss Adams than talk about what just happened.”


	12. back to the future

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i upped the rating, just in case  
> tw: there are descriptions of violence/abuse in this chapter, i am sorry ahead of time

_Alexander sat down at the table and promptly downed his water bottle._

_“Thirsty much?” Mark raised his eyebrows at his boyfriend, smiling softly._

_Alex flipped him off, his mouthful of water making him incapable of responding properly._

_“I’d like to see you get up there and rant like Alex does.” Tyler elbowed Mark slightly in jest._

_“Yeah, Mark.” Alex finished his water and put the bottle back into his backpack. “It’s not exactly easy to talk for ten minutes straight.”_

_“You make it look easy, babe.” Tyler grabbed Alex’s hand from across the table. “And I’m sure it’s much easier when you’re as rage fueled as you are.”_

_“He’s right ‘bout all of his points, though.” Mark mused, laying his head on Tyler’s shoulder. “John Adams_ is _a prick and the bank system needs some serious work.”_

_“He’s always right about his points,” Tyler smiled at Alex. “You’re definitely going to be a politician some day, Alex.”_

_“I’m going to school for law, not political shit.” Alex broke off a corner of Mark’s brownie and ate it._

_“Well I’m going to school for English, but I’m working in a café.” Mark stood up and pushed his chair in. “Speaking of, I need to get back to work. I’m technically only allowed to sit with you guys to watch Alex’s performance.”_

_“It’s not so much of a performance as it is just me rambling,” Alex called after Mark, who was now walking towards the front counter._

_“It’s a performance.” Tyler stuck his tongue out at Alex. “You gotta own up to that at some point.”_

_“It’s not-” Alex began, only to get cut off by someone tapping on his shoulder. He turned around to see a girl, around his age, standing with a smirk on her face._

_“I’m sorry, I seem to have lost my number, can I have yours?” She asked, mischief dancing in her eyes._

_Alex heard Tyler laughing, but he didn’t look away from the girl. “That was honestly terrible.”_

_“Oh, let me try again then, I’ve got this.” She leaned on the back of Alex’s chair and looked up at his through her lashes. “I’ve lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you tonight, instead?”_

_Tyler’s laughter got louder, and this time, Alex laughed as well. She stuck out her hand, not embarrassed in the slightest that the two of them were laughing at her attempts at flirting. “Elizabeth Jefferson. Can I buy you a drink?”_

_Alex still had a grin on his face as he shook her hand. “Alexander Hamilton. And, that would be nice.”_

_“He is in a relationship, just so you know,” Tyler spoke up, sobering up fairly quickly._

_“Oh, I noticed!” Elizabeth grinned. “It’s just, I had to offer a drink to the man who hates John Adams as much as I do.”_

_The three of them sat at the table, getting to know each other over steaming cups of coffee (or tea, in Elizabeth’s case). Elizabeth and Alex bonded over schooling (they would both be attending their first semester at Columbia in the fall) and Elizabeth and Tyler bonded over crappy pickup lines._

_“Okay, what about this one.” Elizabeth cleared her throat. “On a scale from tyranny to democracy, how free are you tonight?”_

_“No, I prefer straight forward ones.” Tyler shook his head, an easy smile on his face. “For instance, baby, you’re so hot that you make the Equator look like the North Pole.”_

_“You both are awful.” Alex shook his head._

_He turned around, getting the feeling that someone was watching him. Someone was, in fact, watching him, they were actually making their way towards him._

_“Excuse me, sir?” The man asked, hurrying up once he noticed that Alex saw him. “Were you the man who was talking about our banking system?”_

_Elizabeth and Tyler shot each other confused looks as Alex answered, “I’m barely a man, but yes, that was me.”_

_A cocky smile bloomed on his face. “Well, I’m a trust fund, baby, you can trust me.”_

_“Oh my God.” Alex let his face fall into his hands, his cheeks blossoming into a light pink. Tyler and Elizabeth laughed behind him, both appreciating the pickup line._

_“The name’s Reynolds. James Reynolds.” He held out a piece of paper with numbers written on it. “Call me sometime.”_

_He walked away without another word, while Alex sat there shaking his head. “Why am I always the one to get hit on?”_

_-_

_“Elizabeth!”_

_“Alex!”_

_The two ran towards each other upon seeing one another, meeting halfway in a hug. They hadn’t seen each other since they had met in the Libertea Café, but they had exchanged phone numbers and would be sharing an apartment off-campus._

_“I missed you!” Elizabeth’s voice was higher than usual, most likely because she was almost buzzing with excitement._

_“I missed you more, Pipsqueak!” Alex hugged her as tight as he could, scared that if he were to let go she would disappear. He knew that that was irrational, but it didn’t stop his fears either way._

_“I’m the same height as you, asswipe.” She hit his arm playfully and separated from him, just barely catching the look of panic in his eyes. “How are Mark and Tyler?”_

_Alex sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. “We, uh, broke up. Like two months ago.”_

_“And you didn’t tell me?” She huffed at him and they began walking towards their apartment. “What the hell?”_

_“Sorry, Pipsqueak.” He shrugged. “That’s a mouthful, so I’m just going to shorten it to Pip. Anyways, it wasn’t that big of a deal, we’re still good friends and what not. Besides, I’m talking to this other guy, actually.”_

_“Oh?” She raised an eyebrow and dug out the apartment key as they got to it. “And who might this person be?”_

_“Well, you remember James from the café?”_

_-_

_Elizabeth looked up from the book she was reading on their sofa, one delicate eyebrow raised as a smile played on her lips. “Where are you off to, Alex? It’s seven already and it’s freezing outside. Plus, you have finals tomorrow.”_

_The tips of Alex’s ears turned red. He stopped dead in his tracks and slowly turned around to face Elizabeth, who looked like she was about to laugh._

_“The third date in a week and a half, then?” She rolled her eyes and then made a shooing motion with her book. “Remember that you_ do _have finals tomorrow. And also, before things get too serious, I want to meet this kid.”_

_“Yeah, yeah. Love you Pip!” Alex called out as he made a dash for the door._

_-_

_Alex closed the door and immediately pressed his back to the door. On his face was a huge grin and he ran his hands through his hair, not exactly believing that that had just happened._

_“The date went well, then?” Elizabeth was still in her position on the couch with her book, the only difference being the glass of water next to her._

_“You have no idea!” Alex ran up to her, a spark in his eyes that she hadn’t seen before. “He took me ice skating, and then he kissed me! It was so wonderful, Pip! And you know how I was planning on staying here for the holidays? Well, he wants to take me upstate to meet his family. He officially asked me to be his boyfriend, too. I have a boyfriend!”_

_Elizabeth felt happy for her friend, but at the same time, she was a bit wary. “I still haven’t met him. And don’t you think you two are taking things a little fast? I mean, you’ve only been on three dates now, and he wants you to meet his parents.”_

_“I don’t care!” Alex truly felt the happiest he had ever been. He was finally starting to see that coming to the States wasn’t a mistake at all. “Oh, Elizabeth, I think I may be in love.”_

_“Whatever, hot shot.” She snorted and went back to her book, leaving Alex to go do whatever it is that Alex does._

_-_

_“So, Jamie, this is my roommate Elizabeth.” Alex introduced. “Pip, this is my boyfriend James.”_

_Elizabeth cautiously shook his hand, eyes unmoving from his._

_“It’s nice to meet you, Elizabeth.” James flashed her what she was sure he thought was a ‘charming’ smile, but she didn’t buy any of it. She didn’t say anything in response, instead, she just made a small noise of agreement._

_“Well, I’m sorry, but I’ve got to dash or I’m going to be late for work.” Alex planted a kiss on James’ cheek and then one on Elizabeth’s, causing James’ smile to falter, but not for long. “You two get to know each other, I really want the two most important people to me to get along.”_

_“See you tonight, Andy?” James asked, turning away from Elizabeth to look at his boyfriend._

_“Of course! I’ll go ahead and meet you there. Sound good?” Alex was grabbing his jacket and keys off of the coat rack as he spoke._

_“I can just pick you up from work, it won’t be much of a hassle.” He kept his voice friendly enough, but Elizabeth could hear tones underlying his voice that meant that this is what Alex would be doing, no questions further._

_“Alrighty then!” Alex cheerfully spoke, not seeing anything wrong with the request. If anything, it was better; it would cut down on pollution in the air, even if it was just a little bit. Alex left the apartment after bidding the other two another goodbye, leaving the two alone._

_Elizabeth slowly looked James up and down, looking carefully at every place on his body. His pants and shirt were too tight to conceal anything, so she was at least certain that he didn’t have any weapons on him. She wasn’t too sure about his jacket, but that was on the coatrack and she could easily take him out if need be before he could reach the rack. Well, maybe not easily. But she had faith in herself._

_“What are you doing?” James asked, wary of the woman standing in front of him. Sure, she was only a freshman in college and was still technically 19, technically still a teenager, but she resembled a woman more than many women he had met in his life._

_“Looking at you.” Elizabeth narrowed her eyes. “Or, in gang terms, seeing as you’d recognize those better, looking for weak spots in an enemy.”_

_A feeling of panic washed over James, but he didn’t let it show. How would she possibly know anything? He was completely positive that she was just spitballing, trying to do her job of intimidating the boyfriend of her best friend. “Why do you say that I’d recognize gang terms?”_

_Elizabeth rolled her eyes. “Cut the shit, Reynolds. Don’t play dumb when we both know that you’re a part of one of the biggest gangs in New York City.”_

_“I don’t know why you’re accusing me of that.” Okay, she might know something. But it couldn’t be too serious, right? Not serious enough that she’d make him break up with Alexander, because although he knew he was no good for Alexander, he loved him dearly._

_“Let’s sit.” Elizabeth’s tone was icy and sharp, leaving no room for discussion. She gestured to the sofa and chairs, not sitting down until he did, making sure not to leave her back exposed to him. “Reynolds, I come from very old money in the South. My father? A US Congressman and ex-governor of Virginia. I have access to files that most police don’t, all with just a little pout and whine in my voice. As soon as Alexander began talking about you, I got access to all of the files on you, and let me tell you what, I did not like what I saw.”_

_“Okay, Elizabeth, let me just-” He tried to talk, only for her to hold up a hand and interrupt him._

_“I am still speaking, Reynolds.” Her glare towards him intensified. “I’m not going to tell Alexander. Or at least, not yet. That’s up to you to do. However, if you ever bring Alexander into any of your gang shit, I will personally end you.”_

_-_

**_Pip (Elizabeth J):_ ** _i’ll be back in like a week, don’t burn the house down_ _  
_ **_Pip (Elizabeth J):_ ** _or have sex on any of the appliances_

_Alex laughed and leaned into James, who immediately put his arm around him. “Pip says to not have sex on any of the appliances, Jamie.”_

_“Why would we when a bed is much more comfortable?” James looked down at his boyfriend and felt his heart swell. He didn’t deserve Alex whatsoever, but he was grateful that he had him. “Imagine accidentally turning on the oven and burning your ass.”_

_“Fuck, that would hurt.” Alex put his head over James’ heart, the steady beat soothing to him._

_“Language.” James warned, his tone light but still a warning one._

_“Yes, mom.” Alex teased with a grin on his face. “Sorry, mom.”_

_“Oh, shut it, you.”_

_-_

_“It’s not my fault that the guy was flirting with me!” Alex exclaimed loudly, not quite yelling. He didn’t understand why James couldn’t just leave it alone._

_“But you were flirting back!” James, however, was yelling, much to Alex’s chagrin. “You could’ve just told him to leave you alone, you’re taken! It’s not even like we haven’t been dating that long, Alexander! We’ve been dating for a year, and you still act like a whore!”_

_“Don’t fucking call me a whore!” Alex’s temper was slowly bubbling to the top. “I wasn’t fucking flirting back! Telling him my name and taking the number from him isn’t flirting!”_

_“Watch your language, Alexander.” James warned. “Don’t fucking test me right now. Hell, I bet you still have the number with you.”_

_“No, I threw it away, because I’m fucking taken!” Alex was yelling back at James now, his arms gesturing wildly. “And you have no place to correct my fucking language when you’re cursing just as bad!”_

_“I said to watch your language, Alexander.” James took a step towards Alex, not intent on doing anything more than just intimidating him._

_“You don’t own me!” Alex pushed James away from him. “Don’t fucking tell me-”_

_Before Alex could say another word, James reached out and slapped him across the face, hard enough to make his head snap to the right._

_Both of them stared at each other for a moment in silence, Alex cradling his cheek and James looking at him with wide eyes. Neither of them could really believe that James had just slapped Alex, but Alex’s cheek told a different story. Alex was the first to snap out of the stupor, moving towards the door before James could say another word._

_“I need to go.”_

_-_

_“When was the last time you talked to that Gilbert kid?” Elizabeth asked, not looking up from her magazine._

_“I texted him a bit yesterday. It’s refreshing to talk to someone else whose native language is French.” Alex was busy with a pot of mac and cheese in the kitchenette. “We should have him over some time, he’s a sweet guy. I think you’d get along with him if you know what I mean.”_

_“I have absolutely no idea what you mean, Alex.” She mused, turning a page leisurely._

_“You two would be a cute couple is what I mean, Pip.” He stirred the pot, cursing softly when a few noodles escaped the pot._

_"Yes, well I think that you would make a cute couple with that Madison kid." Elizabeth responded, circling a few sentences on the page._

_"I happen to be in a perfectly fine relationship right now."_

_A knock on the door prevented Elizabeth from responding, but it didn’t stop her from asking Alex to grab the door._

_“You’re literally closer and not in the middle of cooking.” Alex responded. “You can get the door.”_

_The knocking got more persistent, so Elizabeth sighed loudly but went to get it nonetheless. She opened it and immediately scoffed, any trace of a good mood gone at the sight of his face. Never in the year and a half of him and Alex dating had she warmed up to him, and she wasn’t going to start now._

_“Elizabeth.” He greeted with a curt nod._

_“What do you want Reynolds?” She narrowed her eyes and took in his form. He didn’t look to have any weapons on him, but he could easily be hiding a knife of some sort in the bouquet of flowers he was holding._

_“Is Alex here?” He asked, ignoring his automatic reaction to run every time he sees Elizabeth._

_“Yes.” She shut the door in his face and went back to the couch to read._

_“Who was at the door?” Alex called from the kitchenette._

_“Your boyfriend with a stupid question.”_

_The knocking began again and Alex took a deep breath, wiping his hands on a dish towel as he walked past it. He always got nervous when he saw James, but anyone else in his position with James would, too. He never knew what kind of mood James would be in when he saw him, but he loved his boyfriend dearly and so he put up with whatever came to him._

_“Hi, Jamie.” Alex greeted, leaning against the doorframe._

_“Hi, Andy.” James’ eyes were flitting everywhere, but Alex paid no mind to it. James held out his hand with the flowers in them. “I got these for you.”_

_“Thank you, sweetheart.” Alex stood up on his tiptoes to press a kiss to his cheek as he took the flowers. “Do you need something?”_

_Alex placed the flowers in an empty vase they had on the in-table; the last flowers in it having just been thrown out that morning._

_“Could we talk in private, actually?” James asked, seeing Elizabeth perched on the couch when Alex moved out of the way._

_“Anything you have to say to Alex can be said in front of me.” Elizabeth mused, not looking up as she spoke._

_“Uh, yeah.” Alex ignored Elizabeth’s comment and walked out into the hall with James, closing the apartment door behind him. “What do you need, Jamie?”_

_“I was wondering if you’d like to go out tonight?” James inquired, taking one of Alex’s hands in both of his._

_“James, I just made dinner for Elizabeth and I. Not to mention, I have work early tomorrow. Tonight just isn’t a good night.” Alex tried to look anywhere but James’ face, knowing that his response would have definitely put an angry expression on his face._

_However, James took one of his hands off of Alex’s and moved it to his chin, forcing Alex to look at him. “Let me rephrase that, Alexander. We’re going out tonight.”_

_-_

_“Alex, can I ask you a question?” Elizabeth carefully chose her words as to not make Alex too anxious. She knew his anxiety levels seemed to be higher than ever lately, but she’d be anxious too if she were in his position. What with the wedding planning and moving out of their apartment into a house with James. And now, if her predictions were correct, this…_

_“Sure thing, Pip.” She had long outgrown him, now standing at 5’9” compared to his 5’6”, but he still refused to call her anything but Pip._

_“Where did the bruise on your cheek come from?” He tensed up as she asked, that action alone basically confirming her suspicions._

_“I told you that I fell down the stairs, being clumsy me.” He didn’t turn around to look at her, but if he did, then she would have surely seen the panicked look on his face. James had told him that no one could find out. Oh, James was going to be so pissed._

_“Alexander, you and I both know that that’s bullshit.” She hopped off of where she was perched on top of Alex’s dresser and walked up to him, turning him around to face her. “Alex, sweetheart, how long has James been hitting you?”_

_Almost as if on cue, Alex broke down into tears, and all Elizabeth could really do was hold Alex as he cried. Well, that and plan James’ death._

_“You can’t let him know you know, Elizabeth.” He suddenly looked up at her, his red-rimmed eyes huge. “Please, Elizabeth. I don’t know what he’ll do to me if he knows that you found out.”_

_Elizabeth held in her urge to sigh, knowing that it wouldn’t help the situation any, just make Alex feel worse. James’ death would have to come another day. “I won’t let him know, Alex. But this isn’t okay.”_

_-_

_Alex was sobbing into Elizabeth’s shirt as he clung on to his best friend. The latest bruise was still fresh on his skin, a reminder that James had seen him just that morning. How could this have happened?_

_Elizabeth knew it had to have been gang related, there was no one else she could think of that would want to kill him. Besides, her of course, but she hadn’t gone out and actually killed him._

_“He can’t be gone, Pip!” Alex sobbed. “He just-”_

Alex’s eyes opened with a start. His face was streaked with tears and he could feel the panic throughout his body. His body. His body. His body was being shaken. That was- that was a start. Normally when he had nightmares, none of his senses came back for at least a few minutes.

His eyes. He couldn’t see what was around him. He could feel, he could feel his breathing. Or, what breathing he was doing. His breathing would falter for a few moments before coming back in sharp pants. He could hear faintly, but what he heard was far away. He couldn’t taste anything, but when he could, he knew that he’d be able to taste the familiar copper taste of blood from biting down on his tongue and cheeks too hard. He couldn’t smell either, but his sense of smell didn’t really matter to him at the moment.

Slowly, things started coming back. His eyes. His eyesight was blurry, he couldn’t see anything around him. However, that was because he needed glasses to see, glasses that he didn’t have with him.

His ears. His hearing. What he thought was distant wasn’t, in fact, distant, but right next to him. It wasn’t even muttering, no, it was a normal talking voice.

His body. He wasn’t being shaken. Or at least, he wasn’t being shaken like he thought. Instead, it was gentle rocking, like how a parent would comfort their child, or how a lover would comfort their significant other.

“Darlin’, it was a nightmare.” A smooth southern accent was right next to his ear. Who was that? Who was he? Where was he? What was going on? “You’re safe here, you’re with someone who loves you. You’re alright, sweetheart. Oh, please be alright, Alex.”

Who was that? He still had no idea. His thoughts and mind processes were slowly coming back. Alex? Was he Alex? Oh yes, he was Alex. Alexander Hamilton. And he had just had a nightmare. A nightmare that had taken its form in memories. Last he knew, he was still in Princeton with- Jefferson. He was with Jefferson. Or, rather, Thomas. His enemy- no, his friend- no, the man he found himself having feelings with. Feelings that he used to have for James.

The thought of James made Alex whimper and try to curl up into a ball. Thomas didn’t allow that, and instead made sure Alex’s head was safely on his chest, where he ran his hands through Alex’s hair.

“You’re okay, darlin’.” He had been woken up by Alex thrashing about and sobbing, and he’d be damned if he was going back to sleep without Alex being okay. “Sugar, you’re with me, you’re alright, I promise. It was a nightmare, it can’t hurt you, honey.”

A new wave of tears washed over Alex, who maneuvered himself until his arms were wrapped around Thomas. Thomas still rocked him back and forth, allowing the smaller man to cry into his chest.

“Shh, I’ve got you, Alex.” He wasn’t used to someone crying on him, he was pretty much just following the little knowledge he retained from his mother checking on his twin while they were growing up and she had nightmares. “Whatever it was, it can’t hurt you, sweet pea, you’re here with me and I’ll protect you.”

Thomas held Alex like that until he fell back to sleep. Well, no. He held Alex like that even after he had fallen asleep, scared that Alex would have another nightmare. He couldn’t find it in himself to fall back to sleep, but at one point, he did remember to take out his phone to update Lafayette.

 **To: Faux Royauté:** disregard the last message, i think i managed to calm him down from it, or at least i calmed him enough to the point that he fell back to sleep. gnight, gilbert. we’ll see you tomorrow.


	13. a lovely mess

When Monday morning rolled around, two men found themselves in identical situations, and yet also in completely different situations.

Both of them sat at their desks, going through papers for the morning meeting. Neither of them wanted to go to the meeting. However, the meeting was one of the last things on their minds. They both knew that they could make up bullshit as they were talking, and the other attendees would never know. Except for maybe each other.

One of the men threw his papers to the side. He was angry, and yet, at the same time, he was upset and confused. Why had the other man kissed him? What was he playing at? He then left as soon as he could, causing the other to believe that it was nothing more than a mistake and the other man was disgusted in him. He was also scared, scared that the other man had remembered what he had said, scared that everything between them would be ruined now.

The other man focused too much on his thoughts, his hand going lax and the papers falling all around him. His anxiety was eating him alive and he needed answers. He deserved answers. He was scared that his counterpart was going to ridicule him; he shouldn’t have kissed him, and he shouldn’t have let his guard down long enough around him for what had happened to happen. But those things he had said, the way he had held him, those all could mean something. _They probably don’t_ , his subconscious reminded.

Both men collected their papers and left their offices quickly, already having wasted too much time hoping that the meeting would be canceled.

“‘Lex, you okay?” Eliza asked him on his way out, “You look a bit sick.”

“I’m fine, Betsy.” He flashed her a smile but she wasn’t buying it. “Just a little shaken up from the weekend.”

She pursed her lips and hummed a bit. “Whatever you say.”

As soon as Alex was out of sight, she took out her phone and typed two quick texts.

 **To: glibert lafayette:** something is wrong with alex. is his friend still coming tomorrow?  
**gilbert lafayette:** As far as I know, yes. She’ll be popping in tomorrow morning and taking him out for the day, he needs it. You can meddle, if you wish, though.

 **To: james madison:** is thomas acting odd today? alex is, and i was wondering if something happened during their trip.

Thomas left his office, almost immediately encountering James. James looked him up and down, taking in his disheveled appearance (he wasn’t really disheveled, he looked good to anyone who didn’t know him as well as James does), before wordlessly walking with him. Neither of them talked until the silence was broken by Thomas, who couldn’t take it anymore.

“IthinkI’minlovewithAlexander,” Thomas said in one breath, his words all running together.

“Hm?” James raised an eyebrow, feigning curiosity. He had heard Thomas just fine, but this was a moment he had been expecting for, well, since Thomas had first met Alexander. He was going to bask in its warm glow for as long as he could.

“Don’t make me say it again.” Thomas looked down, hiding his reddening cheeks with his hair.

“I didn’t understand what you said, though.” James tried to hide his smirk, just barely covering it when Thomas looked back up at him.

“James.” Thomas’ eyes were pleading as he looked up at him. “Please.”

James took out his phone, now feigning boredom, swiping away a text from Eliza. “Thomas, I can’t help you if I don’t know what you need help with.”

Thomas swallowed away his nervousness, stopping in the middle of the hallway. He turned to face James and placed his hands on his shoulders, mindful of the papers in his hands. He quietly spoke, as to make sure that no one passing heard him. “I am only going to say this once more, okay?”

James nodded and fought the urge to grin at his best friend. He knew Thomas was hopelessly in love with Alexander and he was more than a little bit excited that his friend finally realized it; now all he needed was for Alexander to realize the same. That, and he needed the twenty dollars Dolley owed him for Thomas admitting first.

“I think I’m in love with Alexander.” Thomas’ voice was still low, but just loud enough for James to hear.

James tried to hide his grin but failed on a large scale. He didn’t try any longer, a laugh bubbling up in his chest. Soon, he was nearly bent over in laughter, unable to stop himself.

“This is serious!” Thomas whined, turning away from James. “I knew you wouldn’t take it seriously.”

Thomas began to walk away, causing James to attempt at sobering up. He jogged to catch up with him, his laughter slowly dying off. “Thomas, hold up. I’m taking you seriously it’s just-”

“It’s just what, James?” Thomas asked, his grip tightening on his papers as he tried to keep his anger down. “You’re the only person I’ve told, I thought that I’d be able to come to you with my actual problems and I thought that you’d be the only person who would take me seriously about this.”

“That’s not it, you know that I always take you seriously.” James had to take two steps for every one stride of Thomas, but it didn’t bother him in the slightest. “It’s just that I’ve waited _so long_ for you to admit this to yourself, let alone me. I was starting to think I was wrong.”

“You what?” Thomas asked, slowing down a slight margin. “Actually, no, I don’t want to know.”

“So what’s the problem, then?” James inquired.

“I may have admitted it-”

“You do realize that the two of you literally just walked past the meeting room, right?”

The two of them whipped around, now facing a smug looking Charles Lee.

“No, we actually did not.” James snorted, finding the situation hilarious.

“And here I thought that you couldn’t get stupider.” Lee turned around and walked into the room, but not before Thomas responded.

“Yet, you’re the one who just said stupider.”

When Thomas and James were sat in their usual seats, James continued their earlier conversation.

“It’s not a problem that you admitted it, Thomas.” He whispered. “Do you want to try to pursue anything with him?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Thomas tried to hide behind the papers he was putting in order, but couldn’t hide away from James’ teasing tone.

“So that’s a yes, then.” He went back to his regular tone, although still at a whisper. “You’re friends with Lafayette, yes? Tell him that you have feelings for Alex, and get advice on what to do.”

Thomas went to respond but shut his mouth upon hearing the door open. Hamilton walked in, looking truly disheveled. He loosely held papers by his side, not caring if the papers ended up on the ground or in front of him as he sat in his chair. Thomas stared at him directly, whereas Alexander tried to look anywhere but at Thomas. He couldn’t face the humiliation.

“Sorry that I’m late,” Washington spoke as he entered the room soon after. “I have an important meeting very shortly, so let’s keep this as short as we can. Secretary Hamilton, do you have your debt plan ready?”

Alexander’s eyes widened, looking away from the papers in his hands, to Washington, and then flitting quickly over Thomas. “It’s not ready, yet. It’ll be ready after Thanksgiving.”

“Alright. Reminded, everyone needs to be out of here by two on Thursday; no work from next Friday to the Monday after Thanksgiving.” As Washington talked, Thomas tuned him out; he was already up to date on the current schedule and he didn’t need to listen to what he already knew, especially while trying to sort through his thoughts.

After the meeting, no one moved as quickly as Alexander did to exit the room. Washington barely had his final words out of his mouth before Alex was up out of his seat, beelining for the door. He heard someone calling his name behind him, but he didn’t wait up to see who it was.

When he got back to his office (he had ignored the look Eliza gave him, knowing she would want to talk if he lingered too long), he sat at his desk and pulled up his Google Drive. He pulled up a new document and tried to think of something to write, but came up with nothing. He couldn’t think of anything other than Thomas, and he hated that.

He took out his phone and drafted a text, deleting it several times before sending it.

 **To: jeffershithead:** Asshole.

He wasn’t expecting a quick response, but it was what he got. Much to his dismay, instead of getting work done, he found himself engaged in a conversation with the one person he wanted to avoid more than anything.

 **jeffershithead:** why am i an asshole?  
**To: jeffershithead:** You just are.  
**jeffershithead:** surely i deserve an explanation as to why  
**To: jeffershithead:** Surely I deserve proper grammar, but it doesn’t look like I’m getting that.  
**jeffershithead:** Touché.  
**To: jeffershithead:** So now you use proper grammar?  
**jeffershithead:** That’s what you wanted, isn’t it?  
**To: jeffershithead:** I want you to stop being such an asshole.  
**jeffershithead:** I can’t stop if I don’t know how I’m being an asshole.  
**To: jeffershithead:** Like that, right there. That’s you being an asshole.  
**jeffershithead:** How? Also, fair warning, my sister let me add you into our group chat so you know what’s going on with Thanksgiving. That is, assuming you’re still up for being my boyfriend?  
**To: jeffershithead:** I’m still up for being your boyfriend, don’t be such an asshole and assume that I’m not.  
**jeffershithead: *** Fake boyfriend, sorry, forgot to add that.  
**jeffershithead:** Wait, what?  
**To: jeffershithead:** FucK. That’s you being an asshole again!

Alex threw his phone as far from himself as he could, cringing slightly as it thudded against the wall. Of course, he just _had_ to do something like that, that fucking asshole. Of _course,_  he’d play Alexander like that, especially after the stunt Alexander pulled. Of course he’d fucking do something like that.

A tender knock sounded at his door. _Probably Eliza._

“Come in.” He called out, not wanting to get up from his desk. He still needed to write.

“Alex?” Eliza poked her head through the door. _Called it._ “James Madison wants to talk with you, are you busy?”

“Incredibly.” His voice dripped with sarcasm. “Tell him I can’t be bothered, I have far too much work. While you’re at it, can you also tell him to tell Jefferson to go fuck himself?”

“I’ll tell him you’re too busy, but not the message for Thomas!” She cheerfully replied. “Next time you throw something, by the way, aim for the wall that doesn’t connect right by my desk. Scared the crap out of me.”

“Will do.”

As Eliza closed his door, he turned back to his computer, intent on writing. He shook his mouse to revive his computer, typed in his password, and then set up the document how he likes it. He then typed the title ( _Reasons Why Thomas Jefferson is an Asshole_ ) and centered it. He began typing, having a perfectly laid out document pictured in his head.

He got lost in his writing, not noticing time passing around him. It was nearing five by the time Lafayette walked into Alex’s office, not bothering on knocking.

“Time to go, mon amour!” His voice was cheerful, as was the norm for Lafayette, unless he was thoroughly pissed.

“I’m not near done, though.” Alex didn’t look away from his laptop to respond, still furiously typing.

“You’re done for tonight!” He walked over to the wall next to Alex’s desk, pulling all of the plugs attached to the wall. “It’ll all be here for you in the morning. You need not to be tired when Pip gets to this town tomorrow!”

“Your English still confuses me at times, Gil.” Alex’s hands moved as if he still wanted to type, but reluctantly, he pulled himself away from his desk.

His work was, indeed, still there for him in the morning. He arrived Tuesday morning in a much better mood than he had left on Monday. He greeted Eliza with a large grin on his face, something Eliza had begun to miss. Lafayette watched them greet each other with a smile on his face as well, Alex’s good mood making him happy as well.

“Don’t get me wrong, I love that you’re in a good mood, but what’s got you so happy?” Eliza asked, returning the hug he gave her.

“Pip said she’ll be here around six tonight!” The light had returned to his eyes, causing happiness to bubble up in Eliza. “I’m so excited for you all to meet her!”

“I can’t wait to meet the lady who’s made the smile on your face a genuine one.” Eliza placed a kiss on his cheek. “Are you doing anything for the open mic night?”

“Of course I am.” Alex gave another hug before going to open his office door. “Now, I don’t exactly know if what I’m doing will be good for my career, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to do it.”

“Most things you do could end your career, Lex.” She rolled her eyes. “By the way, the morning meeting is fifteen minutes later today, due to Mr. President waking up late.”

“How do you always know these things?” He called from his office, where he started to plug in everything that Lafayette had unplugged. He also picked up his phone, having left it last night.

“It’s my job!” Eliza shouted back. Then, quieter, too Lafayette, she asked, “I thought that you said she’d be here this morning?”

“Oh, she will be.” Lafayette nodded. “She just wanted to surprise Alexander. She’ll be here during the morning meeting, so she’s going to come crash it. It’ll be a surprise for Alexander in more ways than one, though.”

“Why is that?” Eliza questioned. She saw the obvious reason; her crashing the meeting. She failed to see any other reasons, though.

“Oh, you’ll figure it out when you meet her.” His eyes were alight with mischief, but Eliza ignored it. There was no way her mood was going down after seeing Alexander in such a good one.

Inside his office, Alex was plugging in his phone. He decided that going through his messages would be the first order of business would be to check his unread messages, knowing that if he started writing, he wouldn’t pull himself out of it to go to the meeting.

 **jeffershithead:** How am I being an asshole by saying ‘Wait, what?’  
**jeffershithead:** If anything, you’re being an asshole by not responding to me  
**jeffershithead:** i’m sorry if i’ve made you upset in any form, alexander  
**jeffershithead:** good morning, i’m still sorry if i’ve upset you  
**To: jeffershithead:** Eliza wouldn’t deliver the message to James for me, but I wanted him to tell you to go fuck yourself. That still stands.  
**jeffershithead:** will you just accept my apology?  
**jeffershithead:** please?  
**To: jeffershithead:** Fine. I, Alexander Hamilton, formally accept Thomas Jeffershithead’s apology, although he is an asshole who uses my feelings against me.  
**To: jeffershithead:** However, I, Alexander Hamilton, would like it to formally be stated that Thomas Jeffershithead’s attempts at ruining my good mood have not worked.  
**jeffershithead:** i wasn’t trying to ruin your mood. and what feelings?  
**To: jeffershithead:** Sure, Jan.

 **Pip (Elizabeth J.):** are yoU READY TO GET YOUR LIBERTEA ON  
**To: Pip (Elizabeth J.):** HECK YES I AM SO READY  
**To: Pip (Elizabeth J.):** I MISS YOU SO MUCH,,,,, PIP  
**Pip (Elizabeth J.):** I’M TALLER THAN YOU  
**To: Pip (Elizabeth J.):** DOESN’T MEAN I’M GOING TO STOP CALLING YOU PIP

Alex felt a smile blooming on his face, just from texting her. He hadn’t seen her for nearly nine months, and that was the longest he had gone without seeing her since they had met. He missed her dearly and couldn’t wait to see her.

He checked the time and noticed he had around fifteen minutes until the meeting began. He collected his belongings, opting to leave his debt plan today. He was going to wait until after the Thanksgiving break because it was too close to a break now- they would veto anything that came up to them, just because it required less thinking.

He gave a little wave to Eliza as he passed her desk, seeing as she was busy on a phone call. She waved back, giving a grin between words. He walked to the meeting room, a slight skip to his walk.

“Morning, James!” Alex greeted, ignoring Thomas sitting next to him.

“Good morning, Alexander.” James smiled softly, noticing his friends’ good mood immediately. “What’s got you so happy? Not that I don't enjoy seeing you happy.”

“It’s just a beautiful, beautiful day, my dear Jemmy.” Alex grinned, checking his phone as it buzzed in his pocket several times.

 **[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] (Unknown Number):** WAIT IS THIS TOMMY’S BOYFRIEND  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] (Unknown Number):** HI TOMMY’S BOYFRIEND  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] (Unknown Number):** I’M SO EXCITE TO MEET YOUR BOYFRIEND TOMMY  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] jeffershithead:** guys stfu, you’re going to scare him off  
**To: [Group MMS- Jeffersiblings]:** You guys aren’t going to scare me off! I’m Alexander, it’s nice to meet you all!  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] (Unknown Number):** HE TALKS

 **jeffershithead:** i’m glad you’re in a good mood, alexander

Alexander didn’t respond, pocketing his phone. More people were beginning to trickle in, including, surprisingly, Lafayette.

“Is the seat next to you open, mon amour?” He asked, tilting his head.

“Go right ahead, Gil.” Alexander motioned, starting to bounce in his seat. He couldn’t wait for the meeting to be done because the day always seems to go faster after the meeting is out of the way. “It’s the seat you should be sitting in every day, considering you _are_ Press Secretary.”

Lafayette made a vague gesture with his hands as he sat down. “Ah, how you say, tomato, potato?”

“You mean tomato, tomato?” Thomas spoke from across the table.

“No, I don’t think that’s what I mean.” Lafayette shook his head. He watched the door carefully, having gotten confirmation from Elizabeth that she was in the building moments before he walked into the room.

“But-” Thomas tried to protest, only to get cut off by Washington entering the room.

“Secretary Lafayette, nice of you to join us for once.” Washington nodded at the man, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

“Mr. President, don’t worry, it won’t become an everyday thing.” Lafayette quipped back, not missing a beat. Alexander rolled his eyes at him and looked towards the clock again, willing it to go faster.

Alexander began to space off while Washington spoke. He gave appropriate responses when they were warranted, but all he really focused on was the slow moving clock. Eventually, Washington told them that they were dismissed, only for Thomas to speak up before Alex could dart out of the room.

“Does anyone else hear that?” He asked, causing everyone else to pause.

“Hear what?” Washington asked, narrowing his eyes.

“Just listen.” Thomas said, ears straining to pick up the noise that he thought he heard outside.

Lafayette wore a large grin as he realized what he heard. Outside of the room was a female voice shouting, causing a ruckus that only Elizabeth Jefferson knew how to.

A thud was heard at the meeting room door, followed by a shout of, “I am a good, law abiding citizen! I have every right to meet personally with our president, whether you like it or not! Let go of me, you heathen!”

The response was muffled, but all of the occupants of the room could assume that it wasn’t a good one, because another thud was heard, before Elizabeth responded with, “God, that’ll teach you not to fucking touch me.”

Alx sent a confused look towards Lafayette, who just grinned in response.

The meeting room door opened, and in the doorway stood Elizabeth. “You guys should really work on your security system. Were you aware that it sucks monkey balls?”

Thomas stared at his sister in horror. “What the hell are you doing here?”


	14. this is a crappy filler lmao

She flashed a charming smile that she had picked up from her brother at the security guard as he looked over the identification card she handed him.

“You really think that I’m going to believe this?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. “Exactly how stupid do you think I am?”

“Oh, it’s not that I believe you’re stupid, love.” She looked up at him through her lashes, holding her helmet on her hip. “Do you really think that the Secretary of Treasury would let his ID fall into the wrong hands? He left it at home this morning and I figured he’d be needing it. I also packed him a lunch, figured I’d be a good girlfriend.”

He narrowed his eyes and handed back the card. “What’s your name?”

“Elizabeth Jefferson, sir.” She pocketed the card. “Twin of Thomas Jefferson, might I add. If you want to call him down here and get him involved, be my guest, but Tommy is a little grouchy in the mornings; I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

He didn’t let his eyes leave her until he had her name typed into his system. She knew for a fact that it came back clean, with evidence saying that everything she had said thus far was the truth. She also knew that the search would come up with the bare minimum amount of information on her- her file was much above the security guards' pay grade.

“I’m going to have to search your motorcycle and frisk you for anything illegal.” He finally spoke, not seeing anything too utterly wrong with her.

“As to be expected of you, sir.” She kicked out her kickstand and let the bike lean onto it. She unmounted the bike and set her helmet down on it.

“Be careful walking around her,” She warned, “the exhaust pipe will burn straight through your clothes.”

“Thank you for the warning.” He nodded, checking the saddlebags and anywhere else she could be hiding things. The pat down didn’t last long, and she was soon sent on her way, after having tuned out the man’s droning on and on about rules she had to follow.

She found a parking spot rather easily, you’d think that more people would be in the parking lot. _Then again, it is the government,_ She reminded herself, _it’s surprising anyone is actually here the week before a holiday._

The rest of the security was nothing compared to the initial run in. Then again, she was carrying the ID of Alexander Hamilton; most people knew of his bad side and didn’t want to get on it. If this woman was close enough to him to have his ID badge, then she could definitely make it so that they were on his bad side.

 **To: gil bear <3: ** YA GIRL IS IN THE BUILDING  
**gil bear <3: ** We’re in the meeting, find Eliza Schuyler and she’ll give you directions.  
**To: gil bear <3: **OMW

Elizabeth tapped the shoulder of the nearest person she could find. “Hi, sorry to bother you, but do you know where I could find Eliza Schuyler?”

“It’s all good!” The person cheerfully responded. “Eliza’s desk is down that hallway and then to the left. I’m Friedrich if you need any more help!”

“Thank you!” She followed his directions and found herself standing in front of a woman playing games on her phone at a desk.

“Miss, are you Eliza Schuyler?” Elizabeth asked, silently wondering why Gil would send her to someone who seemed completely invested in their phone. Also, why the government would hire someone like that. _Actually, the government would hire practically anyone,_ she corrected.

“Oh!” Eliza looked up, surprised that someone had joined her. “I am so sorry! Yes! I’m Eliza Schuyler, may I help you? Again, so sorry!”

Elizabeth let a smile settle on her face, a fake one, but a smile no less. “My friend sent me to you, said that you’d be able to help me with directions to a meeting. His name is Gilbert Lafayette if that helps any.”

“Oh my god, are you Pip?” Eliza asked, her eyes widening, along with her smile. She stood up so fast that she nearly knocked over her office chair. She stepped out from behind her desk and offered her hand out to Elizabeth.“I have heard so much about you! I’m Elizabeth Schuyler, it’s a pleasure to meet you!”

Elizabeth had a million thoughts running through her head at once. This woman was all sorts of different things, and they had just been in each other's’ presence for less than two minutes.

_Focus on the task at hand. Analyze her later._

Elizabeth daintily shook Eliza’s hand, trying not to give too much away about herself in the little bit of time they had been together.

“Elizabeth Jefferson,” Elizabeth flashed the charming smile she had given the guard. “I prefer Lizzie or Beth, but Alexander and Gilbert have always taken to calling me Pip.”

“Thank you, for helping Alexander all the years that you two have known one another.” Eliza praised, retracting her hand.

“If it takes putting up with Alexander for us to meet, it will have been worth it.” Elizabeth drawled, taking note of how Eliza’s cheeks flushed lightly. She reminded herself that she had something to do, that this was not a time to charm Alex’s friends. “I do hate to cut this short, but I do have a meeting to get to.”

Eliza took a deep breath, trying to regain composure. It was odd that a woman could have her flustered in that little span of time, and she wasn’t enjoying the feeling of knowing that someone could make her that flustered. _Remember, Eliza,_ she reminded herself, _you have Maria, and a wonderful girlfriend she is._

“Maria sounds wonderful and all, however, I really need directions.” Elizabeth was humored by the other woman. It was a pleasing feeling, knowing that she hadn’t lost her touch of being a charmer.

Eliza’s eyes widened, embarrassed that she had said that out loud. “I am so sorry. Uh-”

“Don’t be sorry.” Elizabeth allowed a genuine grin to creep out onto her face. “I wasn’t really trying to flirt you up, anyways. My heart lies with dear Gilbert.”

“Oh, um,” Eliza cleared her throat, and tried to clear her mind along with it, “the meeting! Right, so you go down this hall and you pass two other halls, but go down the third. There’s a desk right in front of the meeting room, but if there’s anyone there, ignore them. It should say ‘Meeting Room Two’ on it.”

“Why don’t they use meeting room one?” Elizabeth asked. She repeated the directions in her head so that she didn’t forget them.

“I’ve honestly never even seen a meeting room one.” Eliza shrugged, then waved her hands. “Go on, go and surprise Alexander!”

“It was nice meeting you, Eliza,” Elizabeth began to walk away, not needing to be told twice. “ I’m sure we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other.”

“Oh, and Lizzie?” Eliza called out before Elizabeth was out of earshot. “You do know that Lafayette is in a relationship, right?”

Elizabeth stopped for a moment and ignored the feeling of her heart diving into her feet. She called back, “I do now,” before continuing on her way.

 **To: gil bear <3: **fucker

There was, in fact, someone at the desk in front of the meeting room. Elizabeth went to ignore him and enter the room like Eliza had said to do, but the task was easier said than done.

“Ma’am, you can’t go in there.” He stepped in her way, blocking her from getting in the room.

“And why exactly can’t I?” Elizabeth put a hand on her hip and raised an expectant eyebrow.

“There’s an important meeting going on.” He crossed his arms, making it evident to her that he wasn’t going to budge.

“Well I just so happen to know about that meeting, and I’m needed in there.” She raised her voice, trying to intimidate him, but she knew from experience that it was a little hard to intimidate people when they tower over you.

“Show me your badge then.” He held out his hand for a badge, and she happily supplied Alexander’s. “Secretary Hamilton happens to be in there, so this is a fake, and you’re obviously not him. Listen, lady, you may want to meet the President, but so does everybody. You’re going to have to make an appointment, and even then it’s not guaranteed.”

She went for the second plan in her head; just try to go past him. The second she tried, however, he pushed her back.

“Don’t touch me.” Her voice was still loud, but she couldn’t find it in herself to care.

“You need to leave before I call security.” He warned. “And I’m calling if you don’t leave in the next two minutes.”

“Try me punk.” She made another move for the door and actually got her hand on the door this time. However, her hand ended up on the door completely accidentally; as soon as she tried to move towards the door again, the guy had her up, draped over his shoulder like a rag doll.

Any fucks that Elizabeth had left to give went out the window as she shouted, “I am a good, law abiding citizen! I have every right to meet personally with our president, whether you like it or not! Let go of me, you heathen!”

“Not happening, princess.”

That was the last straw for her. All rational thought left her mind at that comment, except for the one thing her brother had always been adamant on- if anyone ever tries to pick on you, aim for the crotch.

Her foot connected with the man’s crotch, and she was released. He was busy holding himself and shooting daggers at her as she stood up off of the ground and stuck her tongue out at him.

“God, that’ll teach you not to fucking touch me.”

She moved freely to the door now, opening it up as soon as she got there. She grinned wildly at the room's occupants as they all stared at her with varying degrees of shock or confusion (or in Lafayette’s case, pure glee).

“You guys should really work on your security system. Were you aware that it sucks monkey balls?”

Thomas was the first to speak. “What the hell are you doing here?”

She snorted, not taking it personally in the slightest. “Not a, ‘hey, Beth, how are you doing’ or anything? Wow, that’s nice. And anywho, I’m not here to talk to you, Tommy boy.”

“Pip? What are you doing here?” Alex was still processing the situation in front of him as he stared at his friend, flabbergasted.

“Surprise, Lexi!” She grinned at him. She opened her mouth to speak more, only to get interrupted by a limping man joining them.

“Sir, I am so sorry, I’ll get her to security as soon as-”

Washington held up a hand, silencing him. “She can stay, Mr. Jay.”

“Yeah, so beat it, buddy,” Elizabeth added on. She turned to Washington, who was watching her with pure interest on his face. “Mr. G-Wash President Sir, I would like to request Mr. Alexander Hamilton to have the rest of the day off.”

“I don’t know, he does-” Washington began to speak, but Elizabeth wasn’t finished.

“I might add that I really don’t care if you say no; I’ll still take him with me.”

-

“Is Gilbert back yet?” Alex called out from his room to Elizabeth, who was sitting on the couch. They had spent the day out shopping and catching up with each other when Alex remembered that they had wanted to go to Libertea; that, and Peggy would kill him if he missed another open mic night in a row.

“What?” Elizabeth was scrolling through her phone, waiting for Alex to get done changing.

“Is Gilbert there?” Alex yelled again, but not much louder.

“I still can’t hear you.” Elizabeth clicked on a meme, rolled her eyes at it, and continued scrolling. She hardly noticed the front door opening and Thomas and Lafayette walking in.

“Is-” Alex sighed, before shouting, “I’ll just come out there.”

“Hey, Pip!” Lafayette cheerfully said, not having gotten to talk to her that morning.

She looked up from her phone and narrowed her eyes, still pissed that she had to hear from someone else that Gilbert was in a relationship. “Lafayette. Hey, Tommy.”

“So the correct answer would have been yes, Gilbert is back.” Alex quipped, joining them in the living room.

Elizabeth looked at the half-dressed man in disbelief. “I’ve been waiting for what, ten minutes? And you only have managed to put on pants?”

“Shut up, douche canoe.” He turned to Jefferson and Lafayette, the former staring very openly at Alex’s chest. “Laf, do you know where my starry night shirt is, and also where my belt is?”

“I think the shirt is in the dryer and the belt is in the bathroom,” Laf answered, looking past him to Elizabeth. “Are you mad at me?”

“You added more stars.” Elizabeth noticed, ignoring Lafayette.

“Thank you, Laf.” Alex turned back to face Elizabeth. “And, yeah, I did. I added two small ones and three regular ones. I also got the sun and moon tattoos outlined in color.”

“What do the tattoos represent?” Thomas found his voice, small as it was. His mouth felt dry as he ogled Alexander’s form, from his shirtless torso to his hip bones exposed by the jeans hanging dangerously low on his hips.

“The sun and the moon represent my brother and I. It’s something from a letter my mother wrote me.” Alex looked over his shoulder to answer. “The stars everywhere represent people I meet that have an important impact on my life. The two small ones I got are for Pip’s kids and the three regular ones were for people you wouldn’t know. I need to go finish getting dressed.”

Elizabeth beamed, saying, “I can’t believe you got ones for Ellie and Will.”

“Well of course I did, there was no way I wouldn’t add ones for my godchildren.”

As Alex walked back in the direction of the laundry room, Elizabeth called out after him, “I need to have a talk with you and Thomas before we go out!”

“We’ve had talks all day, my dear Pip!” Alex grinned at her over his shoulder.

It was just Lafayette, Elizabeth, and Thomas left, so Lafayette revoiced his early question, slipping into his native tongue.

“Es-tu en colère contre moi?” Lafayette asked, moving to place his arm on Elizabeth’s arm. She shook him off and instead turned to her brother.

She walked up to him and poked him in the chest. “Tommy, dear, do you want to explain to me why when you asked to add your boyfriend into our group chat, you added my best friend of nearly two decades?”

Thomas’ mind went blank for a few moments, but lucky for him, he was a quick thinker. Hardly missing a beat, he responded, “Do you want to tell me why your best friend is my boyfriend and you never thought to tell me that?”

Elizabeth’s eyes searched him up and down, looking for clues to anything. She looked at his neck for hickeys, looked for any sign of disarray, looked for anything misplaced in his figure. She scanned his face for his usual tells of lying; his left eyebrow would usually twitch or his jaw would usually clench slightly.

“You’re such an ass.” She finally said, pushing his shoulder gently.

“You’re an ass, ass.” He responded in jest.

Lafayette watched the exchange between the two siblings. He had been present for many exchanges in the past, and even throughout time, it still didn’t look as if their bond had changed. However, there was still a question at hand.

“Yes, yes, everyone's asses, but one, would someone like to explain to me why Alex is being referred to as Thomas’ boyfriend, and two, why are you mad at me, Elizabeth, mon doux?”

Elizabeth turned to face Lafayette, addressing him for only the second time. “What do you mean, why is Alex-”

“How do I look, Laf?” Alex’s voice piped up from behind them all, causing them to turn around and face him.

Lafayette tried not to sigh at Alex’s interruption. He needed to know why Elizabeth was mad at him, and this was the most she had talked to him thus far. “You look fine, mon amour.”

Alex seized the opportunity to hug his friend, whispering into his ear, “Just go along with it,” as they embraced. Before Lafayette could question him, though, he was pulling away and going to stand by Thomas, who hesitantly wrapped his arm around him. Elizabeth caught the slight hesitance, but instead of encroaching on the topic, she stored it away in her mind for later.

“Actually, Laf, he’s my love.” Thomas heard himself saying, although it didn’t really process. His mind was too focused on the situation at hand. They would have to pretend to be in love for the whole night, or at least, whenever his sister was around. It  _would_  be good practice for being around the rest of his family, he just wished that he had had more time to prepare.

Thomas felt as if he were more of a bystander rather than actually being in the conversation. He responded every so often, but he wasn’t necessarily paying attention. He wasn’t really paying attention at all. All he could think about was how for the rest of the night, Alex would be his boyfriend. Well, not his  _real_ boyfriend, but still.

“Are you there, dear?” Alex’s voice brought him back to the present. The smaller man had one arm around Thomas and his other hand was placed on Thomas’ chest as he looked up at him.

“I’m sorry, what?”

Alex laughed lightly, his smile not faltering once. There was a reason the theater department at Columbia had wanted him; it was nice to know that his skills weren’t faltering over time.

“We’re getting ready to head out for Libertea. You ready?”


	15. wowie,,,,

“You’re fidgeting again.”

“Huh?” Alex snapped out of his daze, looking over at Thomas sitting in the driver’s seat.

“You’re fidgeting.” Thomas wore an amused expression, not taking his eyes off of the road. “Last time we were in a car together, I told you to stop fidgeting.”

“It’s a habit.” Alex went back to staring out of his window. He didn’t stop bouncing his leg up and down, though.

“It’s a nervous habit.” Thomas corrected, “What are you nervous about?”

“Oh, nothing,” Alex rolled his eyes, but it didn’t do any good, seeing as he wasn’t facing Thomas, “just the fact that we’ll be around my closest friends, acting as if we’re dating, and one of them is inevitably going to ask what’s going on and then Elizabeth will know that we aren’t actually dating and then you’ll hate me again because it’ll be all my fault because I won’t have been a good enough fake boyfriend for you and-”

“I’m going to stop you right there, Alexander.” Thomas interrupted. He reached over to Alex’s seat without thinking and grabbed his hand. “You aren’t going to mess anything up, and for the record, you’d be the perfect boyfriend.”

Alex yanked his hand away from Thomas and turned to face him again, ignoring the hurt that flashed across Thomas’ face as he did so.

“You don’t understand, Thomas. If I had known that Pip was your sister, I wouldn’t have agreed to be your fake boyfriend for a week.”

“What does Elizabeth have to do with yo-”

“Absolutely everything.” Alex was fighting the urge to raise his voice, and his words were starting to slur together. “Pip knows me better than anyone else and can see right through anything I do or try to get past her. Being around us ‘together’ for a night will make it beyond obvious to her that we aren’t actually dating, and it will be all my fault because she’ll see you as someone trying their hardest to make it work, but she’ll see me as someone who is trying to hide their feelings for you while also struggling to let the past go and she’ll know immediately.”

“Hold up, backtrack a little, Alexander.” Thomas turned into the parking lot and found a spot near the back. When he turned off the car, he faced Alexander completely. “What did you just say?”

Alex’s eyes widened as he realized what he had let slip. “I said that Pip will see through everything.”

“No, after that.” Thomas could feel his heart speed up at the possibility of Alexander reciprocating his feelings. Yes, he had heard him basically admitting he had feelings to his friends, but since that day, there hadn't been much to prove that statement to be true. He talked slow and drew out his words carefully, as to not make it too obvious at how anxious he was feeling.

Alex was weighing out his possibilities in his mind. He could either repeat what he had said to Thomas, which would inevitably get him laughed at and teased, or he could just get out of the car. The second option won out.

Alex began walking away from the car as soon as he was out of it. Thomas, of course, followed, telling him to slow down.

“Alex, wait up!”

“No, you’re just going to make fun of me.” Nonetheless, Alex stopped and waited for Thomas to catch up. As soon as Thomas was at his side, he grabbed his hand. “I’m only doing this so that your sister will believe us.”

“And because you like me.” Thomas couldn’t help adding, despite the glare he got in response.

“Shut the fuck up.” Alex’s voice came out harsher than he was intending it too, but his point got across. Not a single word was spoken by either of them until they were inside of the café.

“I was beginning to think you weren’t coming!” Peggy joked from behind the counter when they walked in. “Was I reading Pip’s tweets earlier correctly? Is she going to be here, too?”

Before Alex could respond, and he was intending on doing so, Thomas wrapped his arm around Alex’s waist and answered instead.

“If by Pip, you mean my sister, I believe she is planning on joining us.”

Peggy’s eyes grew. “Are you two-” She looked over their shoulders as another person walked in, “we’ll be talking about this later, Alexander. For now, though, your regular table is open and Hercules and John are already there.”

“Thanks, Pegs.” Alex grabbed Thomas’ arm and maneuvered it so that they were holding hands again. As soon as they were out of Peggy’s earshot, he whispered, “Tone it down.”

“If we’re going to make Elizabeth believe we’re together then we need to convince everyone.” Thomas didn’t look down at the smaller man, instead, he was looking around the café for Alex’s friends.

Alex was looking around as well, but for a different reason. He was looking at the other people, looking for people who might ruin things. People who would tell the press if they saw two of the highest people in the government together romantically. It hadn’t crossed his mind before now, but it wasn’t leaving his mind now that it was there.

“Just, tone it down.” Alex shook his head and tried to forget about the possibility of someone ruining his career by outing him to the press. Not that the press didn’t know that he was bisexual, everyone knew that. No, he was scared of the world knowing about his feelings that he had only just come to terms with. “The table is this way.”

He pulled Thomas along, heading towards the very back of the café. The tables were set up in a way that the furthest one was difficult to see if you weren’t looking for it. At that table was Hercules and John, the former rubbing the latter’s back comfortingly.

“Everyone is still planning on coming, right?” Alex asked, pulling out a chair for Thomas next to his own.

Hercules raised his eyebrows suggestively while sending glances between the two of them. John seemed to glare a bit at Thomas, but that was to be expected.

“As far as I know, everyone is planning on coming,” Hercules stated. “What’s going on between you two?”

“Hell if I know,” Thomas replied with ease, crossing his legs under the table. “Alexander, what is going on between us?”

Alex ignored the question and turned to John. “How are you, John?”

“I’m doing fine, Alexander.” John’s tone was clipped. “You?”

“I’m-”

“Hercules! Lexi’s other friend!” Elizabeth’s cheerful voice interrupted. “I believe that Gilbert will be in in a few moments, my hand may have connected with his face. Also, who was that cute girl at the register who knew who I was?”

“Pip! Alex didn’t tell us you were coming!” Hercules stood up to give her a hug. “Why did you hit Laf?”

Elizabeth hugged Hercules back before sitting down by John. “Alex didn’t know I was coming. Also, might I add, you and this other fellow make a cute couple.”

John choked on the tea he was drinking and Hercules’ face turned bright red.

“We’re not-” John tried to say.

She raised one of her eyebrows in confusion. “No? That’s odd, you two definitely gave off a couple vibe.”

“We uh,” Hercules coughed to clear his throat. “We’re working things out.”

“Ah.” She nodded. She then looked over to Thomas and Alex, narrowing her eyes just slightly. She looked between the two of them, thinking. Hercules and John seemed to be closer to each other than Thomas and Alex, but that could just be because they had just gotten there.

“Really? You two are going to be a cute couple if you do date.” Alex commented, leaning into Thomas at the sight of Elizabeth narrowing her eyes. Thomas wrapped his arm around Alex as he leaned in, feeling a smile blossom on his lips.

“I’m Elizabeth, by the way.” She stuck out her hand to John. “Elizabeth Jefferson, Thomas’ twin.”

“John.” He accepted the handshake. “Are you sure you’re Thomas’ twin? You seem much lovelier than he is.”

Thomas placed his free hand on his chest in mock offense. “I am very lovely, thank you very much. Right, Alexander?”

“Whatever floats your boat, dear.” Alex relaxed slightly, thinking to himself, _I can do this_. He batted his eyelashes and Thomas rolled his eyes.

“Okay, je sais que je méritais que, but why the face?” Lafayette asked, walking up to the table and pulling out a chair next to Thomas.

“Is anyone else joining us?” Elizabeth ignored Lafayette, turning her focus to Alex. He seemed natural next to Thomas, but something still seemed off. Then again, she had thought the same about everyone he was with since James; she was very protective over Alex and wary about everyone he had dated since.

“I think Eliza and Maria are, I don’t know about Angelica or Burr, though.” Alex smiled at her. “And before you ask, yes Maria, as in Maria Reynolds.”

Elizabeth grinned. “I can’t remember the last time I saw Maria. I was hoping I’d see her while I was down here, though. I have something to tell the two of you.”

Alex’s smile dropped. “It’s not concerning-”

Elizabeth saw where he was going and cut him off before he could finish the sentence. “No, not at all. Don’t even go there, Alexander.”

“What’re we missing?” Hercules spoke up, watching the two talk with sudden interest.

“C’est ne rien.” Lafayette looked between the two of them, following vaguely what the exchange was about. “It’s nothing.”

“Now I’m interested.” John leaned forward slightly. “What’s going on?”

Alex and Elizabeth didn’t look away from each other as Elizabeth answered, “It’s truly nothing. If Alexander hasn’t told you thus far, it’s probably not important. He’d tell you if it was.”

Thomas looked between his twin and Alex, trying to connect the dots. The silence that had fallen was getting tenser by the second until it was broken by a new voice entering the conversation.

“Is this a bad time? Should we come back later?” Eliza’s tone was borderline sardonic, but all in good jest. “Maria, this is Alex’s friend-”

“Elizabeth Beatrice Jefferson, why the fuck did you not tell me you were going to be here?” Elizabeth whipped around, breaking eye contact with Alex, and stood up so fast her chair nearly knocked over. Maria let go of Eliza’s hand to open her arms so she could hug Elizabeth.

“I’ve missed you so much, Maria.” Elizabeth hugged her tightly. “It’s been way too long.”

Maria tightly embraced her, burrowing her head in Elizabeth’s neck. “I’ve missed you too, Tris. I need to talk to you about something as soon as possible.”

“I’m guessing you two already know each other?” Eliza asked, trying to ignore the slight swell of jealousy.

Maria let go sheepishly, going back to her girlfriend’s side. “Yeah, Tris is like a sister to me. She helped me and Alex through a tough time, and she’s been there for me whenever I’ve needed her since.”

Elizabeth sat back down and smirked. “Eliza, when you mentioned that your girlfriend was Maria, I wasn’t expecting her to be a hot Maria.”

Maria rolled her eyes, flipping her off as Eliza tried to maintain her calm facade. Elizabeth, however, saw the slight movement of her lip and how her eyes changed and started laughing.

“Jealousy is a fickle thing, is it not?” She crossed her arms and leaned back. “Don’t you worry, sweet Eliza. If I had any romantic interest in Maria, she would have been mine a long time ago.”

“You’re too full of yourself, Elizabeth,” Thomas commented.

“I wouldn’t say it if it weren’t true, Thomas.” Elizabeth didn’t miss a beat as she quipped back.

“A more appropriate response would have been,” Maria started, pulling out a seat for Eliza and then sitting next to her, “‘You have three moods, Elizabeth. A four-year-old, Sherlock Holmes, and a hell demon’”

“Hey now.” Elizabeth mock pouted. “I actually came to DC to have a good time and spread some good news, and honestly I’m feeling so attacked right now.”

“You meme loving fuck.” Alexander shook his head. He turned around, thinking he heard his name being called, to see Peggy walking up to the table.

“We’re opening, Alex. You’re third on the list, as always.” She informed him. He nodded, and she turned to leave, only for Elizabeth’s voice to stop her.

“Ma’am, I hate to be a bother, but can I order a drink while you’re over here so I can keep catching up with Alex and Maria?”

Peggy grinned at her and nodded. “Of course! I’m guessing you know the menu then?”

Elizabeth subtly blinked a few times, lightly biting her lip. She looked Peggy up and down, making it noticeable, but not completely obvious, before saying in a sweet voice, “I do, but what I want isn’t exactly on the menu.”

Elizabeth ignored the two voices behind her muttering ‘oh my god’ (both for very different reasons) and blinked a few more times. She noticed the muscles in Peggy’s throat moving, the way her jaw clenched slightly, how her pupils dilated and knew that her actions did not go unobserved.

“I’m not sure that I’m allowed to let people order anything that isn’t on the menu.” Peggy was trying her hardest to keep her voice steady, well aware of Lafayette’s eyes on her.

“Really?” Elizabeth pouted slightly and gave off an innocent look. “That’s a shame. If not, then how about a tall glass of whatever you think is best?”

Peggy swallowed and took a deep breath, nodding as she did so. She tried her best to put the pep back into her voice as she said, “I can do that!” She turned around then, trying her hardest to clear her thoughts.

Elizabeth turned back to the table with a grin on her face. “Where were we?”

Hercules and Maria both began to laugh, noticing the expression on Lafayette’s face. Alex rolled his eyes and leaned more into Thomas’ side, whereas Eliza looked unamused and Lafayette was downright pissed.

“You were going to tell the good news?” Alex provided. “Also, I believe we left out ‘supreme seductress’ as one of your moods.”

“Oh yes!” She clapped a few times and looked over her shoulder, hearing Peggy announce the first act. Lafayette pursed his lips and crossed his arms, seething from the show she had just put on. Elizabeth noticed immediately and turned to him before she informed everyone of what was going on. “You’d better chill the fuck out because you have no room to be pissed about me flirting with someone.”

“Je fais quand vous êtes flirter avec ma petite amie,” He bit back. She only rolled her eyes in response to him.

“Get a move on, Pip.” Thomas playfully said, stuck between being upset with her for flirting with his friend’s girlfriend and upset with his friend for hurting his sister.

“Don’t call me that, fuck face.” She quipped back, before continuing with her news.

“So, a few weeks ago I was offered a government position that would have me stationed out here. Normally, when it comes to government jobs or any job for that matter, I say fuck it. But this one, I had thought, would be a great opportunity because I have my best friends living out here, my twin living out here the majority of the time, the man I had thought loved me,” she sent a glare towards Lafayette, “living out here, and there would be a lot more opportunities open for my kids. Today I had a meeting with the person in control of the position, and I accepted it.”

“Pip that’s amazing!” Alex’s eyes widened in happiness. He had lived apart from his best friend for so long, and now she’d be near again.

“Elizabeth, oh my god.” Lafayette’s face had gone slack, his mind stuck somewhere between being happy and angry.

Thomas had a small smile on his face, but something was on his mind that wouldn’t go away. “Speaking of, where are your kids?”

Elizabeth pursed her lips and took a deep breath. Of course, her brother would ask about that. “They’re with their father in fucking England.”

“You have kids?” John asked. “It’s cool that you’ll be living near here, too.”

“She has two, William and Eloise. They’re lovely children.” Hercules informed him, taking a leap of faith and grabbing John’s hand. Alex noticed and gave Hercules a discreet thumbs up.

“I’m very excited for you, Tris.” Maria gave a soft smile to her friend, which was the first clue that something was wrong with her. If anything, Elizabeth had expected Maria to be jumping for joy. Instead, the smile she wore was barely a real one, and her eyes held a panic and fear that Elizabeth had not seen in a long time. She looked closer, and noticed that Maria’s eyes were pinks around the edges and slightly puffy; she had been recently crying. Maria was definitely not okay.

Elizabeth raised an inquisitorial eyebrow at Maria, and she knew in an instant that Elizabeth saw through her facade. She shook her head towards her, hoping that she wouldn’t ask anything, at least not while Alex was around. Elizabeth pursed her lips a bit, before saying, “I’m excited to be down here, as well.”

“Pip!” Peggy called out from the counter.

Elizabeth pushed herself away from the table, announcing that she was going to get her drink. Alex caught the mischievous glint in her eyes, to which he shook his head with a smile. Some things would never change, and Elizabeth’s troublesome streak was one of those things.

As soon as she was out of earshot, Thomas turned to Lafayette. “You didn’t tell her that you and Peggy were together?”

Lafayette tried to look anywhere but Thomas and Alex. He felt guiltier than anything, especially knowing that Elizabeth would be living in a closer proximity soon. “I didn’t mean to.”

Alex snorted. “Oh, you didn’t mean to break the heart of the girl who has been in love with you since college?”

“She’s loved him for that long?” Eliza asked. “That’s sweet.”

Lafayette’s face turned beet red and he tried to ignore his mind screaming at him. He looked towards Elizabeth, who was leaning against the counter talking to Peggy.

“So, you know my name, what does a girl like myself have to do to get yours?” Elizabeth raised one of her eyebrows and gave a half smile.

“Margarita Schuyler.” Peggy’s heart sped up slightly and she tried to keep her breathing under control. “Please, call me Peggy, I’m Peggy.”

“Call you? That’s exactly what I’d like to do.” Elizabeth twirled a piece of hair around her finger. “Can I get your number, Peggy?”

Peggy closed her eyes and took a deep breath. This woman was getting into her head and she didn’t know how. “Uh, yeah. But you should know that I’m in a relationship.”

“Well, that’s good for you, Peggy.” She observed Peggy closely. She could tell that she was starting to question things and that Elizabeth had successfully planted herself in her thoughts. “I don’t recall asking you on a date. I do want your phone number, though-” she flitted her eyes to Peggy’s lips and then back up to make eye contact, “for personal reasons. You know, like friendship.”

She could feel her heartbeat speed up as she shakily grabbed a piece of paper and scribbled out her number onto it. “Oh, right, of course.” She handed the paper to Elizabeth, who didn’t break eye contact as she pocketed the paper.

“I’ll text you later, Peggy.”

She turned on her heel and walked back to the table, noticing that Alex wasn’t there anymore.

“He’s getting ready to perform,” Thomas answered her question before it had time to leave her mouth.

“He’s a lovely performer, he’ll probably be talking shit about John Adams or something like that.” She leaned back in her chair and took a sip of her drink. “I got the cute barista’s number, in case anyone was wondering.”

She took out her phone as it vibrated in her pocket.

 **mary:** I won’t be at Monticello next week, even if Thomas’ boyfriend is there.

“You mean Peggy?” Eliza asked, to which Elizabeth nodded. “Peggy is Lafayette’s girlfriend, you know that right.”

“You know, it’s nice that you’re here to tell me who everyone is dating, Eliza.” Elizabeth dryly spoke. All traces of the fun, childish Elizabeth was gone at the text from her sister. Even further, she didn’t not like Eliza, per say, but she also wasn’t finding it particularly easy to like her. “Otherwise I would have never known.”

“Oh, well, you’re welcome,” Eliza said in response.

“It was sarcasm.” Elizabeth deadpanned. “It would take a blind man to ignore the relationships in this friend group. For instance, Hercules and John are dating but keeping it to themselves, you can tell in the body language. Alexander and Thomas are trying to fool me into thinking that they are dating when really, they’re both in love with each other but have sticks so far up their asses that they can’t let go of their pride to admit it. Maria and you are obviously dating, I could see that the moment you two walked in. It took me longer than I would have liked to notice, but I also noticed that Maria is upset about something. And last but not least, I had no doubt in my mind that Peggy and Gilbert were dating, I don’t see how anyone could miss that.”

She pushed her chair out, suddenly aware of everyone staring at her. She did not feel the same excitement that she had felt earlier about being here and with everyone and instead felt a burden. She looked to Thomas, who was trying to process what she had just said. “I need to go and call Mary. I don’t know if I’ll be back in, but tell Alex that I will see him soon.”

With that, she stood up and went to leave the café.

 

 

“I need to go talk to her,” Maria said immediately, following after before anyone could respond.

Maria moved at a slight jog, needing to catch Elizabeth before she made the call. The information was burning in her mind and she needed to tell Elizabeth.

“Tris, wait.” She slowed as she walked outside, seeing Elizabeth leaning against the wall dialing her phone.

“What’s wrong?” Elizabeth asked, clicking her phone off and pocketing it.

Maria took a deep breath to calm her nerves. “Earlier, I had a visit from my brother.”

“Okay, and?” Elizabeth wasn’t exactly connecting the dots on what was so bad about her brother.

“Tris, I only have one brother.” Maria ran a hand through her hair, still trying to process the information herself. “James is my only brother.”


	16. mmm whatcha say

Peggy sat on the counter, swinging her legs back and forth as she talked to Alexander. Lafayette was not home, which was a good thing in her mind.

“I just don’t know what to do, Alex.” She complained, her voice borderline whining. “I love Laf and all, but Elizabeth hasn’t left my mind since Tuesday.”

Alex was moving gracefully through the kitchen, grabbing various items he needed. The whole group was coming over later to celebrate Thanksgiving early, considering the majority of them wouldn’t be in town for the actual holiday. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but Elizabeth hasn’t left Laf’s mind, either.”

“What’s the history between the two of them, anyways?” She questioned, truly interested. Things had seemed beyond tense between them, and Lafayette doesn’t usually get tense when Alexander isn't involved.

Alex ran a hand through his already messy hair after setting the pasta noodles on the counter. “Laf and Pip dated for several years before they broke up because of her job. Then, she asked one of her friends to help her get pregnant through artificial insemination, which Laf took at a betrayal because he thought that they would one day start a family together. They were both still in love for a long time, and then Laf started dating you. And he loves you, Peggy, don’t think he doesn’t, but please recognize that he still loves Pip, too.”

“It was kind of obvious.” Peggy agreed. “I just don’t know where to go from here. Especially if both of us can’t stop thinking about her instead of each other.”

Alex rolled his eyes at his friend’s melodramatic behavior. He got out a cutting board and knife, beginning to cut his vegetables. “Have you ever thought of, oh I don’t know, a polyamorous relationship?”

She sighed and plucked a cherry tomato from the cutting board. “Laf would never do anything of the sort, you know that just as well as I do.”

“Well, obviously you don’t know Laf as well as I do.” He dumped the vegetables into one of the saucepans he had out, turning the heat on low. “You don’t think that spaghetti is too informal for a Thanksgiving dinner, do you?”

“I don’t think it’s informal, I just think it’s odd. Your spaghetti is always good, though.” Alex was absentmindedly listening to her, moving around the kitchen once again as he filled his other pot with water and set it on the burner on high. “And what do you mean that I don’t know him?”

“I mean that he and I were in a polyamorous relationship for several months, but it didn’t work out because I’m a wreck. You three would last, though, and I know that Pip would be for it.” He added a pinch of salt to the water before stopping to look directly at her in complete seriousness. “I was thinking green beans, salad, and garlic bread for sides, and I also made Tiramisu for dessert. Is that too little, enough, or too much?”

“I don’t know, it all sounds fine to me.” She shrugged, grabbing Alex’s phone as it buzzed on the counter. “You have like six texts, Jesus on a rowboat, Alex.”

He snatched his phone from her and stirred the pot with his vegetables in it. “I wasn’t aware that there were that many.”

 **Pip (Elizabeth J):** what the fUCK  
**Pip (Elizabeth J):** im gonna punt gilbert in his freaking balls

 **jeffershithead:** what time do i need to be over  
**jeffershithead:** ????????  
**jeffershithead:** aleXANder  
**To: jeffershithead:** Come over around 7, you can help set up.

 **[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] Pip (Elizabeth J):** mary won’t be coming to monti for thanksgiving btw  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] jeffershithead:** of course she isnt, when has she ever showed up to anything important lmao  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] (Unknown Number):** I’m literally on a date, assholes. Shut up so my phone stops going off.  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] (Unknown Number):** Watch your fucking language, Lucy. Also, uSE PROTECTION !!

“I had nine, for your information, Peggy.” Alex childishly stuck his tongue out at her, only to find that she had moved from behind the counter to the couch, where she was lying face down.

“Don’t mind me, just dying over here.” Her voice was muffled, but she shouted to ensure that she’d be heard.

Alex pursed his lips and turned his phone back on, going to Elizabeth’s contact and hitting the call button. He tossed his phone at Peggy, laughing when she groaned as it hit her. “Talk to her, talk about a possible poly relationship between the three of you.”

“Why would I- Uh, hi Elizabeth. It’s Peggy.” She shot Alex a glare, but he could tell that underneath, she was grateful.

“Go talk somewhere else so you don’t interrupt my cooking,” Alex told her, turning back to his vegetables that were now turning into a sauce. “Also, tell her if she’s anywhere in the area that she should come over for dinner, 7:30 sharp.”

“Got it, mom.” Peggy hollered back as she walked away. “Sorry, I was talking to Alex.”

Alex added his pasta to the boiling water, turning the heat down as he did so. He stirred his sauce a bit more and got out the vegetables for salad, but all he could think about was the coming week. He had only a half day of work left before he’d be leaving to spend an entire week alone with Thomas. Well, not completely alone, his family would be there for a portion of the time. He started cutting his vegetables, getting more and more lost in thought.

He had already messed up and admitted that he had feelings for the man, what else could happen? Actually, a lot could happen that he’d rather not think about. Of course, right when he was starting to feel comfortable around Thomas, he fucks everything up. He grabbed a bowl and put the components of the salad into it, pouring in some dressing and tossing it as he thought. He’d be posing as Thomas’ boyfriend for the whole next week, surely things would be tense the whole week and someone was bound to notice.

Peggy walked back into the kitchen as Alex was draining the noodles. She placed his phone on the counter, watching him as he maneuvered around the room flawlessly. He mixed the pasta with the sauce and moved on to the bread, cutting up a loaf as he thought.

“Laf said that he’ll be here in about ten minutes,” Peggy informed him, sneaking another cherry tomato out of the salad.

“I sent you away to talk to Pip, not to Laf,” Alex replied, batting her hand away as she tried to get another one. “Is she in the area?”

“No, but she said that she’d like to talk to you before Thomas comes over, that is if he does come over.” Peggy ran a hand through her hair, thinking about how she needed to dye it again soon; the dark purple was fading into a pastel color, and while it is lovely, it’s not what she wanted. “Uh, I told her that I can’t get her out of my head.”

“And what did she say?” He grabbed the garlic butter he had made the night previous, spreading it onto each slice as he spoke.

“She said that she feels the same, but she doesn’t think Laf would be open to a polyamorous relationship.” Peggy rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly. “I just wish I knew what to do.”

Alex hummed in response and stuck the bread in the oven. “I call bullshit on that, but whatever. Can you watch the food and make sure nothing burns for me? I’m going to call Elizabeth.”

He wiped his hands on his pants as he dialed, stepping into his room. She answered on the second ring, no surprise to Alex.

“My brother is coming over, correct?” She immediately cut to the chase, wasting no time with pleasantries.

“Yes, I believe so.” Alex looked at himself in the mirror, thinking about what he needed to change into.

“Push your boundaries.” She deadpanned. “Make a move.”

“What do you mean?” Alex asked, suddenly wary.

“You know what I mean, Lexi.” Elizabeth’s voice was neither accusatory or upset, instead, it was kind and understanding. “Just do it.”

She hung up before he could respond, looking over at her brother as she did so. “He’ll push his boundaries, but you’re going to have to be the one to make the first move.”

Thomas shared a smile with her. He looked down to respond to a text from Alex as he also responded to her. “If I can find the right moment to do so, I will.”

 **lil twit <3: ** Come over around 7, you can help set up.  
**To: lil twit <3: ** what should i wear? casual or dressy or…..?  
**lil twit <3: **Casual, but like, you casual, not me casual. Also, I’d dress warmly if I were you.

“I’d bring an extra set of clothes if I were you, you know, for work tomorrow,” Elizabeth commented, her upper lip twisting up in a bit of a knowing smirk.

“He’s kissed me before.” Thomas found himself saying, not exactly completely sure on why the words were coming out of his mouth. “And then he ran away. What if something similar happens?”

“The difference is, Thomas, that you’ll be the one initiating the kiss.”

Twenty minutes later, Thomas found himself standing outside of Alex and Gilbert’s apartment, getting ready to knock. He lifted his hand, only to be stopped mid-knock by the door opening.

“You’re in the way,” Peggy commented, pushing past him with Gilbert in tow. Both of them held what looked like Butane Burners in their hands as they made their way to the elevator.

“Alexander, I’m here,” Thomas called out as he entered the apartment, closing the door behind him.

“In the kitchen!” Alex called out. He took the green beans off of the burner and put the lid on them to keep the heat in. He was bustling about the kitchen like a bee when Thomas walked in. Thomas leaned against the counter and watched, noticing how even amidst the chaos, Alex still moved in an orderly fashion. Before Thomas could say anything, Alex continued speaking, well aware of Thomas’ presence. “Are we acting as a couple tonight or as friends?”

 _Well, fuck._ Thomas thought to himself. He hadn’t thought that far, and honestly, he had just kind of assumed that they’d be acting as a couple. _Here goes nothing._

“It’s up to you because you know what my answer will be.” Thomas sounded ominous as he tried to hide the fact that he hadn’t thought that far. He crossed his arms and leaned a bit more on the wall.

“So we’re going as friends?” Alex furrowed his eyebrows together, but it didn’t really matter because he wasn’t facing Thomas.

“I mean if that’s what you want, but I was planning on going as a couple,” Thomas responded, not exactly expecting that to have been Alex’s reply.

“Oh, well, in that case, go grab the tablecloth and candles from the hall closet, boyfriend.” Thomas followed his instructions and grabbed the items. Alex held his saucepan with his sauce in it and motioned for Thomas to follow him. He did, following him out of the apartment to the elevator.

“Do you guys not eat in the apartment?” Thomas wanted to hit himself in the head; of course, they didn’t eat in the apartment, that’s why they were taking things to wherever they were going.

“No, the apartment is way too crowded,” Alex responded, his mind wandering to too many places at once. “We eat on the roof.”

“You eat on the what?”

“We eat on the roof.” Alex got out of the elevator as it opened, not waiting behind for Thomas. He placed the sauce on one of the Butane burners that Peggy and Laf had set up. He asked them to go and get the rest of the food and leave a note on the door to tell the others to come up, well aware of Thomas following him like a lost dog. “Come over here, Thomas.”

Thomas complied immediately, almost too quickly. _How curious._ Alex stored the information away for a later time that he could hopefully use it.

“Okay, you hold the candles, let me have the tablecloth.” Alex maneuvered it out of his hands, taking it over to the large wooden picnic table in the middle of the roof. He placed it carefully on the table and gestured for the candles. He placed them where they needed to be. “So you’ll sit here, and I’ll be sitting right next to you.”

Over the next fifteen minutes, Alex’s friends all trickled in and everyone got their food and was seated. True to his word, Alex was sat next to Thomas, on his right side.

“It’s Alex’s year, isn’t it?” Eliza asked as she took a bite of her bread. “Laf, you want to start?”

“Oui, of course.” Laf had a wicked glint in his eyes. “Mon ami, do you remember the Hamilton Chronicles?”

“Oh god.” Alex rolled his eyes. “I do.”

“Well, for those of you who don’t,” Lafayette began speaking, most of it confusing Thomas.

“What’s going on?” Thomas leaned over to Alex, whispering in his ear.

Alex leaned over to Thomas, Elizabeth’s voice telling him to push his boundaries as he placed his hand on Thomas’ upper thigh. “Every year we have someone to be thankful of, and basically, we recount all of their embarrassments over the years of knowing them. This year it’s my year.”

Thomas’ breath hitched a bit, not expecting Alex’s move. He nodded to show that he understood what was going on and Alex leaned back into his own space, his hand not moving from Thomas’ leg.

Thomas tried to focus on the conversation happening around him instead of the hand on his leg. He went to take a bite of his spaghetti, only to start spluttering as Alex’s hand began to travel up his leg.

“You good over there, Jefferson?” John asked, raising his eyebrows over his glass of water.

Thomas fought to swallow, and when he finally did, he nodded. “All good, spaghetti just went down the wrong pipe.”

The movements didn’t stop there, no. If anything, that was just the beginning. Through the whole dinner, Alex’s hand seemed to be wandering until suddenly, people were saying goodnight, and the friends of Alex’s that didn’t work with him were wishing him a good Thanksgiving break.

“Thanks for helping clean up, you two.” Alex thanked Peggy and Lafayette before they left. They were the last two to go and Thomas had been awaiting this moment since he had left his apartment.

“Of course, Lex!” Peggy kissed his cheek. “I’ll see you after the break?”

“You will indeed.” He hugged her back, before hugging Lafayette as well. “Use protection, you two.”

“Oh, I could say the same for you two.” Lafayette rolled his eyes and gave Thomas a hug, too. He whispered in Thomas’ ear as they hugged, “Pip told me your plans. I give you my blessing.”

 _Push your boundaries._ Elizabeth’s voice said in Alex’s head.

“Do you want to stay the night, Thomas?” Alexander found himself asking. “I can go grab you some clothes.”

“That’d be nice, actually.” Thomas chose his words carefully, knowing that if anything was going to happen, he needed to go about it carefully.

Alex nodded, and before walking to his room, said, “I’m going to change while I’m in there too, just so you know. Just in case you think I’m taking too long.”

Alex went over his options as he stood in his room. He could either wear his normal sleepwear and make the first move himself, or he could-

Thomas was drawn out of thought by the sound of a door closing. He stood up to turn around and face Alex, all thoughts leaving his mind as he saw the other man. Alex’s hair was held back loosely in a bun, a few hairs falling out and framing his face. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, all of his tattoos on display. His pants were hanging dangerously low on his hips and by the looks of it, he had forgone underwear.

“Dear lord, Alexander,” Thomas said quietly, just loud enough for Alex to hear. He ran a hand through his hair, turning away from him to try and collect his thoughts.

A flash of doubt went through Alex. However, Elizabeth’s voice was repeating in his head and that’s what convinced him to walk up to Thomas and tap on his shoulder, his eyes bearing confusion.

“What’s wr-”

Alexander was cut off by Thomas whipping around, grabbing his face in his hands and muttering, “You’re going to be the death of me.” With that, he closed the minuscule gap between them and leaned down to cover Alex’s lips in his.

Alex immediately responded, melting into the kiss. He wrapped his arms around Thomas’ waist, who wrapped his arms around Alex’s neck. Alex’s tongue found itself asking for entrance at Thomas’ mouth, which opened as soon as possible. They fought for dominance until Alex inevitably won.

Thomas let out a moan as Alex nibbled on his lip. Alex then broke away from him for a moment, looking at Thomas with lidded eyes and asking, “Bedroom?”


	17. o shit whaddup

Normally days before a break were filled with stress for Alex, however, today the smile couldn’t seem to leave his face. Even after Eliza commented on his ‘ungodly sex glow’, the grin didn’t leave. He made his way to the meeting room, running into Lafayette on his way in.

“Are you actually coming to another meeting?” Alex teased his friend.

“Give me a break.” Lafayette snapped one of Alex’s suspenders. “Why do you look sweaty?”

As Alex opened the door, he responded, “Morning sex is a wonderful thing, is it not?”

“I didn’t need to know that, asshole.” He walked in after Alex, noticing the only other person there yet was James. “You hear this disgusting nonsense, Madison?”

“Gilbert,” James didn't look up from his phone as his bored voice said, “I once walked in on you and Thomas comparing dick sizes.”

Alex snorted. “I’ve seen both and-”

“Alexander Hamilton, don’t you dare finish that sentence,” James warned, this time looking up.

Alex’s grin grew a bit. He crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair, putting his legs up on the table and crossing them. “Aw, are you feeling left out, Jem? I could just as easily include you in on that because I’ve seen yours too, in fact, I've seen yours quite a bit, and-”

Alex trailed off as the door to the conference room opened, Thomas walking in. He made eye contact with Alex, who looked away rather quickly. As he looked away, he looked straight at Lafayette, who wore a suggestive expression. Lafayette wiggled his eyebrows, nudging Alex with his shoulder.

Thomas appeared as if sitting caused him pain. James snorted, saying, “You alright there? What were doing that made you so sore?”

“Shut up,” Thomas muttered, the tips of his ears turning red.

“Thomas, are you wearing a new shampoo?” James teased further. “It’s really strong. Smell like flowers or fruit, maybe.”

“Did he use Peggy’s shampoo?” Lafayette mouthed to Alex.

In response, Alex shrugged his shoulders, mouthing, “I wasn’t even aware he showered.”

“Look at those two being secretive.” James’ tone was still taunting; it was a tone that Alex knew like the back of his hand. “Almost like it’s Alexander that Gilbert is dating, not Margarita.”

Alex and Lafayette looked back at the other two in the room. James was facing Thomas with a mocking look and Thomas was looking back at him with thinly veiled frustration.

Alex put an end to the teasing by saying, “I’d certainly hope that Laf and I aren’t dating. I may be a whore, but I’m not a cheater, and, well, if I were in a relationship then my activities last night would have definitely been cheating.”

James and Lafayette both groaned. Thomas’ head turned to face him, his eyes asking a silent question of,  _did you really just say that?_ Alex winked at him facetiously, before asking, “Did you use the dark blue shampoo bottle this morning?”

Thomas nodded a single time. Alex’s grin managed to grow a bit more. He turned back to Lafayette and nodded. “He used Peggy’s.”

The door opened again. Washington walked in, looking less stressed than anyone had seen him in the past month.”Alexander, feet.” He took his feet off of the table almost immediately, causing a laugh out of Lafayette at his friends’ immediate submission. “Don’t you be laughing, Gilbert, this is only your second meeting in the past year.”

Lafayette shrugged and nodded his head in agreement. “Eh, probably.”

Washington looked around the room,  only seeing the four of them. On any other day, it would worry him that the attendance was so low, but it was a half day of work before a break; it made sense that there were so few people. He’d probably be more worried if everyone had shown up.

Alex tuned out the beginning of what Washington was saying. Instead, he took out his phone that was vibrating in his pocket.

 **best of wives:** hurry out of your morning meeting? maria is here to talk to you and she has something for you. she says it’s urgent.  
**To:** **best of wives:** I’ll be there ASAP.

“Other than that, you all are free to leave whenever you’d like today.”

“Maria is here to talk to me,” Alex mumbled to Lafayette, standing before Washington had his last word out. He felt his anxiety rising slightly, fearing the worst already.

Lafayette grabbed his arm and looked in his friend’s eyes. “Relax, mon lion. Whatever it is, it’s going to be okay.”

Alex took a deep breath, aware of the other occupants in the room staring at the two of them. “I’ll see you later.”

He walked briskly down the hall. He got to his office quickly. Eliza and Maria were talking to each other in hushed voices outside of the office. Maria had an envelope in her hand, her hand gripping it so tightly that he could see the white of her knuckles. Eliza motioned to Alex, causing Maria to turn and look at him.

“Come on.” He gestured for her, unlocking his door and letting the two of them in.

Eliza kissed Maria on the cheek and gave a sympathetic look to Alex. She sat behind her desk then, unlocking her computer.

Alex led Maria into the room, turning the lights on as he did so. She shut the door behind her. Alex sat down in the swivel chair behind his desk and she followed suit, sitting in the chair opposite of him.

“What’s up, Maria?” Alex broke the uncomfortable silence that they had fallen into after a few lengthy moments. Maria held out her hand with the envelope, her fist shaking. _Remember, Pip told you that it was best._

Alex furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and cautiously accepted it. It was a pale yellow, with nothing written on the front. It was sealed with a blue Eeyore sticker, a pen outline around it.

“I’m sorry, Lex.” Maria rushed out the words before he opened it. “I don’t know what’s in it, but whatever it is, I’m sorry.”

Alex didn’t know how to respond, so for once, he held his tongue and didn’t respond. He opened the envelope, taking extra care as to not rip the sticker. He almost gasped aloud at the handwriting, multiple memories flooding to him all at once. Handwriting on notes left for him in different places. Handwriting on grocery lists made hastily at seven in the morning before work. Handwriting on bills littering the kitchen counter. Handwriting on the calendar marking important dates and upcoming events. Handwriting on the fridge, telling the food menu for the week. Handwriting on the bathroom mirror reminding Alex to take his meds. Handwriting on the back of his hand, reminding him of meetings and such.

Alex could feel his anxiety intensify. All he could see was the handwriting, not what it was saying. Normally he wouldn’t recognize handwriting, but this handwriting- it was an elegant scrawl that Alex always teased about, said it ‘reminded him of his mother’- he had seen every day for nearly two years.

This was James Reynolds’ handwriting.

Alex looked up from the letter to Maria, and then back to the letter. _Keep reading,_ he urged himself. _Or, rather, begin reading._

**_Alexander-_ **

**_Looking good Andy. Thought I’d start off with that so you’d know that it is, in fact, me._ **

**_I am sorry._ ** **_Not that I’ve seen you recently, but I’m assuming you’re looking good. You always do. I forced myself to distance myself from you after the first two years. Before then, I was still looking over you. Then you changed your last name back._ **

**_~~I am sorry~~. _ ** **_Not that you were wrong to do so, you had every right to change your last name back._ **

**_~~I am sorry~~. _ ** **_You didn’t deserve this, you deserved none of this._ **

**_~~I am sorry~~. I never wanted to hurt you. _ **

**_I_ ** **_am  _** ** _still alive, to this day. That is, assuming I haven’t died in the time since I gave Maria this letter._ **

**_I forged your signature on divorce papers; I didn’t want you to be bound by the restraints of marriage to me after I “died”. You had every right to move on, and I wanted you to._ **

**_Andy, I love you. I always will. I am sorry._ **

**_-James x._ **

Alex could feel his hand shaking and his heart thumping. He tried to keep his face impassive as he stood up from his desk and walked over to one of his cabinets. He opened the bottom one and reached towards the back, well aware of Maria’s eyes on him. He found the bottle he was searching for and brought it out of the cabinet, only to find it empty with a sticky note on it reading, ‘Whiskey is not for work. xoxo, Madison’

“God damn it,” Alex muttered.

“What’s wrong?” Maria asked, her eyes flitting between the letter, Alex, and the bottle in his hands with the lime green sticky note.

“James took my fucking whiskey.” He blew air out of his nose sharply.

“James?” She questioned, figuring he didn’t mean her brother, but it could still be a possibility.

“Madison. James Madison. James I was engaged to, but didn't marry.” He leaned forward and placed his forehead against the cool metal of the cabinet. “That fucker.”

Maria pushed her previous thought of it behind her brother out of her head. She then tried to change the topic back to the letter. “Alex, I’m so sorry.”

“16 years.” He murmured, his eyes closed as he took deep breaths to calm himself.

“What?” She asked, finding herself confused.

“I had to watch him die and then live with the image of him being shot in front of me in my mind for 16 years.” Alex had a bit of anger coming up, but he tried to suppress it. Maria didn’t deserve to deal with his temper. “Maria, you should go.”

She cautiously stood, knowing how he gets when his emotions run awry. “I’m sorry, Alexander. You don’t deserve this.”

“Please, Maria.”

No further prompting was needed for her. She left Alex alone in his office. Maria ignored Eliza’s questions when she got out of the office, heading directly for the only person who she thought could calm her friend successfully.

Inside his office, now alone, Alex kicked the still open drawer shut. He threw the empty bottle forcefully into the trashcan. He grabbed the letter sitting on his desk and ripped it in half, throwing that away as well. His anger was bubbling up more and more, and before he was even consciously aware of what he was doing, his fist was flying towards the wall. On contacts, pain blossomed in his hand, not a single mark left on the wall. He stumbled away from the wall a bit.

“God fucking damn it.” He didn’t bother keeping his voice down, frankly not caring if Eliza heard him.

Alex cradled his hand to his chest, blinking away the tears that sprung to his eyes. The red-hot pain in his hand was distracting him so much that he didn’t realize when his office door was opening again.

“Really now?” The person asked, his voice quiet but still serious. “What did the wall ever do to you?”

Alex spun around to see who was there. Upon seeing his friend he almost burst into tears. Well, no. He did burst into tears. James took Alex into his arms, running a hand through his hair comfortingly.

The two of them stood there, Alex crying into James’ shirt, for a few moments before either of them moved. The first one to move was James, who maneuvered the two of them until James was sat in one of the chairs with Alex sideways on his lap. James hugged Alex to his chest and remained silent until he felt Alex’s tears slow for the most part.

“I’m sorry about your shirt,” Alex muttered into his chest.

“It’s fine, Alex.” James hugged tightly. “Do you have a first aid kit in here?”

Alex shook his head against James’ chest. His tears had almost completely stopped. His hand was throbbing and his head was starting to do the same.

“Okay, well here’s what we’re going to do.” James moved Alex around until he was facing him. “We’re going to do to Thomas’ office and fix your hand. Then, you’re going to go and have a wonderful week with him. And you are not going to let this affect you because James is an ass who is not worth your time. Hell, just keep living like he’s dead because he’s dead to me and should be to you.”

Alex shook his head again. “No, Jem, I couldn’t possibly-”

“Alexander.” James’ voice was strict, causing Alex to look up, his eyes wide, red, and swollen. “You say you can’t, but I know you can.” James placed a small kiss on Alex’s forehead, so light that Alex couldn’t tell if it was even there. “I know you can.”

James wiped away the few tears left on Alex’s face. Alex cracked a small smile and asked, “Why didn’t we ever go through with the marriage?”

“Because I was not the best for you by any means.” James mused, moving until they were both standing again. "Not to mention, my best friend has had feelings for you for quite some time."

“Thomas has feelings for me?” Alex’s eyes grew wide as the information sunk in.

“I thought you knew that?” James shrugged. “I guess I probably should’ve asked Thomas if he had told you.”

Alex thought for a few moments before he spoke again. “And I know he knows that I have feelings for him.”

James nodded. “He was eavesdropping the day you were yelling and admitted it because that’s who he is.”

“I thought so. I also let it slip the other day.”

He tried to put all thoughts of his, well ex now, husband out of his head. It wasn’t necessarily working, but he also had thoughts of Thomas and the upcoming week starting to fill his head, along with the thought of maybe having broken his hand.

He faked a smile at James, one he knew wouldn’t be believed. “Let’s go.”

Eliza had Maria sitting on her lap as the two of them walked by. The girls both gave Alex a sympathetic look, one that he just brushed off. James led him with a hand on the small of his back and didn’t stop the two of them to talk with the girls.

“Okay, but if situations were different, you’d marry me, right?” Alex asked when they were out of earshot of the girls. Tension seemed thick between them and Alex wanted it gone.

James rolled his eyes, but Alex couldn’t see that. “But the situation isn’t different.”

“But what if.”

James sighed. Alex would pursue the topic until he had an answer. “My heart was with you and Dolly five years ago, that’s not different now.”

"So if things fall out with Thom-"

"No, I will not marry you."

Alex had no time to answer because they were approaching Thomas’ office; he figured it wouldn’t be the smartest idea to continue with the current path of conversation.

He was on the phone when they got to the office. He motioned for them to come in, and Alex felt James’ hand move away.

“I’ve gotta go, just tell her that Mom will be upset,” Thomas said, wrapping up the call. “Love you, Liz.”

He looked at the two sitting in his office. “What’s up?”

“We need your first aid kit.” James cut to the chase.

Thomas kept a collected facade, but inside he was screaming. Was one of them hurt? What’s wrong with them? “Why?”

“I-” James cut Alex off with a look. He didn’t think that Alex would be happy with himself later if he told Thomas of the recent events in his current headspace.

“Alex fell down the stairs.”

Thomas didn’t believe him even a little bit, but nonetheless, he got out the kit and handed it to James. James gestured to Alex and Alex held out his hand.

From where he was sitting, Thomas could see that Alex’s knuckles were various shades of blue and green. The skin on a few of the knuckles was broken open and bloody. Elizabeth’s deductive skills came to mind as he saw it and he thought _Alex hit something._

"At least it doesn't appear to be broken, Alexander." James laughed a little bit. 

As James was cleaning and bandaging the hand, Thomas tried to think, _what would Alex hit? Or rather, who?_

“What time are you wanting to leave?” Alex’s voice brought Thomas out of his thoughts.

“Whenever you’re ready.”

-

The silence was deafening. The two of them had been in Thomas’ car for nearly a half an hour, not a single word said between them. Finally, Alex couldn’t take it, anymore ad he broke the silence.

“Are you like your sister where you know everything about everything by just making connections?”

“Hm?” Thomas looked away from the road for a split second to look at Alex.

“What I mean to ask-” Alex took a deep breath to stop himself from rambling. “I didn’t hit anyone, just so you know. I hit a wall.”

Thomas snorted. “Did the wall insult you?”

A silence began to fall over them again, but Thomas was determined to keep them talking.

“Hey, Alex?” He tenderly asked, being wary of crossing any boundaries.

“Yeah?”

“What are we?” Alex snorted as the question left Thomas’ mouth.

“Going soft on me, are you?” Alex tried to tease but stopped at Thomas’ look. “Honestly I don’t know. Friends?”

Thomas blew air sharply out of his nose. “Obviously we aren’t friends, though. At least the ache in my ass and the hickeys on your neck say otherwise.”

Alex didn’t respond and looked out his window, hoping Thomas would drop it. Images of James flooded his mind.

“I guess, I, uh,” Thomas stammered, suddenly feeling nervous. “What I’m trying to say if that, this next week would be a lot easier for the two of us if we were actually dating, would it not?”

More images surfaced. Alex could practically hear James speaking and see him in the car.

“Thomas, I just don’t think I can do that right now.”

Thomas bit his lip and felt his heart drop to his feet. “Okay.”


	18. who can say where the road goes

Elizabeth tied her hair back in a high ponytail with the hair elastic around her wrist. She took her makeup bag out of the drawer left of the sink and was carefully applying her mascara when her phone began ringing on the counter next to her. She answered and put it on speaker, not even looking at the contact name before going back to applying the mascara.

“This is Elizabeth Jefferson, you’re on speaker.” She spoke loudly than she usually would, but it wasn’t a big deal considering she was home alone.

“Oh, um,” Peggy’s voice came over the speaker, the woman suddenly finding herself flustered on the other end of the call. “Nevermind!”

The disconnected tone resonated in the acoustics of the bathroom. Now done with her mascara, Elizabeth put it back in her bag and picked her phone back up. She unlocked it and went to her contacts, scrolling until she found the name **purpura**. She clicked on the call button and set it back on the counter on speaker, going back to her makeup.

Peggy answered on the second ring. Her heart was beating frantically in her chest as she greeted her.

“Uh, hi, again.” Peggy hit her forehead; how could she sound so stupid?

“Actually, you never did say hello the first time.” Elizabeth grabbed an eyebrow palette and went to work. “What’s going on, Purple?”

“Would you-” Peggy stopped suddenly, confused. “Purple?”

“Yeah, your name is in my phone as the Latin word for purple.” Elizabeth absentmindedly informed. “Would I what, Peggy?”

Peggy exhaled and twirled a piece of her hair, looking for comfort amongst her frantic nerves. “Would you- actually, you know what?”

“No, Peggy, I do not know what.” Elizabeth got a little closer to the mirror, making sure her brows were even. When she was satisfied with them, she reached for her eyeshadow.

“Are you free right now?” Peggy cursed herself inwardly. Elizabeth always sounded so cool and collected, yet even her voice made Peggy flustered and her rushing of her words was definitely not helping with that.

“Peggy, doll, while I am free right now,” Elizabeth finished on her eyes and picked out a lip color, “if you’re looking to see me in person, you’re going to have a bit of difficulty.”

 _Damn it._ “What do you mean?”

Elizabeth tried not to chuckle while she applied her lipstick. “I’m in Richmond, baby, and unless you’re willing to drive two hours, then you’re out of luck, Peggy.”

“Could we FaceTime?” The words were out of her mouth before she could stop herself. “I’m sorry if I’m making you uncomfortable and you don’t actually want to talk to me at all.”

Elizabeth fixed the minor smears of her lipstick before responding. “I’m more than alright with talking to you, darlin’.”

Peggy forwent a response and just went ahead and hung up. She then automatically hit the FaceTime button and awaited Elizabeth to answer.

Elizabeth smiled to Peggy once the picture had cleared up and they could see each other properly. Peggy was blushing slightly and Elizabeth fought the urge to deduce the things about her, even though there were some things screaming out to her.

“What’s shaking, beautiful?” Elizabeth just barely caught the pink that her comment invoked upon Peggy’s face as she turned off the light in the bathroom and moved to the room she had claimed as hers.

“Oh, uh, um.” Peggy stuttered. “What’re you doing this week?”

Peggy felt her embarrassment set in at her flustered self. This woman made her head feel fuzzy and her heart beat faster- much like she felt around Lafayette, the only difference being that she didn’t stutter around him anymore.

“Well, let me think, Peggy.” She pretended to be in thought, even though her schedule was already laid out in her head. She set the phone on her dresser for a few moments as she slipped the laid out dress over her sports bra and spandex, and then picked it back up. “I’m in Richmond for about another thirty minutes, then I’m heading to Charlottesville to stay with my brother for a bit. I’m picking my kids up on Wednesday, and we’re staying here in Richmond for a few days, and the following Tuesday we head back to Chicago. Why?”

Peggy’s face grew even redder, something that Elizabeth had thought wasn’t possible. “I was, uh, aren’t you like a genius? Can’t you just guess what I’m going to ask?”

Elizabeth chuckled and gave a sweet smile. “Babydoll, I try not to deduce things about those who I find myself catching feelings for- it tends to make people run for the hills. I could probably deduce what you’re wanting to ask, but I’d rather not take that route, Pegs.”

Peggy smiled at Elizabeth’s comment but tried to hide it. For some reason, Elizabeth’s use of her nickname made butterflies erupt in her stomach. She took a deep breath and decided to stop beating around the bush. “Elizabeth, would you, uh, do you think, uh, would you go on a date with Gilbert and I sometime this week? I’m sorry if I’m reading too much into this and I should just stay in my own lane and-”

“I’d love to.” Elizabeth interrupted. “Go on a date with you, that is.”

Peggy had been bracing herself for the rejection and was taken by surprise when Elizabeth said yes. “Wait, really?”

“Yes, of course, Peggy.” Elizabeth tucked a stray hair behind her ear.

“Okay, that’s great!” Peggy was grinning and her heartbeat was speeding up again. “Does-”

Elizabeth cut her off as her phone started ringing, her brother’s picture showing on her screen. “As much as I’d adore continuing this conversation, Thomas is calling and I most likely need to answer it. Text or call me with a day and time, goodbye Margarita.”

Elizabeth held the phone up to her ear and went about her earlier task of throwing things into her bag.

“Did you do it?” Was her first comment, no greeting needed. “Is my baby brother dating the love of his life?”

“He said no.” Thomas tried to keep the defeat out of his voice, even though he knew that she would see through the thinly shrouded cover. “I was just calling to ask if you’re still coming up tonight.”

Elizabeth made a face, even though she knew he couldn’t see her. “Don’t give up on him, Tommy boy. Just keep asking. I guarantee you two will be dating by the end of the week, or before you go back to DC.”

“You can’t guarantee something like that.”

“Oh, but I can, little brother. I’ve known you since birth and Alex for eighteen years. God, he and I could’ve raised a child in that time.” Elizabeth snorted at the thought. “Anyways, you two will return to DC as a couple, that’s for certain.”

Thomas sighed at his sister’s antics- it seemed as if he was the only one of them that grew up. “Elizabeth, are you coming tonight or not?”

“Yes, I’ll be there in forty-five minutes or so.” She zipped her bag and made her way to the bathroom. “Granted, that’s hoping I don’t get pulled over for not following the speed suggestions.”

“Drive safely.”

“Hey, Tom?” She didn’t wait for a response before continuing to speak. “Ask Lex out again before I get there.”

She hung up, leaving Thomas sighing emptily into the receiver. He stepped back into his bedroom, where Alex was looking around.

“Okay, but why the hell if your bed like that?” Alex questioned almost immediately upon his entrance.

Thomas shrugged and put a smile back on his face. “It’s the family house, I just inherited it. It’s been like that since the 1800s or something.”

Alex made eye contact with Thomas as a wild grin broke out on his face at a sudden idea. He slowly backed up until he got to the bed, and then slid across the top of the duvet into the adjoined study. “You can impress me with your lovemaking and then impress me with your lawmaking. Although, it’d be a bit harder to impress me with your lawmaking.”

Thomas raised an eyebrow and moved out of his spot, just within the doorway. He walked towards the bed, not breaking eye contact. “Is that a challenge, Hamilton?”

“What’re you gonna do, recite the Magna Carta from memory?” Alex sarcastically quipped. “There’s not much else you could do in the lawmaking realm that would impress me.”

Thomas stopped walking when he was on the opposite side of his bed, facing Alex. He smirked, and said, “That’s not exactly the realm that I’m looking to impress in, Alexander.”

-

After having knocked for the second time, Elizabeth went ahead and tried the knob, pleased to find it unlocked. She shut the door loudly and flipped on the lights. Everything looked to be untouched from the last time she had been in the house, not that it was of any surprise to her. Her brother was many things, and immaculate was one of them.

“Honey, I’m home!” She called out, dropping her bag on one of the many furnishings in the entrance hall. She figured that they would hear her, and she didn’t want to take the risk of walking in on unwanted sights of her brother doing ungodly things. It wasn’t often that he didn’t immediately open the door, and she didn’t want to see what was preoccupying him.

She pulled out her phone and was absentmindedly scrolling through social media when Thomas entered the hall, wearing only a pair of sweatpants and his glasses, his hair a mess beyond measures.

“Why did you just let yourself in?” He asked, cocking his head to the side.

“Why did you decide it was a good idea to fuck in the short amount of time it took for me to get here?” She responded, hardly looking up from her phone. “Please tell me that your kitchen still has food because I’m starving.”

Thomas motioned for her to follow him as he led the way to the kitchen, even though they both knew their way around the place like the back of their hand. “In my defense, you gave me forty-five minutes, and there’s a lot of things I can do in forty-five minutes. You just happened to take longer, which allowed me to do more.”

Elizabeth shook her head and pocketed her phone as she followed him. “I don’t need the image of my brother fucking my best friend stuck in my head.”

“Actually, I was doing most of the fucking.” Alex poked his head out from around the entrance to the kitchen, a grin on his face despite his internal turmoil. “Babe, you didn’t tell me that Pip was coming early.”

“Oh, well, surprise.” Thomas pecked Alex on the cheek as they entered the kitchen, already assuming the role of a happy boyfriend.

“Aren’t surprises supposed to be good?” Alex teased, aiming the comment towards Elizabeth. He walked back over to where he had begun making a sandwich, facing away from the other two in the kitchen. When he wasn’t looking at them anymore, he let his face fall into the stony expression it had held before they had entered.

He was feeling immense loads of guilt being dropped into his psyche. It wasn’t right for him to attempt to pursue anything with Thomas, he shouldn’t even be here with him. He shouldn’t keep continuing on with whatever the two of them are, he needs to just end it. Sooner or later, Thomas would find out about James and go back to hating Alex, but more than ever before.

“Right, Lex?” Elizabeth’s voice brought him out of his subconscious, jerking back into reality.

“What?” Alex looked over his shoulder at the two of them, trying to wipe away his expression before either of them noticed something was up.

“Thomas asked why you were so comfortable in front of me wearing only his shirt.” Elizabeth gave him a questioning look. “I told him that you’ve been in far more embarrassing situations with far less clothing.”

“Oh, that’s true.” Alex turned back around and felt his stomach turning at the sight of his sandwich. “Do either of you want my sandwich? I don’t know where my appetite just went.”

He felt Thomas come up and hug him from behind. He fought the urge to flinch away as his emotions started to come to the surface. He felt even more nauseous and tried to take a deep breath.

“You alright, love?” Thomas asked in Alex’s ear, resting his chin on his shoulder.

Alex shrugged Thomas off of him and ducked out of his grasp. _James wouldn’t like this._ He moved out away from the island. _James would be disappointed in you._ He looked at Elizabeth’s confused face and Thomas’ vaguely hurt expression. _James would be_  so  _ashamed._ He looked back and forth between them, before making a beeline out of the kitchen. _You know that James doesn’t like you hanging around other men._

He looked up at the ceiling in the hallway outside of the kitchen. His anxiety seemed to be getting worse and worse; he didn’t know what to do. Alex’s eyes were blurred by tears and a few escaped his eyes before he felt arms wrapping around him. He freaked out for a moment, thinking it was James coming for him before he heard Elizabeth’s voice telling him to calm down.

“Alexander, get him out of your head.” Elizabeth’s voice was soft but stern, a tone leaving no room for argumentation. “I know Maria told you he was back, but let him be dead. You _need_ to.”

“I’m just scared, Pip,” Alex muttered into her shoulder, trying to stop his tears.

“Don’t be.” She back away and held him at arm's’ length away by his shoulders, looking into his eyes. “You need to calm down. Look at your tattoos, think of your mother. Think of her letter. Do whatever you need to, but I’m not going to let that bastard take control of your life again, and prevent you from having a kick ass week.”

Alex’s tears were slowing and he nodded. “I think I need to go lay down.”

Elizabeth nodded. “I agree. Thomas will be back in there later, calm yourself, Lex. Do you mind if I tell Thomas a bit of what is going on?”

“I really don’t want you to.” Alex sheepishly said, wiping his tears away.

“Fair enough.”

Elizabeth stepped back into the kitchen, telling Thomas, “Alex is going to lay down. It’s all going to be okay.”

-

Nearly an hour later, Thomas crept back into his room, just in case Alex was asleep. He wasn't really counting on it, but he didn't want to be wrong. 

He was as quiet as he could be as he took off his glasses and put them in the case in his nightstand drawer. Alex was facing away from Thomas on the bed, and as far as Thomas knew, he was asleep. 

He carefully laid down next to Alex but made sure to keep distance between the two of them. After a few moments, and Alex could tell that Thomas wasn't going to move closer, he spoke up, saying, "You know, you _are_ allowed to move closer to me." 

Without saying a word, and needing no further prompting, Thomas moved closer, wrapping his arms around Alex and holding him close. He placed a kiss on his shoulder, trying to put all of his love into the single kiss.  


	19. o hot damn this is my jam(ilton)

Alex didn’t know when he had dozed off, but he knew that it was either very late or very early when he woke, considering the lack of light coming into the room, despite the curtains being drawn back. At some point in the night, Alex had turned around and wrapped himself around Thomas in a full body hug, much like the first time they had slept in the same bed together.

He tried to move as little as possible as to not disturb his partner. _Huh_ , he thought, _it’s weird to think of Jefferson as a partner._

Luckily, Thomas seemed to be a heavy sleeper, and Alex was able to successfully wiggle out of his arms, leaving a pillow in his place. He stopped at the nightstand where he had left his glasses the previous evening, blindly searching for them. He grabbed the first case he felt, putting the glasses on his face. _Wrong pair,_ he determined when his sight was still blurry. He quickly found his glasses and slipped them on.

Once his glasses were on, he looked back at Thomas’ sleeping form. He felt a smile making its way onto his face. He looked so at peace while he was asleep, something Alex wasn’t used to seeing. It made his heart flutter, much to his chagrin.

His pants were still on the floor, along with the rest of his clothes. He picked them up and fished his phone out of the pocket before silently leaving the room. His phone’s screen told him that the time was just past two am. _Great._

 **To: pegs:** you still up, kid?

He sent the text as he attempted to remember his way through the huge house with no light. He found his way- or what he thought was his way, considering his only goal was to make it to one of the several patios- just as his phone began blaring the intro to _The Bee Movie_.

“When did you change your ringtone?” Alex asked, his voice groggier than he was expecting.

Peggy snorted, saying, “Dude, I can’t even remember what I had for dinner last night. What’s up?”

Alex slid the door open, wincing when it squeaked. He shut it quickly as he saw Thomas’ cat running towards him, not wanting to have to look for the cat in the middle of the night. “Woke up, figured you’d still be up. Did you ask Pip?”

“Ask her what?” Peggy curled up on the sofa next to her boyfriend, resting her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and kissed her forehead, only paying half attention to her conversation with Alex.

“About the date, dipshit.” The stars were bright in the night sky, captivating Alex. He wasn’t used to being able to see them, considering the vast amounts of pollution that come along with living in a large city. He leaned against the patio railing as he talked, trying to pick out constellations he could remember from his mother’s teachings.

“I’m not a dipshit, dipshit. And yes, I did ask, and it’s a yes.”

Alex and Peggy talked for the majority of the next hour, brushing over random topics. Lafayette eventually drifted off, and it wasn’t until he was asleep that she brought up James. The topic was barely talked about, Alex wanting to just rid his mind of his ex-husband.

Peggy yawned and placed a kiss on Lafayette’s cheek. “I’d better get off to bed, Lex. Go on a run or something, explore.”

Alex bid his goodnight to her. The weather was fair enough, though the clouds on the horizon were showing signs of a cold front moving in. It was windy as well, letting him know that the cold front would be moving in very soon; for all he knew, this could be his only time for exploration by himself. It wasn’t a bad idea to go on a run at all.

He slipped back inside. He reached down to scratch the cat behind the ears for a moment, before making his way back silently to Thomas’ bedroom. He crept into it, grabbed his bag, and left as quick as he could; the guilt would eat him alive if he woke Thomas up and he wasn’t able to get back to sleep.

He changed in the bathroom, draping Thomas’ shirt on the towel rack and trading out for a t-shirt he had most likely stolen from John while they were together, and a pair of shorts too big for him that were definitely Hercules’. He shut off the light and tightly shut the bathroom door, opting to just leave his bag in there so he could shower when he got back.

Before he left, he stopped in the kitchen to leave a note for Thomas and Elizabeth. He checked the clock for the time (03:56) and scribbled it down, signed it, and then made his way out of the house.

-

When Thomas woke up, he could immediately tell that something was off. He went and tried to pull Alex closer to him, only to realize that Alex wasn’t there- all that was there was a pillow in his place. He snapped his eyes open and felt the bed next to him. Alex definitely wasn’t there.

He threw the duvet back and quickly got out of the bed, going directly to the nightstand to retrieve his glasses. He threw them on and looked around the room, the light from outside illuminating the room. Alex’s clothes, along with his own, were still scattered about, but his bag was nowhere to be seen.

 _No, no no._ His mind was going to the worst ideas possible- maybe last night was too much for Alex and he got up and left, maybe he was kidnapped. Anything could’ve happened and his anxiety went through the roof.

He raced out of his room, not bothering to shut the door behind him. He only slowed his pace when he heard laughter coming from the kitchen. His sister’s light bell-like laughter rang out against the marble and limestone tile of his kitchen. Thomas rerouted himself, so instead of going to the parlor, where he had initially planned on looking for Alex, he went to the kitchen.

“Stop laughing at me, you dunce!” Alex was feigning a pout at Elizabeth, who was clutching his sides in laughter. There was pancake batter in his hair, the culprit being the faulty spatula in his hand. Or, at least, that’s what Alex would later insist that it was.

“What’s going on in here?” Thomas asked, feeling relief at the sight of Alex.

“He’s such a dumbass!” Elizabeth said between gasps of air she took, still laughing at Alex.

“Babe!” He drew out the a, his tone nothing but whiny. “She’s making fun of me!”

Thomas cracked a small smile, trying to get over his near anxiety attack. Little, little things could set him off at any moment, and this was no different. “Why is she making fun of you?”

“I may have flipped the pancake on to myself,” Alex muttered, his cheeks turning red. “In my defense, your spatula sucks and so does your sister.”

Thomas looked between his sister, Alex, and the mess. He ran a hand through his messy hair and shook his head, shuffling over to the coffee pot. Whereas his twin, and Alex it seemed, were both morning people, Thomas was most definitely not. On the bright side, however, Alex had an addiction to coffee more so than anyone else he had met, so the coffee was already brewed and ready to be poured. He got out a mug and poured some into it before moving to lean on the island by his sister, whose laughter was sobering up.

“Alexander, you scared the shit out of me,” Thomas commented, blowing on his coffee so that he wouldn’t burn his tongue.

“And how did I do that?” Alex turned off the griddle as the final pancakes were finished and he added them to the stack next to him.

Elizabeth snorted. “You weren’t in bed when he woke up and all of your shit is in the bathroom down the hall, Lex. He probably thought that you left.”

“Right on the dot, actually.” He took a sip of his coffee, savoring the bitter taste. “It just scared me a bit after last night, doll.”

“We haven’t even been here a day and your accent is getting stronger by the moment.” Alex mused, moving the pancakes to the island, along with the plates he pulled out. “I’m sorry, dear. I woke up and couldn’t go back to sleep, so I decided to go for a run and explore a bit. I got back just as Pip was waking up. It helped me clear my thoughts about certain subjects.”

Elizabeth was taking off a few pancakes as she responded, speaking before Thomas could hardly open his mouth. “If you think his accent is strong now, just wait until we’re around all of our family. Also, your accent gets pretty damn strong when you’re pissed, bud.”

“It’s alright, Alex, it just worried me a bit.” Thomas also helped himself to the pancakes, ignoring his sister’s comment. “It’s probably a good thing that you went exploring last night, though, because it’s supposed to be getting pretty cold in the next day or so.”

A comfortable silence fell over them, ending only by Elizabeth’s phone ringing. She took one glance at it before saying that she needed to take it, along with a few expletives, and stepped out of the room to do so. Alex looked at Thomas then, many different expressions shown on his face.

“We need to talk, Thomas.”

Those words made his blood go cold, much like anyone’s would with just those four words. He put his fork down on his plate, prepared to listen to whatever Alexander had to say. It wasn’t likely that he’d agree, exactly, with whatever was coming.

“Okay. Let’s talk.” It was too early for this.

Alex’s hands were fidgeting as he began. “I was just wondering, what changed?”

“What do you mean?” Thomas furrowed his eyebrows together in confusion. As far as he knew, nothing had changed between the two of them, despite the two times he had tried to make a change in their relationship the day prior.

Alex’s hair was a mess, but that didn’t stop him from running his hand through it and making the mess worse. “I was thinking a lot on my run, thinking of the past month. You went from barely being able to be in the same room as me without throwing an insult my way to letting me come along with you to meet your family and stay with you for a week. What changed?”

Thomas shakily let out a breath he wasn’t aware that he was holding. Way too early for this. “Alexander, I’ve known you for a long time, yes?”

Alex made a noise of agreement as Thomas resumed eating his pancakes, taking a moment before he continued. “Surely James has made a comment to you on the matter.”

Alex’s eyes widened a tiny amount, thinking for the slightest moment that he meant James Reynolds. He then realized, there was no way that Reynolds knew Thomas; he was talking about Madison. “He actually hasn’t.”

“That makes this a little harder, then.” Thomas swallowed his last bite, set his fork down, and took one of Alex’s hands. “Since it wasn’t obvious enough when you and I were intimate together, or when I asked you to be my boyfriend twice yesterday, I have feelings for you. I’ve known of these feelings for a while, but only recently have I come to terms with them.

“We’ve worked together for a while now, Alexander, and, well, I’ve always had a sense that I had some sort of attraction to you, you are very attractive. But after having a few heart to hearts with you, I realized that I also have an attraction to your personality.” Thomas downed the rest of his coffee and pushed himself off of the counter. He kissed Alex’s forehead and went to leave the kitchen, pausing to look back at him before he totally left. “I’m going to get dressed. You should probably do the same, we’ve got to make a run into town today.”

On his way back to his room, he walked by his sister, who motioned for him to stay.

“Yes, and I understand that but-” Elizabeth looked like she was about ready to strangle whoever was on the other line. She tilted the phone away from her face and covered the microphone, saying to her brother, “I think I’m going to be busy working all day. I heard you and Alex talking, I’m proud of you. Have fun in- Yes, I’m still here.”

She shooed him away, letting him know that she had nothing else to say.

“I swear on my great grandmother’s grave, if you don’t make your point clear in the next thirty seconds, you will be replaced, so help me-”

-

The worst part about Thomas driving was that it became harder and harder every day to keep his eyes on the road and not on Alexander. It didn’t help when the latter had decided that he didn’t like many of the shirts he had brought along with him, so he insisted on wearing one of Thomas’ shirts.

“I don’t see why we have to go all the way to Richmond.” Alex’s legs were crossed on the dashboard of Thomas’ car, despite him being asked to put his legs down. Twice. His hands were tapping a rhythm on his knees, to some song that Thomas couldn’t name.

“Maybe I’m kidnapping you and taking you to my evil lair.” Thomas mused, trying to drown out the tapping with his thoughts.

“I wouldn’t mind,” Alex responded.

A comfortable silence fell over them, save for Alex’s tapping and the sounds of traffic outside the vehicle.

Alex’s thoughts were divided into two categories- the things he wanted to think about and those he did not. His talk with Elizabeth that morning had helped him sort them out, along with putting blocks around the thoughts he wanted to keep his mind from straying too far into.

It was pretty obvious what went into the second category. Things in the first revolved around his friends, his work life. Things he  _needed_  to think about. What to get his godchildren for Christmas.

However, then there was Thomas, the outlier.

Did he want to think about him? Sure. He most definitely did. He wanted to think about him, what he wanted out of the two of them. He didn’t like disorder, he wanted their relationship to fit in a nice little box. He wanted to think about Thomas, about his confession that morning. It had been one thing to hear it from James, it had been another thing to hear it from Thomas himself.

Although something he had discovered on his earlier run was that whenever he began to think about Thomas, he began to think of other things. Of his smile. His hands. His hair. His laugh. His lips. His-

“Alex, what’s your middle name?” Thomas asked, purely out of curiosity.

“Eyes.” His mouth had gotten ahead of his mind, blurting out the first thing in his head. He coughed awkwardly and tried to recover. “It’s uh, it’s Thane.”

Thomas raised a quizzical eyebrow. “Eyes?”

“I was, uh, thinking.”

“Of?”

“You. You have really nice eyes.” _God damn it, Alexander._

Thomas, even though he’d never admit to it, felt butterflies in his stomach at the comment. _I’m like a fucking schoolboy._

“I’m sorry, that sounded creepy.” Alex rushed the words out of his mouth and could feel his face turning red.

Thomas reached over and grabbed Alex’s hand, something he found himself doing more and more. “Don’t be sorry, it was cute. You’re cute. Plus, you probably just said that because you know I have feelings for you.”

The last comment was exactly necessary, but Thomas couldn’t help but adding it.

Alex squeezed Thomas’ hand. “Thomas, I don’t just have sex with people I don’t have feelings for.”

“Then be my boyfriend, Alexander.”

“It’s not as easy as that.”

-

“Okay, so here’s the plan,” Thomas said as he put the car into park. “We’re going to trade phones, okay?”

“Not okay, why do we need to trade phones?” Alex asked, his hand instinctively going to his pocket where his phone was held.

“I have a list of food that we need in my notes, so I’m going to give you my phone because I trust that you’ll be able to at least get started on the food,” Thomas explained, having known from the beginning that Alexander wasn’t just going to _give_ Thomas his phone. “We’re going to split up so that we can get more done quicker, with you going to get food and with me going to get decorations. I need your phone so that I at least have some way of contacting you. You don’t need to give me the passcode or anything.”

Eventually, Alex gave in, but not until they were both inside the store. Thomas grabbed one of the little baskets at the front, along with Alex’s phone, leaving Alex with a cart and his phone. Alex set off towards the food with the cart, pleased to find the list made in order of the aisles in the store. _This shouldn’t be too hard._

He started in the back, the dairy section, and immediately his thoughts of finding food easily went out the window. The first thing on the list was milk. _What kind of milk? Does Thomas like whole milk, skim, 2%? What brand does he like? What-_

Mid-thought, Alex was cut off by Thomas’ phone starting to vibrate. The screen read  _Incoming Call from_ ** _mama <3_**, with a picture of Thomas grinning with his arm around a woman that was around the same height as him, presumably his mother.

_Well, you’re going to have to meet his family this week, may as well start talking to them now._

“Hello?” Alex regretted his decision to answer the phone the moment he held it up to his ear.

“You’re not Tommy.” Thomas’ mother replied with a heavy Southern accent. “Did I get the wrong number?”

“Oh no, ma’am.” Alex rushed the words out while standing in front of the milk and debating which to grab. “This is Thomas’ phone, he left it with me so I could look at the grocery list. I’m Alexander, Thomas’-”

“You’re Tommy’s boyfriend!” She cut him off and Alex could practically hear her smile through the phone. “It is so good to finally get to hear the voice of the man who has stolen my Tommy’s heart!”

Alex couldn’t help but smiling, too- the woman’s happiness just seemed to radiate. “That I am, ma’am. I can go get Thomas if you’d like, so you can talk to him about why you called?”

“That’s alright, sugar.” She stopped him before he could do anything. “You’re just as good. When you see Tommy, could you tell him that we need our Thanksgiving moved up a day? My darling Mary invited myself and my mother over to her home for a Thanksgiving on the actual day since she’s too busy to make it up to Monticello.”

“I can most definitely tell him that!” Alex wedged the phone between his ear and shoulder and grabbed a gallon of whole milk, figuring that Thomas would most likely go for the whole milk.

“Since I’ve got you here,” Thomas’ mother was not going to just let go of the first conversation she was having with her son’s boyfriend, not after hearing about him for the last two years, “how about you tell me a bit about yourself so I have a little insight for Wednesday?”

Alex moved himself and the cart out of the way so he wouldn’t be blocking the way for the other shoppers. He carefully watched his words as to not let on to anything more than Thomas wanted him to say. “What would you like to know, ma’am?”

“Enough of that ma’am crap. Call me either Jane or mom, it’s what all of my kids do. How did you and Tommy meet each other?”

Alex smiled a bit. This woman was incredibly kind and he could tell that much from the three minutes they had been on the phone together. “The two of us actually work together, Thomas and I. I happen to be the Secretary of Treasury. Thomas and I were always at each other’s throats during cabinet meetings, and well, one thing led to another and I found myself catching feelings for him.”

Jane fought the urge to squeal like a grade schooler. She was a grown woman for Christ’s sake. Even if this was the first boyfriend of Thomas’ that she had gotten to meet. “That’s just too cute, sweet pea!”

Alex’s smile grew a bit more. In the corner of his eye, he saw Thomas making his way towards him, but he didn’t want to stop talking to his mother. “You know, I think he’s just too cute, too. He actually- wait, no, give that back!”

Thomas wrangled the phone out of Alex’s hand easily, considering the man was a head and a half shorter than him. He looked at the screen, which bore the picture of him and his mother, and sent a dirty look towards Alex before talking.

“Hi Mama,” Thomas held Alex at an arm's length away by his head, in order to stop him from stealing the phone back. “What’s going on?” Thomas listened as she replied, answering back, “It’s more than fine if you come a day early. I’m sorry about Alex, by the way, he just-” He stopped talking when she cut him off, before saying, “Okay, well I’m very glad you like him, Mama. I’ll see you on Wednesday, I love you too.”

He pocketed his phone when she hung up and looked at Alex, whose foot was tapping and arms were crossed. “Why did you answer?”

“I wasn’t just going to be an ass and let it go to voicemail,” Alex commented. “I thought you were getting decorations.”

Thomas gestured to the full basket by his side. “They were clearing stuff out, so it was pretty easy to grab what I needed and head back here to you.”

They went into the next aisle, grabbing what was needed every so often, making small talk. It wasn’t until they were four aisles ahead when Thomas glanced down in the cart and saw the milk Alex had grabbed.

“Whole milk, really?” He questioned, fighting the urge to roll his eyes at the stupidity.

Alex shrugged. “You didn’t specify on the list, now did you?”

“Can you just take this and go trade it with a gallon of skim?”

Alex complied, walking at a faster pace than usual to get there and get back. It wasn’t exactly a jog or anything, but he wasn’t just dawdling and taking his sweet time to grab the milk. Okay, maybe he was. But had Thomas asked, he would have said that he was walking faster than usual.

He put the whole milk back and grabbed the skim milk. He made his way back to the aisle where they had been, only to find that Thomas wasn’t there. He checked the next aisle, considering that that was the most likely place to find him, and he was correct. Except, Thomas wasn’t alone.

A man taller than Thomas was talking to him, walking forward until Thomas was backed against the shelf and the man was pressed to his chest, looking down on him. Thomas’ nerves were racing; he hadn’t seen this man in quite a long time, it was rather alarming just to suddenly see him again.

“Aw, don’t you miss me, Tommy?” Edmund asked, feigning a pout. “It has been such a _long_ time since we’ve been together, shouldn’t we try something again? After all, I am the best fuck you have ever or will ever have.”

“Please get off of me, Edmund.” Thomas was trying to keep his emotions all in check, knowing that any burst of anything would have Edmund pleased. “I am a very well respected member of the government and this will look very bad on you. I don’t want that to happen to you, so back away.”

“Or what?” Edmund looked rather amused with himself, something Thomas was used to seeing on his face.

Alex felt a spark of jealousy fire up in himself. He walked up to the man, who was much taller than him and pushed him away from Thomas. It wasn’t so much his force that actually made the man get off of Thomas, but more so the surprise that someone was actually pushing him away. Edmund watched as the small man all but threw the milk he was holding into the cart beside Thomas.

Alex grabbed onto the front of Thomas’ shirt and pulled him down, meeting him halfway and kissing him possessively on the mouth. Thomas was completely breathless when Alex pulled away, trying to wrap his mind around the present events. Alex wrapped his arm around Thomas’ waist and tucked his hand into Thomas’ back pocket, before addressing the man still standing there.

“Sir, I doubt that you’d appreciate being on the bad side of not only the Secretary of State, but the Secretary of Treasury and, if spoken to, the President.” Alex’s voice was cold but his glare was ice. “So if you’d excuse us, we have some shopping that we need to get done with.”

Alex guided the two of them out of the aisle with the cart, Thomas still trying to grasp what had just happened. The man, Edmund, had said something else, but Alex was too pissed to care, and he flipped him off for a response. Once they were safely in the next aisle, Alex retracted his hand quickly and took a step away as his actions repeated themselves in his brain.

“Sorry, that probably came off as creepy.” Alex absentmindedly threw four different types of chocolate chips on the cart with two bags of each type. “Like, extremely creepy.”

Thomas was quick to action, grabbing Alex’s hand and pulling him back, tucking said hand back into his back pocket. “You’re wrong.”

“What?” Alex asked, looking up at him.

“It wasn’t ‘extremely creepy.’” He put air quotes around his words. “It was actually really fucking hot.”

Alex tried to fight his blush to no avail. “Was it, now?”

Thomas nodded, his eyes showing a mixture of awe and lust. “Yeah, it really was.”

-

Alex looked up from the article he was reading on his phone. He looked over to Thomas, who was resting his legs on Alex’s lap. They were lounging around in the parlor on one of the sofas, having just eaten dinner (despite it being nearly ten). “Where’s Pip?”

Thomas shrugged, choosing not to look up. “I think she had to go do something for Jasper.”

Alex nodded in understanding, going back to reading on his phone. He made it a few paragraphs in before Thomas interrupted him.

“Alex. Alex. Alexander.” Alex looked up at him and saw a look of excitement.

“Yes?”

“Do you know how to dance?” Thomas grinned at him, praying the answer was no.

“Well, yes, but I highly doubt it’s the dancing that you’re accustomed to.”

Thomas furrowed his brows, his excitement dimmed ever so slightly. “What kind of dancing are you accustomed to?”

“I can bachata, that’s about it.” Alex clicked his phone off and set it down, vaguely guessing where the conversation was heading.

“Good.” Thomas’ grin brightened back up, and before Alex knew it, he was standing up and pulling Alex up right along with him. The music Thomas had been playing through his speakers in the parlor had changed to a slow song, which was exactly what sparked Thomas’ idea.

“What’re we doing?” Alex tried to play dumb, despite knowing where this was going.

“We’re gonna dance.”

It didn’t take long for Alex to learn the basic steps, but after a while, their dancing had reduced to just holding each other while swaying, Alex’s head on Thomas’ chest.

“Moments like this are what makes my heart long to say yes to being your boyfriend,” Alex muttered against his chest.

“Then say yes, Alexander.”

“I just can’t.”


	20. ok i swear this wasn't going to happen

“Okay Elizabeth, but that doesn’t mean that you just up and leave without telling Thomas or me, and then go without contacting either of us the next day.” Alex’s tone was showing his frustration and Elizabeth was glad she couldn’t see his disappointed face.

“Alex, I’m sorry, I really am.” She had been losing the uphill battle of arguing with Alex for the upper end of an hour, him refusing to relent on being upset.

“I know you’re sorry, but that doesn’t take away how worried I was.” He ran a hand through his hair for the umpteenth time. “Not to mention that you still won’t tell me where you were or are.”

“You know that I can’t tell you that.” She felt like crying, but she would never even dare to think about crying in a situation like the one she was in. “You know that I could lose my job and possibly my life for telling you something like that.”

Alex gave a frustrated smile to Thomas, who looked like he had seen better days. “Can you at least tell me if you’re in the country?”

Elizabeth looked around her, before telling him that no, she was not. “I promise that I’ll be back by Wednesday for Thanksgiving. I promise.”

Alex sighed. “Alright. Goodbye, Elizabeth.”

He hung up the phone and tossed it away from him, noticing Thomas wince at the noise. “Are you okay?”

Thomas shook his head no, trying to make as little movement as possible. His head felt like someone had turned on a jackhammer on its highest setting and decided that his head was a better place for practice than concrete. Every little motion and sound hurt, but he knew that he had to get up and brave the day. He gestured to his head for Alexander, who nodded in understanding.

“Do you have any medicine for it?” Alex questioned, already moving around with a plan. He poured a second mug of coffee, this one for Thomas, and slid it in front of the man, waiting for a response.

“I have some in my bathroom,” Thomas whispered, shielding his eyes from the few rays of sunlight streaming in through the blinds. “I haven’t taken any yet.”

Alex put a slice of bread in the toaster and pulled the knob down. “I’ll be right back then.” He was halfway out of the kitchen before he stopped, turned back around, and whispered, “Actually, no. Come with me, bring the coffee.”

Before he went to leave again, he moved back to the toaster and pulled the knob up, taking out the barely warm bread. He brought it with him, grabbing Thomas’ hand as the two of them walked towards Thomas’ room.

“Go back to your bed, drink your coffee and try to eat the bread,” Alex instructed, already heading towards the bathroom.

“Alex, no, I need to-” Thomas tried to argue, despite not being very convincing with his voice barely at a whisper and his eyes squinting.

“Rest.” Alex tried to keep his voice as quiet as he could with still being heard by Thomas. “You need to rest, Thomas. So get into your bed and don’t argue.”

 _He’d be an awful good mother,_ Thomas thought to himself, snickering in his pounding head. He dutifully went to the bed, taking small sips of the cooling coffee. Alex exited the bathroom with a pill bottle in hand. He went about making sure that all of the blinds were closed and the curtains were drawn tightly before making his way to Thomas’ bed. He sat down on the edge next to Thomas.

“Here.” Alex offered the bottle to him, which he gladly took. “I’ll be here all day, obviously, just text me if you need anything, alright?” He didn’t say anything else until Thomas had taken the pills. He helped him move under the duvet until he was in a more comfortable position, and then he placed a kiss on Thomas’ head. “Thomas, I mean it, just so you know. Tell me if you need anything at all, darling.”

Alex left Thomas’ room and went back to the kitchen. It took minimal effort to clean the mess he had made. When he was done, he moved back out to the parlor, where he had left his laptop the night before.

He opened the laptop and entered his password. While he was waiting for his computer to boot up, he grabbed his phone and sent a text to James.

 **To: mads:** Is there anything I can do to help Thomas with a migraine? You know him better than I do. xx

He set his phone down after he had finished the text. His computer still had the document, _Reasons Why Thomas Jefferson is an Asshole_ , pulled up from last night. He had been adding reasons after Thomas had bickered with him about how ‘break is not a time work, Alexander Thane’ and Alexander began to regret telling him his middle name. He closed out of the document, his intent lying with the beginning of a new document, one still revolving around Thomas.

He titled the new document _Pros and Cons._ He split the document into two columns, labeling one _Pros_ and the other _Cons._ He added a header titled _Thomas_ and began to type.

_Pros_

  * _Thomas treats you well_


  * _He listens to what you say and doesn’t argue for the sake of arguing. He has actual points when he does so_


  * _He provides a challenge you have never had_


  * _Not that he’s a challenge that you should take up because he’s a challenge_


  * _His family, or at least twin and mother, are amazing_


  * _He actually has interest in you; you aren’t just some parade piece for him_


  * _(Okay, not to mention, the sex is great)_


  * _He’d be there for you whenever you need him_


  * _You could love him like no other_


  * _He’s Thomas._



_Cons_

After a while of thinking, he couldn’t come up with any prevalent cons. He thought and he thought, but none were coming to mind. He grabbed his phone and called James, seeing as he was his last contacted person.

James answered on the third ring. “Alex, I called you three times, why didn’t you answer?”

“Sorry, I was busy.” Alex knew the words were lousy as they were leaving his mouth, but that didn’t matter. “Jem, you dated Thomas, what are some cons I could add to my list?”

Alex could hear James roll his eyes through the phone. He swears he could. “There really aren’t any. I know you texted asking me about him having a migraine, but before you focus on him, have you focused on your personal hygiene at all while you’ve been down there?”

“I don’t smell bad if that’s your offhanded way of asking,” Alex answered snarkily.

“That’s not what I meant.” James could only imagine how bad Alex would get if he didn’t have people always reminding him. “Have you eaten much? When was the last time you showered? Cleaned your ears and clipped your nails? Put on deodorant? Washed your face and put lotion on? I sincerely hope that you’re taking care of yourself.”

Alex sheepishly coughed, trying to hide the embarrassment that James couldn’t see. “Of course I am, Jemmy dear.”

“Yeah, I can smell the bullshit from here.” James checked the time and blanched; he should have been long gone already. “I have to go, Alexander. Just make sure that Thomas is resting and it all should be fine. Also, I’m coming down for the Jefferson Thanksgiving; if you’ve been neglecting yourself then I will know. Goodbye, love.”

“Bye.” Alex barely had the single syllable from his mouth before James had hung up. He closed his laptop and itched the back of his neck. James was right, he needed to take better care of himself, especially if he was going to try and pursue something with Thomas. He’d, of course, wait until after the Thanksgiving to ask Thomas to be his boyfriend so that that stress would be off of them; but he had made his mind up. He would be with Thomas if he had any say in the matter. And Lord knows that Thomas feels the same.

Alex made his way to the bathroom where all of his belongings were still located. He would need to move those before Thomas’ family arrived. It’d be best if they didn’t see his underwear within five moments of them being at Monticello. He dug through his bag looking for his shampoo and conditioner, found that he had forgotten to pack them.

He fought the urge to hit himself on the forehead over his stupidity. How could he forget the most basic of items? There was nothing in the shower, and so he knew that the only place he’d be able to get any form of soap was in Thomas’ bathroom.

Alex made his way into Thomas’ room, trying his hardest to not make any noise. It had been at least an hour since he had been in his room, and Thomas looked to be asleep on the bed. Alex went into the bathroom and grabbed Thomas’ shampoo, conditioner, and soap and made his way to leave.

“What are you-” Thomas mumbled, his voice filled with sleep and his eyes squinting.

“Hush, go back to sleep, honey.” Alex quietly said, stopping by Thomas’ bed to place a kiss on his cheek. “Goodnight, Tom.”

“It’s only-” Alex cut him off again, but this time by closing the door. He made his way back to the bathroom, now with soaps he needed. He turned on the shower after closing the bathroom door and picked out a pair of clothes. He stripped and got into the shower, relishing in the hot water.

It cascaded over his body, soothing even the tensest of his muscles. He let his entire body get wet before he moved for any of the soap. He wasted no time in getting clean, knowing that the less time he spent in the shower, the more time he would have to do other things. No matter how good the water pressure felt. And God, did it feel good.

He turned off the water and dried off, donning the clothes he had pulled out. He cleared away a bit of the condensation on the mirror to look at himself. The deep purple bruises that usually were found under his eyes were fading more and more each day with all of the rest he was finding at night in Thomas’ arms. He definitely looked as if he had seen better days, but he also looked as if he had definitely seen worse. It was the best he had looked in a long time, and that gave him reason to smile.

He combed through his hair and cleaned out his ears. He tied the damp hair back in a ponytail and hung the towel back up, turning off the light before shutting the bathroom door. While he had been in the shower he had had time to think, and he had a plan for what he’d be doing with the rest of his day.

Alex reentered Thomas’ room, where Thomas still laid sleeping on his bed. Alex gently shook his shoulder to wake him, not wanting to just leave the house in case Thomas woke up and Alex wasn’t back.

“Wha?” Thomas asked, squinting up at Alex as he was jostled awake.

“I need to make a run into town, but I’ll be back shortly.”

-

Thomas blinked slowly, getting used to his surroundings. His head felt much better than it had the last time he woke up. He grabbed his phone and turned it on, little pain coming from the bright light that he had forgotten to turn down that morning. He had a few missed texts that he opened as soon as he saw them.

 **maddy:** Okay, so number one, Alexander loves his hair being played with.  
**maddy:** Number two, call him baby girl. You may be skeptical until you do it, but trust me.  
**maddy:** Number three, don’t let him fall for you if you don’t intend on being there to catch him.  
**maddy:** I mean it, Thomas. You’re my best friend, yes, but Alexander has been through a lot of shit.  
**maddy:** If you don’t intend on the two of you being a long term thing, then don’t let it be a short term thing.  
**maddy:** Also, before the two of you do try to pursue a relationship, talk out the last month for crying out loud.  
**To: maddy:** you should know me, james, if i didn’t see myself having anything with alex, i wouldn’t be trying this hard  
**To: maddy:** and oh, baby girl you say?

 **lil twit <3:** I’m back from town, by the way, just so you know whenever you wake up.

 **[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] bananna scott:** so mom said that thanksgiving was moved a day up, is that right???  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] lil twit <3: ** That’s right! We moved it a day early so that everyone would be able to make it! Is that alright with everyone? Also, could I get everyone’s name with their response so I can add everyone to my phone? It’s Alexander, by the way.  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] bananna scott:** it works for me and it’d better work for randolph because he’s my twin and i say so (my name is anna-scott!)  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] lulu:** I guuuuueeeeeess it works for me, but only because I’m bringing the girl who went on the date with me a while back. -Lucy  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] sigh:** one, i know mary isn’t coming, but is she even in this chat? two, i’ll, of course, be there because food! (yo yo yo, the name's peter and im the family disappointment)  
**[Group MMS- Jeffersiblings] randios:** I mean, you aren't wrong, Petey. -Randolph, twin of Anna-Scott

Thomas smiled to himself at how Alex was getting along with his siblings. It was wonderful, and he was glad they were getting along because his family was his life. He grabbed the glasses still in the case next to him and put them on, the world becoming clearer around him.

He made his way out of his room and stopped in his tracks. It seemed like an autumn wonderland, with a garland made of leaves strung up everywhere, along with soft white fairy lights intertwined.

“Alex?” Thomas called out as he walked into the parlor, which was similarly decorated, along with an arrangement of flowers and gourds on the mantle. Alex was sitting on the sofa with his glasses on as well, typing away on his computer. “Did you do all of this?”

Alex looked up from his computer and smiled at Thomas. “Yeah, I hope I wasn’t too out of line. I just wanted to decorate the place so it felt more festive for your family Thanksgiving.”

“No, it looks great.” Thomas smiled back and thought of James’ texts. “Can I sit by you?”

“Of course!” Alex closed his laptop and put it aside. He patted the spot next to him jokingly for Thomas. Thomas sat down next to him and took his chances and put his arm around him. Alex moved so he was leaning into Thomas’ side. “How’s your head feeling?”

“It’s feeling a lot better, thank you, sugar.” His accent was still heavy from sleep, but Alex could hear the sincerity through it. “Alexander, you got to talk to me seriously on Saturday morning, can I talk to you seriously now?”

Alex looked up at Thomas, his eyes showing a bit of confusion. “Of course you can.”

“Okay, well first I need to do something that I don’t do often.” Although Thomas’ mind was still sleep ridden, and he hadn’t thought everything through, he knew that this was needed. “I’m sorry, Alexander. I’ve always been an ass beyond reason to you, one that you don’t deserve. Especially when it comes to your debt plan or otherwise. I may not exactly agree with a lot of your ideas, but I was going about trying to suppress my feelings for you in a douchey way.”

“Well, thank you, Thomas, that means a lot to me.” Alex hadn’t been expecting the apology, but it was just another thing to add to the _Pros_ list.

“Also, I wanted to tell you thank you.” Thomas continued. “Uh, you didn’t have to come to me or talk to me about anything that happened between you and John. But you did, you confided in me, and that means a lot to me. Oh, and you can really rock a dress, I didn’t really have the right words to express it to you at the time. I was pretty much speechless because you looked, for lack of better words, hot as hell.”

Alex smiled and laid his head back on Thomas’ shoulder. “You know, it’s getting harder and harder to tell you no.”

Thomas’ smile dropped. His voice was almost pleading when he said, “Then stop saying no, Alexander.”

Alexander weighed his options in his head. Say no to Thomas again, despite every nerve in his body screaming for him to say yes, or say yes to Thomas, despite the thought of James poking through at the edge of his mind. He took a deep breath, before looking at Thomas once again.

Thomas was no longer looking down at Alex, but Alex had every intention of changing that. He reached up and placed his hand on Thomas’ cheek, moving the taller man’s head until he was looking back at him and making eye contact. Alex looked into his eyes for a few more seconds before pulling Thomas down to meet him in a kiss. Alex intertwined his hands in Thomas’ curly hair, and Thomas was quick to move Alex so the smaller man was straddling him.

Alex licked Thomas’ bottom lip, asking for entrance that he was denied. Thomas pulled apart from Alex and tried to rest his forehead against Alex’s, keeping his hands firmly placed on Alex’s ass. Alex didn’t stop his advances on Thomas, despite Thomas stopping his.

“You’re trying to distract me.” Thomas murmured, his voice a bit sadder.

“You stupid, stupid man,” Alex muttered against Thomas’ skin between kisses down Thomas’ neck, where he was relentlessly sucking a hickey into the skin. He paused for a moment and looked up at Thomas with pupils blown wide. “I’m done trying to lie to myself, Thomas. Yes, I’ll be your boyfriend.”

Thomas’ eyes widened and the few specks of sadness amongst the lust in his eyes disappeared. “Really?”

“Yes, Thomas, yes I’ll be your boyfriend.” Alex grinned down at the man, whose grip tightened on his ass.

Thomas stood up, letting Alex wrap his legs around his waist. He began to kiss him once more, with even more passion than he had shown thus far. Alex met with his own passion, barely noticing Thomas backing the two of them up until Alex was pressed up against the wall, grinding against Thomas.

“Oh, the things I’m going to do to you, baby girl,” Thomas whispered, kissing down Alex’s neck and sucking hickeys wherever he could.

-

 **To: [Group MMS- interventilton]:** Hi, yes, I’m resurrecting this chat to tell everyone that I accepted Thomas’ offer of companionship.  
**[Group MMS- interventilton] Le Meilleur:** Do you mean to tell me that you are, how you say, entretenir une liaison?  
**[Group MMS- interventilton] pegs:** bitch i told you that you two would fall madly in love  
**[Group MMS- interventilton] mads:** Finally.  
**[Group MMS- interventilton] Le Meilleur:** I don’t understand  
**[Group MMS- interventilton] best of wives:** pegs, explain it to your boyfriend jesus. proud of you babe!

“Put down your phone, we’re cooking!” Thomas playfully snapped the dish towel he was holding in Alex’s direction, not actually hitting the other man.

Alex was clad in only his boxers and socks, claiming to be ‘too worn out’ to don any other clothes. Thomas, on the other hand, was in a pair of jeans that Alex had made a few lewd comments towards (“they’re just _so_ tight!”), a tank top, and a bandana tying back his wild curls. They both were wearing their glasses, and Thomas was very pleased with the purple marks littering Alex’s neck and chest from the night previous.

“I don’t even see why we’re cooking; don’t we do all of the cooking on the day of the actual meal?” Alex set down his phone next to him on the counter where he was sitting. He was watching Thomas as the man gracefully moved around the kitchen, until he stopped in front of Alex, standing between his legs.

“Alexander, I am so sorry.” The thought had just occurred to Thomas and he felt utterly terrible. “I am so, so sorry. This was so inconsiderate of me.”

“What are you blabbering on about?” Alex asked, rather amused.

“You aren’t from America- let alone the South- you’ve never had a real Thanksgiving, have you?” Thomas was trying not to panic; it seemed that he was becoming more and more like his best friend every day.

Alex snorted, shaking his head with a grin on his face. “No, Thomas, I haven’t. But hey, I guess that means that I don’t have to help with cooking because I don’t know what I’d be doing.”

Thomas narrowed his eyes with a mischievous grin, his anxieties melting away at Alex’s laugh. He pulled Alex off of the counter, eliciting a shocked squeal from the smaller man. “Oh no, you don’t.”

Thomas put Alexander to work on one of the pies and the two of them worked in harmony, maintaining steady small talk.

Alex thought of an idea, and he moved away from his pie with a new smile on his face. He grabbed his phone from where he had left it, turned the volume up all the way, pulling up Spotify. “Babe, we didn’t have Thanksgiving, but you know what that meant?”

“What’s that, darlin’?” Thomas barely spared him a glance, too focused on his cranberry sauce.

He clicked shuffle on his most recent playlist, laughing from happiness when Mariah Carey’s voice started playing through his phone’s speaker. “Our Christmas music starts earlier.”

Thomas turned around then. “Alex, it’s still November.”

“That sucks, Thomas!” Alex moved over to Thomas, taking his boyfriend’s hands, making the latter dance with him.

He sang to Thomas and the two of them were too caught up in each other to notice the knocking at the front door. The two at the door got tired of knocking, and went ahead and entered, finding it unlocked. They could hear the Christmas music playing, and when they got to the kitchen, they found Alex and Thomas locked into a sweet kiss, brought by the end of the song.

“Well, this is just too cute!”

Thomas and Alex broke apart immediately at the sound of the voice.

“Mama, Nana, I wasn’t expecting you this soon.” Thomas’ eyes were wide as his mother caught the two of them. It wasn’t like they were doing anything inappropriate, but he still couldn’t help feeling like he was a teenager being caught with his first boyfriend.

Alex, on the other hand, was screaming in his mind. He opened his mouth, but all that came out was, “You’re Thomas’ mother and grandmother.”

“That we are, sugar.” Thomas’ mother responded.

“You’re Thomas’ mother and grandmother and I’m in my underwear.”

Alex moved to try and leave the kitchen as soon as he could, but on his run out, he slipped and fell, do to his socks. His face turned a dark shade of scarlet, and he was back on his feet dashing out of the kitchen.

“He’s charming, isn’t he Tom,” Nana commented, a pleasant smile on her face.


	21. THE TRASH IS BACK

_ James placed a sweet kiss on Alex’s cheek whilst tucking a piece of the smaller man’s hair behind his ear. He relished in the sweet blush that bloomed across the apples of Alex’s cheeks and gave him a smile. One of his hands cupped Alex’s face and the other one gripped Alex’s hip. _

_ Alex leaned into James’ hands and stood on his tiptoes to place an equally sweet kiss onto his lips. James held him there and kissed back, not moving to deepen the kiss. It was the moments like this that Alex loved; the sweet moment where he remembered how he and James fell in love.  _

_ James pulled away, Alex chasing his lips. James chuckled at that and stepped apart, standing a body’s length away and moving his hands to hold Alex’s. _

_ “I love you, you know that right, darling?” James asked, cocking his head slightly to the side.  _

_ “Of course I know that.” Alex smiled, scrunching his eyebrows together in confusion. “And I love you, James. Is everything okay?”  _

_ James nodded, pushing all of the negative thoughts out of his head. All of the thoughts of the stalker, of the killer, of the rapist and the broken deal. All that mattered was the beautiful man in front of him and what he was about to do, not what drove him to do it. He would have done it no matter what, this was just an excuse to do it sooner. “Everything is wonderful, my dear.”  _

_ He felt the box in his pocket and broke apart from Alex, moving down onto one knee. Alex looked down at him in confusion, and then understanding, and then his look turned into one of anxiety. “James, sweetheart, what are you doing?”  _

_ James looked up at his boyfriend, soon to be fiancé. He took one of Alex’s hands in one of his own and began to speak. “Andy, I know that we haven’t been together for the longest time, but I also know that there is no one that I love more than you. And, well, to cut this long speech short, will you marry me, love?”  He had taken the ring out while he was speaking and was looking up expectantly.  _

_ Alex’s heart plummeted. He really did  _ not _ want to marry James, he did not at all. He hesitated for a moment too long and James’ expression began to change. The hand holding his tightened its grip and James cocked an eyebrow, saying, “Alexander, you  _ will _ marry me, right?”  _

_ Alex tried to gently take his hand away, but when that didn’t work, he forcefully took it back. “Jamie, this is just very sudden. I need to think about it.”  _

_ James’ hands fell and his anger began to cloud over his happiness and kindness. “What do you mean?”  _

_ Alex backed up and he could feel a fight brewing. “I just need to think about it.”  _

_ Alex turned around and began to walk away, trying to escape the inevitable. All he did, however, was fuel James’ anger more. “What the hell do you mean, you need to think about it?”  _

_ Alex paused and turned back to face him, tears welling in Alex’s eyes- from anger, anxiety, or anger, he didn’t know. “I just can’t be what you want James! I know you and you never supported my going to school- you wanted me to be a perfect stay at home boyfriend for you! _

_ “But I’m not just some wife from the sixties!” He was yelling by now but didn’t notice nor care. He was making wild arm movements, nearly crying, and all that really registered was his frustration and James’ growing anger on his face. “I want to become something, but you want me to remain quiet and complacent! But I will  _ not _ be! I will not be the obedient and comatose husband that you want, stuck at home in the suburbs with our kids and a dog and a garden of herbs! I will not be the sidekick getting asked how it feels to be following along like a dog at the genius’ heels! I want to be something, Jamie, but you don’t want me to be anything at all!” _

_ James crossed the space between them in two strides, grabbed Alex’s hips forcefully, and pulled him flush against his body. He was trying to push his anger aside, but he was failing as he grabbed Alex’s chin and forced it up, forcing the smaller to look at him. Deadly silent, he spoke, “Perhaps you misunderstood me, Alexander. I don’t remember making a request. Will you marry me?”  _

_ Alex nervously gulped and a few tears escaped his eyes. “Yes, James.”  _

_ James nodded and forced a kiss onto Alex’s lips. “That’s what I thought, Alexander. Alex, baby. Alex.” That was odd, he couldn’t remember James saying his name that many times and he never called him Alex. “Alex, -” _

“Alex, darling.” It wasn’t James saying his name. Thomas was shaking Alex’s leg, trying to bring him out of his stupor. He was worried; Alex had been spacing out for the upper end of ten minutes now. “Come on, love, Ma wants us to help set the dining room before my siblings start to show up. I also want to go over everything with you one more time.” 

Alex shook his head, coming out of the headspace he was so absorbed with. He allowed Thomas to lead him to the kitchen, barely lifting his feet, socks sliding on the hardwood floor. “It’s nine in the morning, why are we already setting the table?”

“Because Thomas’ siblings will start getting here at about noon and everything needs to be done well in advance.” Thomas’ grandmother was a kind lady, in her late eighties but could still kick ass, or that’s what she insisted to Alexander the night previous. She hit Thomas’ mother on the arm as she passed, picking up spices as she moved. “At least, that’s what Jane thinks.” 

“Mother, everything  _ does _ need to be done well in advance.” She gave her mother a withering glare. “Tommy, the napkins and utensils are on the island.” 

“Thank you, Ma.” Thomas tried to not let go of Alex’s hand, but in order to grab everything, he ended up having to let go. “Come on, Alex.” 

“You go ahead, I’ll be right there, dear.” Alex ran a hand through his hair; he felt like he should do this and it was the perfect moment, despite him still being in his pajamas with messy hair and his glasses. Thomas looked confused, but Alex shooed him away. 

Thomas’ mother paused in her cooking to look at Alex. “Somethin’ bothering you, sugar?” 

Both of the women looked expectantly at Alex, who gave them both a smile. “No, not exactly, but in the time of Thomas and I dating, this is the first time I’ve met either of you and so I haven’t gotten the opportunity to do this. Mrs. Jefferson, Mrs. Randolph, I’d like to have your blessing in dating your son and grandson.” 

Thomas’ mother walked over to Alexander and enveloped him in a hug, saying, “I couldn’t think of anything I’d like to do more than give you my blessing. And enough with that Mrs. Jefferson crap, it’s Ma to you.” 

When she let go of him, Thomas’ grandmother was standing there, waiting for the moment when her daughter let go of him. The first thing she did was smack him upside the head, shaking her head. “Of course you have the blessing, dumbass. Now go help Thomas set the table.” 

-

“And who is this?” Thomas held up another picture to Alex, who fought the urge to roll his eyes. When they had finished setting the table, Thomas had insisted on going over all of the details of the relationship he had fabricated for his family, and then go over the family in question. 

“That’s Anna-Scott, she’s the twin to Randolph, who was named for your mother’s maiden name.” Alex blew air out of his mouth, bored beyond reason. “Let’s go outside, Thomas.” 

Thomas shook his head. “Nope, it’s absolutely freezing out there, darlin’. But correct, this one is Anna-Scott. And she’s married to?” 

“No one; the only married ones are Mary and Randolph and the only one other one in a long term relationship is Martha, although it’s unlikely that Martha will bring her family.” Alex’s posture was something terrible and he was about to fall asleep with how bored he was. And that was saying something. “We’ve already been over all of this three times. I think I’ve got it all under control.” 

Thomas smiled kindly, setting his cards down to pull his hair back. “I know you do, I just want to be certain.” 

Alex nodded. He patted his boyfriend’s knee, getting up from his seat saying, “I need to go shower.” 

“After that you need to look over everyone some more!” Thomas called after him. 

“After I’m done, people will start getting here and I won’t need to.” 

Alex picked up his bag and brought it with him into the bathroom, pulling out a button down and a pair of jeans, along with a change of underwear. He undressed and went to turn on the shower, only to find nearly a dozen different levers and knobs and such, none of which he knew how to use. 

“Thomas, can you come and help me?” He cracked open the door and shouted. He impatiently tapped his foot, haphazardly tying a towel around his waist. He just wanted to take his shower. After about a minute with no response, Alex opened the door to yell again, only to be met with Thomas’ chest. 

“Someone’s a little impatient,” Thomas commented, a smirk on his face as he looked down on the smaller man. “What’s the matter, hot stuff?” 

Alex tried to take a step back, only for Thomas to stop him with his hands on Alex’s hips, loosening the towel even more so than it already was. “I have absolutely no idea on how to work your shower.”

Thomas blinked a few times, the message sinking in before saying, “Oh, yeah, of course. The shower. Here, let me show you.” Thomas let go of him and went to move past him to turn on the shower, fiddling with a few of the different knobs. 

“Oh and Thomas?” Alex’s voice took on a teasing tone, stopping Thomas in his move to leave the bathroom. 

“Yes, doll?” He responded, turning just in time to see Alex grinning cheekily and dropping his towel. “I don’t suppose that you need to take a shower as well.” 

-

“Get your ass out here!” Anna Scott yelled, pounding on Thomas’ bedroom door. “If you don’t get out here then I’m going in!”

“Just hold on a moment!” Thomas called back, pausing what he was doing. “Don’t get your panties in a twist.” 

“Oh, I don’t want your family to get upset.” Alex tried to turn around, only for Thomas to hold his head in place. “It’s really not that important, Thomas.” 

“I’m already over halfway done.” Thomas continued his activity, ignoring his sister’s pounding at the door. 

Anna Scott looked next to the door, where her brother had joined her. 

“Ma’s getting pissy,” Peter informed, cracking a smile. “Are they having sex?”

Anna Scott rolled her eyes and stopped knocking. “It’s the only explanation as to why it’s been taking them so long.” 

“I’ll take care of it.” He tucked a stray piece of hair behind his ear before opening the door, proclaiming loudly, “Fucking is not for family dinners, my dears! Wait, you two aren’t having sex? Anna Scott said you were.” 

“Oh my god, get out Peter.” Thomas shouted at his brother, not noticing as his sister peeked around the corner. “This is why you’re the family disappointment!” 

“Why would you invade Tommy’s personal space like that, Peter?” Anna Scott stepped into the room and sent a wink to Alex when neither of her brothers were looking. “This is why we can’t have nice things.”

“But you said-” Peter tried to protest, looking flabbergasted as his sister cut him off. 

“Just go help Ma with the potatoes.” She waited until her was out of the room before continuing. “Ma is upset that you haven’t been out to greet all of us, let alone introduce your boyfriend to us. In fact, I think what she said was something along the lines of ‘he just thinks that he’s all that now that he’s some fancy government secretary’.”

“Just let me finish Alex’s hair, hang on.” Thomas instructed, only for Alex to stop him from saying anything else. 

“I’ve got it, Thomas.” He turned with a smile. “It’s just a braid, I know how to do a braid. Go out and see your siblings.” 

“Are you-” 

“Got out Thomas, go save us from our mother.” 

As Thomas reluctantly stood us, Anna Scott walked over and jumped into the place that Thomas had been occupying. Once Thomas was out of the room and Alex was finishing his hair, she grinned and said, “It’s nice to see you again, Mr. Hamilton.” 

Alex furrowed his eyebrows in confusion as he settled on just pulling the remaining hair into a bun. “I’m very sorry, have we met?” 

“Well, yes, but you probably don’t remember me.” She said cheerfully. “I was only ten, but Mas needed someone to watch me and James Madison offered. You happened to show up with a box of pizza and a bag of candy and Disney movies.” 

Alex let out a little laugh. “That was nearly twelve years ago, how the hell do you remember that?” 

“I have a great memory.” She stood and popped her back. “Which means that I remembered how utterly destroyed that James was after you two broke up. All of this goes to say that if you even think of hurting Thomas like you hurt James, I will draw and quarter you.” She grabbed Alex’s hand and pulled him up with a grin. “Now let’s go my dear, you have a family to meet.” 

Alex didn’t exactly know how to respond and so he allowed himself to be dragged into the dining room, where more people were now bustling about, going in and out of the kitchen with new dishes to arrange on the table. 

“Alexander!” Alex looked in the direction of where his voice was being called, where James Madison was leaning against a wall, motioning him over. Anna Scott let go of his hand and went to join her siblings amongst the chaos, joining in on a conversation with who Alexander recognized to be Jane, taking one of the plates from her. Alex awkwardly maneuvered around the people to go stand next to James, who offered a hug that Alexander automatically accepted. “They won’t let you help, believe me I’ve tried.”

“It’s just our southern charm, Jemmy dear.” Lucy set down her two bowls on the table and pushed them towards the center until she was satisfied. “Well, Ma’s southern charm. She’d probably slap us upside the head if she caught either one of you tryna help.” She wiped her hands on her jeans before actually turning to face the two men. “If anyone asks where I am, tell ‘em that I’m changing. And if Charlie shows up, tell her which room is mine.” 

“Hey, no tomfoolery between you two, not in this house.” James called after her, but Alex wasn’t quite certain that she heard him over all of the other conversation in the area. 

“They’re quite a loud family, aren’t they?” Alex mused, watching as they all moved around in what looked like perfect harmony, no one running into each other and everything moving at just the right moments. 

“You have no idea.” James snickered, crossing his arms. “Just pray that they don’t start fighting. Nothing is louder than the Jefferson clan fighting.” 

“Alright, everyone put down what you’re carrying on the table and clear out!” Thomas entered the room, putting down his basket of rolls on the table. Without looking up at his siblings, he said, “Jane, I know that you’re already dressed, so you can go wait for Elizabeth and Randolph. We’re sitting down in fifteen minutes, don’t forget it.” 

“He just thinks that he’s all that now that he’s some fancy government secretary.” Anna Scott mocked as she walked past James and Alex. 

James snorted a laugh and pushed himself off of the wall. “Are we banished as well?” 

“Well, yes, but so am I.” Thomas walked over and put his arm around Alex. “I apologize for my family in advance- they’re quite a mess of things.” 

“Most families are, my dear.” Alex smiled slightly, but dropping the smile when he thought of his own family. 

-

“Alright, now Alexander, you can sit in between Thomas and Elizabeth. Charlie, you can sit on the end next to Lucy.” Alex sat where he was instructed to by Thomas’ mother. Everyone else had sat down in an arrangement that Alexander was positive was planned earlier, including James, leaving Alexander and Charlie, Lucy’s girlfriend, awkwardly standing there. With a little shuffling around, however, all eight siblings, three guests, mother, and grandmother were all able to fit comfortably around the large table. 

Everyone began to pile food onto their plates, casual conversation ensuing along with it. Thomas shot Alex an encouraging smile and helped with the things that weren’t quite in Alex’s reach. Once everyone had taken what food they wanted, the conversation slowly weaned off until it was nearly silent. Thomas placed his hand on Alex’s thigh in a comforting gesture as his grandmother began to speak. 

“Well, personally, I am thankful that we all seem to be in good health, even Jeremy, who always seems to have stage four influenza.” She shot a playful look over to James, who muttered something about that not being his name. 

“And I am thankful that I was able to talk my mother into coming.” Thomas’ mother rolled her eyes. “‘You all will have to get used to me not being around,’ she said.” 

And so it went, with each person naming one thing that they were thankful of. In some cases, like Anna Scott, it was playful with serious undertones, saying things such as ‘I’m thankful that Randolph’s devil of a wife finally filed for divorce’ and in other cases, such as Lucy, it was complete bullshit, saying things along the lines of ‘I’m thankful that the president hasn’t outlawed blueberries’. Soon it came back around to Alex and Thomas, the latter squeezing the former’s leg in comfort as he opened his mouth to speak. 

“I am thankful that I have such a caring boyfriend with such a wonderful family that welcomed me with open arms.” Alex smiled at Thomas lovingly as Elizabeth made retching sounds next to him. 

“Oh, shut up Elizabeth,” Martha reprimanded, saying, “they’re cute.”

Alex’s cheeks flushed at that and he pulled a piece of hair anxiously from his bun to fiddle with. He didn’t normally get this nervous around people he didn’t know, what was wrong with him?  _ For one, this is Thomas’ family and you so desperately want their approval. One wrong move could-  _

“Hey, no arguing you two,” Jane reprimanded, saying, “this is supposed to be a relaxed family gathering. Tommy, your turn.” 

Thomas squeezed Alex’s leg again, and this time Alex couldn’t tell who it was supposed to comfort. “Well, I am thankful to have someone as great as Alexander in my life, even though his ideas in government are less than desireable.” Alex hit his shoulder playfully and Thomas continued. “I am also thankful that my family is all in good health and has accepted Alexander so lovingly.” 

-

Alex stood by Thomas with his arm around his waist protectively as they stood on the porch, waving goodbye to Thomas’ family as they pulled away in their respective vehicles. 

“I’m glad they all liked you.” Thomas said, smiling down to Alexander. 

“I’m glad, too.” Alex leaned a little into Thomas’ side, saying, “They’re all wonderful.” 

“They really put on a good show.” Thomas joked, “Normally our Thanksgivings end with one or more people storming out of the house and food being thrown.” 

Alex chuckled and Thomas placed a kiss on Alex’s head. “And now we get the pleasure of cleaning up.” 

“Ma took care of most of the dishes.” Thomas led Alex inside as he spoke. “You can go get changed, if you want. We can have a movie night.”

“Sounds good, Thomas.” Alex stood up on her tiptoes and placed a kiss on Thomas’ cheek. He headed to the bedroom, where his belongings had been moved the day before. 

He took out his contacts and quickly changed from his button down and jeans into one of Thomas’ shirts that he pulled from the dresser. It came down to mid thigh on him so he decided to forgo pants. He pulled his glasses out from their case and cleaned them off, before grabbing his phone and heading back out. He sat down on the sofa and opened his phone, seeing the amount of notifications that he missed. 

Alex answered to a few texts he missed. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he felt the sofa dip next to him. Thomas kissed his forehead, saying, “What’s wrong, darlin’?” 

“I have eight missed calls from the same number.” He muttered, tapping on the area to call back. 

“It’s probably nothing, hon.” 

“I’m calling back.” 

Thomas took Alex’s free hand in his, tracing soothing circles on the back. He couldn’t hear the other part of the conversation, so he just listened to Alex’s half. 

“Hello?” 

“Yes, this is he.” Alex cautiously spoke, feeling his nerves slowly rising. Thomas heard his sharp intake of breath and felt Alex’s grip become tighter on his hand. 

“Yes sir, I understand. Thank you for calling me and telling me.” Alex hung up and set his phone down next to him, looking everywhere but Thomas. 

“What’s going on, Alexander?” Thomas asked, brushing a piece of hair back behind Alex’s ear. 

Alex took a shaky breath before saying, “My brother and his family were in a car accident. All four were pronounced dead on sight.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am so sorry   
> actually no i'm not  
> i went through a lot and then i couldn't write and then my meds were taken away and then they were changed and so much has happened my dudes  
> i went back and edited every damn chapter, and some stuff was changed, just so ya know. you don't have to read all of them? but just know that the relationship between reynolds and hamilton was shorter and the relationship between madison and hamilton was actually a thing that happened  
> hopefully there'll be more soon  
> i'm going to try  
> sigh


	22. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

hey what's up my dudes

so it's ya boy andie here with the latest news and get this: i'm not updating this again. why, you ask? man it sucks. like, a lot. 

other than that, my tumblr is always open if you want to talk or have a pal or yell at me (helianthusposts) and have a gay day my bros

this gay wad is out

peace


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